Hold On
by SessInSunglasses
Summary: Oneshot. Following Beth and Daryl's struggles as they lose and find each other, and the group, again, after the fall of the Prison. Very angsty, and I cried at the end, so it's definitely a tear-jerker! Daryl's POV.


Hey, all! First off I want to apologise to some of my reviewers that this story is a new one, and not a continuation of the last one - I got this idea and I had to run with it - Sorry! Anyway, now that that's out of the way, I hope ya'll enjoy this story - even though by the end I'm pretty sure a lot of you will hate me, lol. Please keep in mind that none of the songs I've used are mine, or the rights, etc, etc, but I will recommend a playlist, and that is all the songs from the show you can get your hands on. Makes the words fly by faster! Anywho, all odd vernacular and bad contractions are intentional, so if you have a little difficulty reading Daryl's point of view - again, I'm sorry in advance. That said, on with the story!

**Hold On**

I watched the black car speed away in the dark, its' taillights fadin' as it outpaced me. I ran after it, knowing I'd never catch it, but that didn't stop me. I screamed her name, puffin' hard, as the taillights turned and winked outta sight.

"Beth! _Beth_!"

When I reached the turn, I could just make out the red glow ahead. However futile my chase might be, there was nothin' else I could do. I _had _to keep followin'.

As I ran, my mind went back to ten minutes ago, and underneath my panic I felt the alien sensation of anticipation flood my gut. We'd been eatin' our dinner, and she'd been writing a Thank-You note to whoever the funeral home belonged to. We'd never know now, but at the time I'd snorted when she'd announced what she was doin'.

"Why?" I'd asked, my tone acidly condescending. I was busy thinkin', _Who fuckin' cares?! There's food, booyah! _But I'd forgotten for a moment that this was Beth, and the why's and wherefore's were probably thin's I'd never in a million years even begin to understand, but comin' from her, they made actual sense. Perfect sense, in fact. It was one of the reasons I respected her, it was just in her nature.

Beth was a survivor, but not in the typical sense. She wasn't battle-hardened, or tough as shit. She pretended to shut off her feelin's to get through a death but I knew better now, since we'd spent almost a week slowly gettin' to know each other. She'd survived because other, harder people cared enough about her to ensure it. She was lucky that way, until now, that is, what with Hershel gone and Maggie's whereabouts unknown. I envied her that, the deep love she'd shared with her father and sister. If I'd ever known such a thin', it was so long ago I'd forgotten.

She had her moments though, I had to give her that much. Her little display a few days back in my improvised camp had shown me a whole new side to her personality. I really hadn't wanted to think 'bout what'd happened at the Prison... I functioned better if I didn't think at all. Her bratty insistence that I do so had awoken somethin' in me, somethin' I hadn't known I still possessed, and that was hope. My gut had wrenched watching her cry in the country club, the long sought-after bottle of peach schnapps untouched 'fore her on the bar despite ever'thin' we'd gone through to get it, and I'd made a decision. _I _would be Beth's family now, not because I felt responsible for her, or wanted to replace what she'd lost, but because _she _was worth savin'. Her humility, her sense of honour, preservation, and yes, her own compassion, which far outweighed mine, were worth savin'. What was the point of living if these thin's didn't exist? If there was no hope?

I'd lived with these qualities around me for the last two years, and lettin' 'em slip away now, because one big-fuckin'-asshole didn't know when to back off, felt wrong to me, so I'd sucked it up and done my level best to keep her safe. Thought I'd succeeded too, but of course, I was wrong.

I felt the cool night breeze force a few tears out of my wind-burnt eyes as I jogged along, the only light comin' from the moon and the two tiny pin-pricks of red ahead in the dark. _Why _had I flung open the door like that? I was _never _so careless! And now Beth was gonna pay for it, and the thought caused a sharp pain deep in my chest. The darkness closed in 'round me as the red lights finally disappeared.

I wiped the moisture away. Cryin' wouldn't bring her back to me, and it was pointless, anyway. I told myself to stop being a pussy and just _focus_.

Her face swam before my mind's eye, candlelight shadows etched into her dirty skin, deep shadows makin' her seem so much older than her eighteen years. I'd often wondered this past week just exactly how old she really was, 'cause some of the thin's she said and did were so beyond me I couldn't fathom 'em. Like covering up the walker mounted on the mannequin, or cryin' for the one I'd used for target practice. The drinking game. Which, I'd thought at the time to be childish bullshit, turned out to be the key to openin' the floodgates of emotions I'd kept pent up my whole life, and one little woman and managed to slip past my defenses and kick those gates wide-fuckin'-open. Whether or not she regretted that, I still wondered, since the result hadn't been pretty, but it'd helped.. a lot, surprisingly. I knew I'd been hidin' from her, but she made me so... I dunno, frustrated, I guess, that the harder she tried to get under my skin the angrier I got, til it finally erupted and I spilled my damn guts. I'd told her almost ever'thin' that night; 'bout my childhood, my years spent survivin' in Georgia's wilderness, Merle, all of it. Some of it was pretty bad and I almost didn't tell her, for fear of seein' disgust in her soft eyes, but she never judged me. She simply listened til I was spent, then just smiled.

I sniffled. I understood now why Maggie and Hershel were so protective of Beth. She was the light at the end of the tunnel in a world gone to hell.

My heart began to feel cold. I _had _to get her back. Somethin' had happened between us back there, at the dinnertable, before we'd heard the noise and I made the worst mistake of my life; somethin' intangible, but as plain as the nose on her face. She'd forced outta me the reason why I'd changed my mind 'bout good people, and even though I hadn't put anythin' into words, I knew from her soft, "Oh," that the look on my face had made it obvious enough. _She _was the reason. Her openness, trust, and innocence had affected me on a whole new level. The urge to protect her had become not just necessary, but instinctual; I realised with a gasp that I'd give my life to save hers, no questions asked.

This thought made me trip, and I went down, scraping my palms on the dewy pavement. It hurt, but I hardly noticed. _Was I...? _

Pickin' myself up, I hitched my crossbow higher over my shoulder and kept goin'. This train of thought was dangerous, I knew, but somehow I couldn't turn off my brain this time. The hand that felt like it was squeezin' my heart loosened minutely as I finally allowed myself to think it: I was pretty sure that I... maybe... _loved _her.

My gut flipped. Love was'nt somethin' I put stock in; to me it was like religion - ya could believe in it, but when push came to shove, it wouldn't put food in your gut or clothes on your back. Love was somethin' people who had nothin' better to do occupied their time with - and I'd always had somethin' better to do with my time, til now. Now... Now I didn't know what the fuck was goin' on inside me. This fear I felt was totally new, this fear for someone else's well-bein' besides my own. The fear that I would never see her again, and worst of all, the fear that I would never be able to atone for my mistake. It was imperative now that I get her back, no matter the cost. I _had _to - I owed it to her. Without actually doin' so, that girl had saved me.

I hadn't known it, but until this week, I had just been surviving this apocalypse. I mean, I'd made my first real friends, formed my first real family bonds, since, but I'd still been goin' through life with blinders on. Beth had stripped 'em from me, and what I saw scared me shitless. I'd been a total asshole, before. I'd been improving, sure, but I still had a long way to go. And I hadn't even known it. But she'd shown me that all the thin's I used to take for granted and scoff at as weak and stupid, really weren't stupid at all. That I had thought that I could go through life without acknowledgin' these thin's was makin' me weaker, in the long run. Beth was emotional and scared and 'bout as ferocious as a kitten, but in a lot of ways she could be so much stronger'n I was. It amazed me.

I lost track of time, stoppin' frequently to take breathers. The night began to fade from blackest black to charcoal to grey, and soon, the sun was risin'. My sweat-soaked face and body felt chilly as I reached a crossroad, and my gut felt like someone'd shoved a frozen blade into it. _Now which way do I go?_

A feeling of hopelessness washed over me, and, still breathin' hard, I dropped my most prized possession on the pavement like it was nothin' and sank to my knees, then my ass. Tears stung my eyes as I tried to force 'em back, the abject fear of bein' powerless taking over. _Now what should I do? _The only good thin' in my life was gone, and I had no hope of gettin' her back.

I don't know how long I sat there feelin' sorry for myself and feelin' like a piece of shit for fuckin' up my one responsibility. I didn't even hear 'em surround me, I was so deeply lost in my thoughts. If'n they'd been walkers... I wouldn't've fought them off. I would've let 'em feast on me 'cause it was what I deserved for lettin' her down.

I kept tellin' myself that, but self-preservation reared its ugly head as usual and when one of the strangers moved to snatch up my bow, I pulled it to me and lashed out with it, hittin' the offender in the nose and bringin' it up to center my sights on him as he stumbled to his ass. In my rage that someone would dare to interrupt my self-recrimination, I didn't even care that five others had their weapons trained on my head. All I could see was the asshole who'd tried to rob me, and I kept him sighted like my life depended on it.

The man started to laugh. I narrowed my eyes. _What the fuck?_

He called off the others, then explained why he'd tried to take my weapon. I remained silent and suspicious til he introduced himself as Joe. I looked in his eyes and couldn't detect any malice there, so I slowly lowered my weapon and replied with my name.

"Daryl."

He nodded. I glanced at the others. Joe asked, "You wanna join us? We sure could use another set of hands."

I didn't want to; if nothin' else, I only wanted to punish myself some more by mopin' alone, but I knew deep down that as soon as I'd come to that crossroad, all hope of findin' her had been lost. I was too far behind and had no idea which way to go. There was really nothin' else for me to do 'cept keep my eyes open for any signs of her in the area and keep movin'. I figured it may as well be with these guys, at least til I found my family again. I tried to maintain hope that that would happen soon, despite the mounting odds against it.

I chewed my lip. "Sure."

Joe smiled and introduced everyone else, then we moved west, toward the surrounding forest. I hung at the back of the group, not yet comfortable 'round all these new people. Joe dropped back to walk next to me when he noticed my reluctance.

"Rough day?"

His question made me look up. He pointed at my face. "I believe those're tears, son."

I rubbed my face roughly, angry that I'd been so deep in thought that I hadn't even realised I'd been cryin'.

"Ya could say that." My voice was crusty and uneven. I hated that he knew I'd been cryin'. I was a grown man for fuck's sake, and grown men didn't cry.

_Until their hearts're ripped out_, my mind whispered. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to ignore the tiny voice in my head that wouldn't let me hide from anythin'.

Joe shrugged and started to roll a cigarette. "Ain't nothin' to be 'shamed of, Daryl. We all lose someone who's got the power to break us, at some point."

I sniffed.

He went on. "I was a mess after my wife went. Still makes me misty to think of 'er." He glanced at me. "I don't think anyone else noticed, anyway, if'n ya were worryin' 'bout that."

I shook my head, pretendin' I didn't care. Inwardly I was relieved, though.

"So... Who was she?" Joe paused thoughtfully. "It was a she, yeah? I ain't got nothin' against ya if'n it was a he, but I wouldn't spread that around to the others, if'n I were you."

I shoved my hands in my pockets. I didn't know whether or not I could trust this group, but Joe didn't set off any alarms in my mind; I could smell an asshole a mile away and Joe didn't strike me as bein' one - yet. And despite myself, I wanted to talk 'bout Beth; I _needed _to. I wanted to tell him how great she was, but I wouldn't; that was for her ears only. I hated that it felt like she was dead, but by this point, she may very well be. That thought made me hurt in places I didn't know felt pain.

Reluctantly I told him. "Her name was Beth." I watched the grass disappear beneath my feet. "It was my job to look after her and I fucked up... She was taken from me." I felt hot tears brimmin', and I forced 'em back brutally. My hands were clenched so tight my nails dug bloody crescents into my palms.

"She was young, not yet twenty..." I stopped. He did too. I looked at him from under my ratty bangs, and the despair I heard in my voice made me cringe. "She was the best thin' that ever happened to me, and I fuckin' lost her."

Joe raised a brow. I stared at the ground and kicked a dirt clod. I felt a hand rest on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Daryl." He was quiet a moment. "We're lookin' for someone, ourselves... we could keep an eye out for this girl, too..."

For the first time in hours I felt a spark of hope. "Appreciate that."

Joe smiled and offered me a drag of his cigarette. It tasted great, and I took an extra puff before returnin' it. The nicotine calmed my nerves. He called ahead to the others as we reached the edge of the forest, "Hey! Gather 'round, gents."

We all stood 'round, Tony leaning heavily on his AK, waitin' for Joe to continue.

"Daryl here's lost a friend of his, a girl named Beth. Keep an eye out for her. Describe her, Daryl."

I cleared my throat, "She's short, blond, and wearin' a yellow polo shirt. Skinny as a stick. She's got a big bowie knife, or she did. It'd be hard to miss."

They all nodded slowly, and one, Len, rolled his eyes impatiently, but no one offered any other comments. Joe sighed. My gut tightened nervously.

"Well, let's keep goin', then. Catch us some lunch then make camp til tomorrow. We got some plannin' to do."

_Plannin'? _I thought. _For what?_

* * *

><p>I stared into the fire, watchin' the flames dance and pop, but I wasn't seein' 'em. I was seein' her face, flashing by my mind's eye like a torturous '30's picture show. The possum I'd caught earlier sat limp in my hands, half-skinned and abandoned as I'd become lost in memory.<p>

_Memory, hmph_. _Was there any better punishment than memory?_ When you'd fucked up as badly as I had, ya bet your ass ya ain't forgettin' it. In fact, the most painful memories become your best, and their sharp edges cut ya anew ever' time, 'cause ya come to want the pain. _Need _it. It's sick.

The knife I was usin' was clenched in my fist, my thumb absently coating the blade in my blood as I looked at the flames. Finally the sound of my name pulled me outta my daydream.

"Daryl."

Twitchin', my eyes becoming focused, I replied "Hm?"

Joe pointed at the possum. "You gonna eat that?"

I blinked, then averted my eyes, embarrassed to be caught unaware. "Yeah. Yeah."

He nodded. "Alright then." He sat down next to me, a tad too close for my comfort, but I forced myself not to shift away. "You're new here, so's I gotta lay down the laws. First: you Claim."

I raised a brow.

"Anythin' you catch or find, a place to sleep at night - you Claim it, and we'll all get along fine. Second: you steal, you keel. That one's pretty self-explanatory. And number Three: don't lie. Can you handle all that?"

I chewed my lip, but nodded. "Yeah, I think so."

Joe grinned. "Great. Now, as I was sayin' before, we're lookin' for someone, too. This _asshole _killed our friend Lou and left him to turn on us in an abandoned house a day or so back. We've been followin' his trail ever since, and he 'pears to have met up with two others. Now that we've found you, we out-number 'em two to one, and I like those odds."

Rubbing my split thumb, I asked, "What're ya gonna do when ya find 'em?"

Joe held my gaze without blinking. "An eye for an eye, son."

"Huh." I mumbled, thinkin' I'd better be gone 'fore they caught up with this guy's little group. Murder, even if it was justified, didn't feel right to me; it wasn't my fight, neither. That and the fact that it wouldn't be a fair fight at two to one, made up my mind. I'd slip away before thin's came to that. I had enough regret on my conscience, I didn't need this, too. Despite their offer to help me, I was thinkin' that I'd be better off on my own.

"Ya with us, Angelwings? Or are ya a pussy?" Len sneered.

My eyes narrowed, but I didn't rise to the bait. I glanced at Joe to see if he would say anythin', but he just watched me. I shrugged. "Maybe. I might be gone 'fore then, though."

The others, drawn by Len's question, drew nearer to listen.

Len snorted.

Joe said, "Whatta you mean, ya might be gone? We not good 'nough for ya, Daryl?"

Suddenly the tension in the air was thick. I knew I had to tread carefully here.

Finally, still rubbin' my thumb, I said, "I gotta keep my eye out for Beth. I'm with you guys for now, but when I find 'er, I'm gone. Besides, this isn't my fight, ya know? I appreciate you's takin' me in, and I'll abide by the rules and do my share of the work, but my stay ain't permanent."

Joe's lips twitched, and the silence stretched out. I saw the others exchangin' looks, some curious, some hungry, some miffed. But it was Joe's opinion that mattered the most.

Then he shrugged and said, "Fair 'nough." He got up and went 'bout his business, as if things were settled. I looked at my lap, suspicious that nothin' _felt _settled at all. I caught the others smirkin' at each other, and that reinforced my decision to leave as soon as possible.

* * *

><p>I had planned to steal away after dark that night, while the others were asleep. My impression of this rag-tag group of men was that of basic survival; if they ever found this guy they were lookin' for, I knew beyond a reasonable doubt that they wouldn't just kill him and move on. They would torture him. The thought made me shudder.<p>

_What would they do if we found Beth?_

It might be alright at first, but there was no way I could protect her from 'em, if they got it in mind that they wanted to have their fun with her. And they would; I'd overheard two of them reminiscin' before supper 'bout some woman they'd found a few weeks back. They'd shut up when they caught me listening to them, but I got the jist. Thin's clearly hadn't gone well for her. I vowed that I'd never let that happen to my Beth, and the only way to do that was to find her and try to locate the others from the Prison. I didn't care anymore that findin' her was probably hopeless; it was better'n hanging out with these guys just waitin' to be pounced on. I'd been around these types before. In a civilized world, the worst you'd get would be a good beatin', but now... they'd kill me and call it justice, just for disagreein' with their plan. I knew too much, now; I was a liability, and I knew it. I had no choice now but to go along with 'em or leave.

The fire was dying, and most of the men were snorin'. One was on sentry, but his back was turned away, keepin' an eye out for movement or sounds in the darkness that lurked outside our enclosure of barbed wire. My stuff was in my bag, and it was chilly enough now at night that sleepin' in all my clothes wasn't outta the ordinary.

I waited another hour. I saw the sentry start to sag forward; fallin' asleep. The others snored like saws. Now was my chance.

Gettin' silently to my knees, hoping the joints wouldn't pop, somethin' outside the fence caught my eye, somethin' that had caught the light as it moved from tree to tree in the dark. I frowned, and waited to see if it would reappear. The seconds ticked by, feelin' like years. I had no time to wait. If I was gonna slip out without attractin' notice, I had to go now. But some small part of me wanted to see, wanted to hope, that it was Beth out there waitin' for me.

A minute passed - a century to me. Nothin' happened. So I stood up and silently stalked to the fence, looked 'round one last time to be sure no one was watchin', turned to slip 'tween the wires, when-

"Daryl!"

The whisper nearly made me shit my pants. My heart tripped and I almost gave myself away by yellin' her name, but I clamped my mouth shut and froze. Behind me, someone rolled over and coughed. My eyes darted over the camp, then into the darkness where the whisper'd come from. Another minute passed 'fore I slowly bent over, slipped carefully through the wires, and straightened up again. Backin' slowly away, I whispered back, "Beth?"

I felt her small hands on my back, pullin' me into the darkness. My eyes never left the others til I was so far down the hill in the dark that I couldn't see 'em anymore.

Immediately I dropped my bag and turned 'round to gather her to me. Her arms were already 'round my chest, inside my coat, squeezing the air outta my lungs. I tucked her head beneath my chin and for several moments we just stood there. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my chest - she was safe, she was here, and my tears dropped freely into her dirty hair while she shook with silent sobs below me, her own hot tears warmin' a wet spot into my shirt.

"I'm sorry, Beth," I croaked, my voice raw with emotion. This was the weirdest thin' that had ever happened to me, bein' so open, but I was just so glad to see her alive that I didn't care if she saw. She peered up at me with wet eyes, her smile huge in the dim light from over the hill.

"I really missed you, Daryl," she whispered, and somethin' in me cracked. I smothered her face in my chest.

"I ain't never gonna let nothin' happen to ya again, darlin'. Ya hear me? Never."

I felt her happy laughter shake her body, makin' her sobs high-pitched, muffled under my coat. Her laughter curled my own lips briefly.

After a few moments I pushed her away gently. She wiped her nose with the back of her hand and made an apologetic face at me. I just smiled.

"C'mon. We gotta get away from here, now. Get your knife out, darlin'."

That was the second time the endearment'd dropped off my lips, but neither of us mentioned it. Somehow, it felt right to call her that. She was becoming very dear to me. In the back of my mind I knew that it was dangerous to form too close an attachment to Beth, 'cause our bond could be used against us by anyone with two good eyes - we were clearly very close, already. Being thus was a liability, but I had to accept that now. In order to protect her, I had to care. That was that, my instincts for self-preservation be damned. For the first time in ages, it wasn't just 'bout me anymore.

We began to quietly pick our way through the night. Our vision adjusted to the darkness quickly, and Beth stayed right on my ass the whole time; occasionally I felt her grab a handful of my jacket, then reluctantly let it go, as if to reassure herself that I was really there.

When the sun started to rise, I decided we'd hiked far enough. I kept my eye out for a shady spot to spend the day, one that anyone who followed us wouldn't easily find. I hadn't been coverin' our tracks, but when we reached a wide river, I knew now was the perfect time to start.

I stopped on the bank and took off my jacket, stuffin' it in my bag. Beth stood beside me, holdin' herself like she was cold. I frowned, but there was nothin' I could do for her right now. She was 'bout to get a lot colder.

"Gonna hafta get wet, Beth."

She sighed. Our eyes met. I smiled a little and punched her shoulder gently. "When we find a good spot to camp I'll build ya a fire. How's that?"

She smiled back. "Sounds great. Let's get this over with." She started to undress.

I followed suit. I tried not to look at her as I held open the garbage bag so she could throw her clothes in, followed by mine and the crossbow and our knives, but my eyes kept strayin'. She mumbled, "Too bad it's cold now, we should really wash these."

I shrugged and tied the bag shut. "Smell too clean and prey knows you're comin'. Smell gross - they sense nothin' amiss."

She tilted her head in thought. "Makes sense, I guess. Feels nasty, though."

I snorted, and started wading into the water. "Buck up, Bethy. Stay gross long enough, it becomes second nature. Hang on now, the current's stronger'n it looks."

I was in knee-deep, holdin' the bag in one hand and my other hand out to her on the bank. I shouldn't've looked back but I couldn't seem to help myself. Her arms were crossed but she dropped them to take my hand, and I had to force my eyes forward. _Damn _she was pretty.

Swallowin' hard, I pulled her after me, until the water was chest deep and her feet no longer touched the bottom. I hoped it didn't get much deeper.

I started to lead her downriver. She chirped, "Where are we g-going?!" The cold made her stutter a bit.

I was startin' to feel the cold myself. "We didn't cover our trail last night. It'll be an open book for anyone who knows what to look for. Our trail ends on that bank. This river's wide enough and fast enough that it'd be too much wasted effort tryin' to find where it picks up on the other side, but now we're gonna start coverin' our tracks. Couldn't help that in the dark, but it's daylight, and that stops now."

We were in the middle now, carefully weaving our way 'round some big rocks and small rapids. My grip on Beth's hand started to go numb.

She shivered. Teeth chattering, she said, "D-D-Daryl, I c-can't feel m-m-my legs-"

"I know," I cut her off. "We'll go ashore soon. I just wanna be sure."

"S-Sure of w-what?"

I looked back at her, her wet hair plastered to her head like a drowned rat, and a sudden jolt of heat bolted straight through my core, warmin' my innards. Even now, at her worst, she was beautiful. I blinked, and turned away again to watch where I was goin'.

"That none of those assholes follows us."

Ten minutes later I hauled her ashore, her numb, naked body shivering uncontrollably. The sun was warm now but the air was still cool, and the water'd been frigid. I dug out my only blanket and threw it over her, rubbin' down her body in an attempt to warm her up. I couldn't afford to lose her to hypothermia; I'd just gotten her back, and I'd made a promise. I _always _kept my promises.

Eventually she warmed up enough to ask, "Do you mean those men from your camp?"

I sat back next to her, nodding. "Yeah. " I dumped the bag and piled her still-dry clothes near her, then took mine and turned my back to put 'em on.

When I turned 'round again she was starin' at the ground, but her cheeks were stained pink. That made me smirk.

"Like what ya saw?" I crouched next to her. Her face got pinker. It was adorable. I blinked. _Adorable? _Had I _ever _thought that about anythin' 'fore? _It was so unlike me_... I shook my head.

She pursed her lips in a hard attempt not to smile sheepishly, and almost pulled it off, too. She held onto the blanket as she sat up and replied cattily, "I don't know what you're talking about."

I snorted. "Do too. Your pink cheeks gave ya away."

She glared at me but couldn't stop her lips from curling guiltily. She let out a huff. "Fine. You got a nice ass. A really nice, really fine, damn nice ass. Happy?" She crossed her arms resolutely and jerked her gaze away.

I laughed. "That'll do, darlin'. Come on." I reached for the blanket, but she slapped my hand. I frowned.

"Oh no you don't, Dixon! You'll turn your back like a decent man should-"

"-I ain't gonna gawk at ya. I'm gonna hold it up so's ya can get dressed behind it."

She sat there with her finger pointed and her mouth hangin' open. I raised a brow and gently closed her jaw with my fingers. "I _am _a decent man, Beth. Don't ever say I ain't, again."

Without another word she stood and held up the blanket so I could take it. I held it so she couldn't see the chagrin on my face_. Is that what she thought of me? Did she __**still **__think I was that kind of man? _

I'd asked her that once before, during _I Never_. It'd made me feel like trash that she thought I'd been in jail. I felt like trash now 'cause she thought I'd try to take advantage of her. The longer I thought 'bout it, the madder I got.

"I'm done," she whispered, and I folded the blanket and stowed it without lookin' at her. I picked it up and started to walk away when she said, "I'm sorry, Daryl."

I stopped, clenching my jaw. Turning quickly, I walked back to her and stuck my finger in her face.

"Don't _ever _do that again. Ya hear me? Don't ever act like I'd do somethin' as low-down as takin' advantage of a woman. I ain't never taken anythin' that wasn't offered freely, and I ain't gonna start now. I ain't no white-trash, shitbag rapist, so don't make me out as one. Ya got that, _Miss Perfect_?"

Her face looked stricken, shocked that I'd blown up like that. I could feel a headache comin' on behind my eyes, and my face felt hot. My anger slowly drained away as we stood there staring at each other, my panting the only noise between us.

A tear leaked out and her face softened, and I could see the regret and shame in her eyes. Made me feel like shit, but I squared my shoulders and met her gaze head on. If we were gonna travel together, showin' me some respect was somethin' she was gonna hafta learn to do.

"Daryl, I... Please, forgive me." She slowly approached me, her hands up in defeat. My breaths slowed, and I allowed her to get close. She clutched the lapels of my jacket tightly and buried her face in my chest, her shoulders shakin' with sobs. My frown fell slack. _Guess I'd scared her a little more'n I'd intended_.

She was cryin' into my chest, "I'm sorry I implied you weren't a decent man... I was an asshole, I know you're a good man, please, Daryl, _please _forgive me-"

"Alright, alright," I said gruffly, patting her back. All this bawlin' was makin' me uncomfortable.

She backed up a touch and looked at me. "I know you'd never do that, Daryl. It was stupid of me to even mention it. Do you really mean it?"

I nodded, those doe eyes meltin' me like butter. "Yeah, you're forgiven, darlin'. Just don't do it again." I playfully flicked her nose. Her smile was beautiful.

"Come on," I stepped away ostensibly, putting some much-needed distance between us. Her closeness had made me completely forget my chills. "We got ground to cover. Mind where ya step from now on. Follow me exactly, ya got that?"

She nodded and saluted. "Yes, sir! Lead the way, sir!"

I smirked. "Cut that shit out, ya goofball. This way."

* * *

><p>Our landin' on shore'd been in a rocky spot, which was already dryin' when we left it behind, so any evidence that we'd been there at all should evaporate quickly. The area was sparsely covered in bushes and weeds, as shorelines tend to be, with the ever-present rocks litterin' the ground underfoot. I led Beth along a shallow tributary of the river for an hour or more, 'cause there was very little damage we could do to be left behind for anyone to track. I tried to make sure she stepped in no mud, but when she did, I sent her out into the current til it was gone. She quickly learned to avoid steppin' in any more mud after that.<p>

I smiled to myself, feelin' safe to do so 'cause I was in the lead and she couldn't see my face. It was a great feelin' to have her back again. Thin's 'tween us felt easy, smooth, natural. We could banter and reminisce and joke without feelin' awkward. Well, usually. Every now and then one of us'd say somethin' loaded with intent, but we always managed to laugh it off. With the men, I'd never felt so free. That... And they weren't near as much fun to tease.

Just the thought of them followin' us made me feel cold with dread. Tense. After listenin' to them calmly inform me of their plans for the man who'd gotten away and talkin' 'bout that woman they'd found, I knew I couldn't trust them 'round Beth. It was my job to make sure she never came even remotely close to people like them, so I cringed a bit when I barked a bit too sharply over my shoulder, "Pick it up, woman! We ain't got all day!" But I didn't apologise for it. Her safety was more important than her feeling' right now.

As soon as the words left my mouth, I saw the walker, and wanted to kick myself. It was caught in a deadfall fifty feet downstream, but when it saw us it renewed its' struggle to free itself.

I held up my hand, and Beth stopped just short of pokin' the back of my neck with her nose. I hoisted my bow up as we slowly approached, tellin' her to keep an eye on our tail, in case this walker had friends.

Her hands gripped my jacket tightly. If I didn't have danger to protect her from, I'd be shakin' my head and teasin' her.

"How do you think it got stuck in there?" She asked, voice low. The walker was makin' quite a racket, despite bein' in terrible shape. It was sketally thin, almost hairless, its' lips and eyelids rotted away. It knashed it's cracked, dirty teeth together hungrily.

I shrugged, the bow rising as I did so. "Dunno. Maybe it got caught in a flash flood." Arms flailed, branches shook, but it was stuck fast.

We stopped ten feet away, and I lowered my bow, scannin' the surrounding area for others, but we were alone. No friends for this ugly bastard.

Beth moved past me a bit and stared at it sadly. I chewed my lip, impatient to be on our way, but I waited. If she had somethin' to get off her chest, I could respect that.

Her hand came up to cover her mouth, and for the third time since we'd reunited, tears began to flow down her cheeks. I reached out to touch her, but she jerked away from my hand. I dropped it.

"Kill it," she whispered brokenly, turning her head and lookin' at me with eyes that looked like two burnt holes in her face. "Please, Daryl... Just kill it."

I lifted the bow and aimed. Pulled the trigger. Waded into the deadfall to retrieve my bolt. When I came back, she'd wiped her eyes and collected her wits.

Reaching out, I brushed her cheek with my thumb. This time she didn't pull away. "Ya alright now?"

She nodded. "Yeah. Sometimes I just... feel for them, you know? For who they used to be. Once that's gone, you can't ever get it back." Her eyes came up to meet mine. "It just hurts. In my chest. I didn't know him, but... He probably used to be loved."

I turned to look at the limp, quiet corpse, and wondered what it must be like to feel so damn much compassion for somethin' that would eat my guts given half a chance. I looked at the sky before openin' my mouth again.

"Ya can't think like that."

I felt, rather'n saw, her eyes whip to my face. "What?"

I turned to her, my face blank. "Ya can't think of 'em like people anymore. They're dead. Ain't nothin' ya can do for 'em, 'cept end their sufferin'. They _used _to be people, but they ain't no more. Now they're just... hungry. They don't care whether or not ya feel sorry for 'em. They got no compassion. If you're gonna be compassionate, ya should save it for the livin'." I turned away, to see if there was a way around the deadfall without leaving any traces behind.

While I was lookin', I heard her sob quietly, and berated myself. Perhaps I was bein' too pragmatic, but I meant ever' word I'd said. I admired Beth her boundless compassion, but sometimes, at the worst times, it got in the way, and if'n she wasn't careful, it'd get her killed. I couldn't allow that. So... She had to learn to tighten it up, damn it. At least til I'd found a safer place for her.

Finally I found a hole in the branches we could slip through. Taking one last look 'round, I called, "C'mon."

She came, slowly, her arms crossed like she was cold but we were both sweating now with the heat of brisk travel so I knew she wasn't cold, she was angry. Well, if her anger was what I got for keepin' her safe, so be it. It wasn't like I hadn't suffered through it 'fore. At least she wasn't bein' a brat 'bout it this time.

I held up a heavy branch for her to duck under, but she wouldn't meet my eyes as she passed. Shrugging, I slipped underneath and followed after her.

We emerged with a few scratches, and only one snapped twig, which I'd broken off and discarded. I had to admit, so far, we were leaving nothin' to suggest we'd been here, and it made me feel better knowin' it.

"Where to now?" She asked dully, arms hanging at her sides. I pulled in a silent breath and wished for a cigarette. _Fact, I'd trade my left nut for just **one** drag_-

"Look, Beth..." I spread my hands, not sure what I was tryin' to say, and slightly frustrated that I couldn't seem to spit it out. Droppin' 'em, I rubbed the back of my neck, and finally just took her in my arms, clutching her stiff body close to mine.

After a moment she relaxed, and I felt her arms slide up my back and clasp in the middle. I smiled a bit. We were gettin' downright cozy, she and I. I rested my chin on her head and breathed in her scent. She might think she was filthy, but to me, she smelled like a woman, pure and simple. It made my blood hot in my veins, and I felt gooseflesh fan out to cover my entire body.

Awkwardly, I let her go, but the sly look in her eye told me she was suspicious of me. I shook off her intoxicating smell and cracked my neck. She made a disgusted face. _Now that was more like it._

"Let's go. We got a few more hours before dark to find a hideout, eat, and dry out our shoes. Time to split."

* * *

><p>Three hours later, we finally found a suitable place to hide for the night. It was hidden behind a thick stand of thorny raspberry bushes. It was small and cramped, but it was dry and when I got the fire goin', warm. I pulled out what remained of the possum I'd killed yesterday for dinner, and I heard Beth sigh forlornly at the prospect of eating it, but when I looked at her to suggest she quit her damn bitchin', my irritated words died on my tongue.<p>

She sat cross-legged, the blanket draped over her shoulders, her knife drawing doodles in the dirt. She watched the knife blade throw reflections from the flames as she wrote _Daddy _in the dust, then drew a heart 'round it. As I watched, she dug in deep and put a big crack through it.

I looked away. She was missin' Hershel. Hell, I missed him too, sometimes. He was the voice of reason for our group, our source of experience, and the closest thin' to a doc we had. He wasn't always right, but he was a man who ruled with his heart, not his mind. If somethin' felt wrong to Hershel, by God, he'd let ya know it. He could be a pushy old codger, but the man had had him a set of brass balls, I tell ya what. A tougher sonofabitch I'd never met.

Hershel was the kind of man I hoped to grow old enough to be. He'd had his stubborn moments, but like ever'one else, he eventually saw reason. His advice was always spot-on, whether ya agreed at the time or not. And he was a good father. Hershel Greene, despite his terrible end, had been a great and respected man.

Beth's soft voice interrupted my train of thought.

"I miss you, Daddy." She brought up her legs and rested her arms across her knees, her forehead leaning atop her arms. She looked miserable.

Chewin' my lip, I frowned a little. Perhaps I'd not thought thin's through completely when I'd made the decision to be Beth's keeper. It was proving to be much harder'n I'd thought to keep her safe _and _happy. She was certainly safe, but happy? Hardly. I scratched my head, probing my mind for the right thin' to say to cheer her up; I'd been screwing up on that score all day by just blurtin' out whatever came to mind.

It occurred to me that I could say nothin' and hope she got over her mood herself, but that seemed heartless to me. I heaved a sigh. I had no idea what the hell I could possibly say to make her feel better, but I couldn't call myself a man if'n I didn't at least try.

I popped a chunk of possum meat in my mouth and got up to offer her a bite. She shook her head, refusing, so I sat down next to her and stared at the fire while I contemplated what to say. I chewed for a long time before I swallowed and leaned back on my arms, stretchin' out my legs and crossin' 'em at the ankle. She hadn't moved at all. I didn't blame her for refusin' the possum; needed barbeque sauce or somethin' to make it a tad more edible than it was. Even salt woulda made a diff'rence.

I decided that I may as well remain true to form and blurt out whatever came to mind, and hope for the best.

"He was a great man, Beth."

She shifted a little. I flicked my eyes back to the fire and went on.

"A little stubborn maybe, but then again doc's usually are. Think they know ever'thin' 'bout ever'one. Busybodies, really, s'what they are. Worse'n a buncha old hens pickin' apart a rebellious youngster. Hmph. Never did meet me a doc who weren't a damn know-it-all, anyway."

I cracked an eye in her direction. Her glare over her arms was hot.

_Good_, I thought, _just a little more_...

"'Course ya could hardly fault him, livin' with all these damn women. I could never tell who was more bull-headed: him, or that sister of yours. Was your Mama stubborn? 'Cause damn, that girl'd cut off her nose to spite her face, if'n ya ask me. Ya can lead a horse to water, but ya sure as hell can't make 'er drink. Hershel, he was the same fuckin' way-"

I was prepared when she flew at me, her rage burnin' in her eyes. Her weight bore me backwards onto the ground, and I pretended to struggle with her for a minute before I took control and rolled us so she was pinned beneath me, her struggles to get free futile under my heavier weight. She spat and kicked, to no avail. She tried to scratch me and I pinned her arms rather hard, havin' had enough of that shit, and she hissed, "Take it back!"

I leaned close to her face and calmy replied, "Nope."

She thrashed, angrier than a scalded cat. I held her.

"I said take it back! Right fuckin' _now_, Daryl!"

I covered her mouth with my palm and whispered, "Shh, Bethy, keep it down. Ya don't wanna attract any unwanted attention, do ya?"

She breathed heavily through her nose. With great effort, she slowly shook her head. I eased up on her mouth.

"Now, take some more deep breaths... 'Atta girl. Feel the blood rushin' 'round in your veins? Your heart poundin'? Ya know what that is? That's life, darlin'. That's how ya know you're still alive. That rush of adrenaline is exactly what causes people to do dumb shit, like attack a friend. But sometimes, it gives ya the strength ya need to fight for your life, like you're doin' now. I knew that fiesty woman was still in there somewhere. Now, quit feelin' sorry for yourself and pull up your big girl panties, honey. I know life stinks now, but it can get a whole lot worse, and don't ya forget it. You've got ol' Daryl lookin' after ya now, and I don't much cotton to miserable women, so hurry up and snap outta it, 'fore I'm forced to use drastic measures."

At this point I was so close to her face I could feel the air from her nose drying my lips. I patted her cheek and got off of her before she could feel just how much my blood was rushin' 'round down south.

She sat up slowly and took the possum meat from me without a word, chewing it thoughtfully as she rubbed her wrists. I picked up the knife she'd dropped in her haste to tackle me and jammed it into the nearest log where I could keep an eye on it. Then I kicked out the fire and crawled into the tiny cave, my feet stickin' out. I propped up my head with my arm and rested the other over my gut, closing my eyes. If anythin' approached us, the bushes rattlin' would wake us in plenty of time to defend ourselves, but I wasn't too concerned. We'd seen one walker all day, and we were deep in Georgia back-country now; if'n there was another person within ten miles of us I'd eat my hat.

Eventually she crawled in beside me and snuggled deep into the only blanket. I listened to her breathin' even out and was almost asleep myself when her voice snapped my eyes wide open.

"You didn't mean a damn word of that, did you."

I snorted softly. "Sure I did. But not 'bout them."

She rolled, but I couldn't see her in the dark. "Thanks, Daryl."

I closed my eyes again. "Hmm. Go to sleep, darlin'."

She scootched over until she was nestled snugly into my side, and threw some blanket over me.

"Good night, Daryl. Sweet dreams."

I grunted, and wrapped my arm around her shoulder. She melted into me. I smiled in the dark, because for the first time in a long while, I was completely happy. _And why not? _Beth wouldn't see it.

I felt her lips on my scruffy cheek, pecking me in the dark. I stiffened. She waited.

"Please, don't..." she whispered, trailin' off, resting her palm on my chest. I didn't move.

"Don't, what?"

After a long moment in which she seemed to wrestle with her thoughts, she spoke. "Don't pull away. I couldn't bear it if... Well, I need you, Daryl. Please don't leave me."

I relaxed a bit. _Comfort, I can give_. Somethin' else... this wasn't the time for that. _Not yet._

Pullin' her closer, I replied, "I won't, Bethy. I'm here for the long haul."

She sighed, and burrowed her head into my armpit. A moment later, her breaths became shallow and even with sleep.

My mind, unfortunately, took a mite longer to shut up.

* * *

><p>I barely slept, but I don't sleep well, anyway. Haven't for years.<p>

Anyhow, I was up with the birds and huntin' us some rabbit for breakfast, and by the time the sun was rising over the trees I had three skinned, spitted, and roastin' over a small fire. I'd also collected a shirt-full of raspberries, since the bushes 'round us were loaded with the last crop of the season, to tide us over til the rabbits were done. I would've gladly eaten them bunnies raw but I knew Beth couldn't do that; her stomach wasn't conditioned to digestin' raw meat like mine was. I didn't mind the extra effort of cookin' it, though - I liked the taste of cooked meat better, anyway.

Beth finally crawled out of the cave, her eyes crusty and her hair wildly stickin' out in all directions. She looked like she'd stuck her finger in a socket.

I kinda snorted at her hair and she yawned. "What's so funny?"

I put down the skin I was scraping and pointed at her head with the knife. "Nice 'fro there, honey."

She reached up to touch it, then glared at me. "Shut up. At least I have hair!" She began to comb her fingers through it, without much success. It was too knotted.

I sniffed, offended. "I beg your pardon?"

She smirked. "You heard me."

"Uh huh. Then I guess I'll just eat these here rabbits all by m'self, and the berries, too. Ya can find your own goddamn breakfast."

Her movements stopped. She sniffed. "Is that delicious aroma really rabbit?"

"Yeah. Not that you're gettin' any."

She shuffled closer to me and leaned into my side, stickin' out her lower lip and poutin' cutely. "Aww, come on, Daryl, don't be like that... I think you have awesome hair!"

I raised a brow at her. She grinned, bitin' her lip a little.

Shaking my head, I replied, "Not buyin' it, baby girl. Ya gonna hafta try a lot harder'n that to melt this cold heart."

She lowered her eyes, thinkin'. After a few minutes, she stood up, and went behind a nearby bush. I went back to scraping the rabbit skin. About fifteen minutes passed before I finally called, "Ya still alive over there?"

Beth grunted. "Yeah, I'm fine. For fuck's sake."

I stopped what I was doin' again. "What was that?"

"Nothing! Nothing you can fix, anyway."

I'd had enough of this damn suspense. Somethin' wasn't right, but she wouldn't tell me? _What the fuck was she doin' over there?!_

Dropping the skin and my knife, I got up and started to walk 'round the bushes lookin' for her. "Where the hell are ya?"

She screeched, "Don't! Don't come over here!"

I sighed loudly. "Why the fuck not? The hell's the problem?"

There was a pause. Finally, she said low, "I have my period, okay? I didn't know it was coming-"

"'Nough said." I spun right 'round and headed back to what I was doin'. No way was I gettin' involved in _that_. Or so I thought.

"Wait! Daryl! I'm sorry! Just gimme a minute... Oh, shit!"

Sounded like a real circus back there. _Step right up for a heapin' dose of Awkward, folks!_ I rolled my eyes. "_Now _what?"

She replied, "Do we have like, a rag, or something? I need to wash these."

I was afraid I knew what "these" were and that the only spare scrap of cloth besides the blanket was restin' under my ass cheek, presently. _My only rag... Shit_.

She was still talking. "How far away was the river again? Ugh, this is so typical! Stupid body!"

I stood up again and waved my hands placatingly, even though she couldn't see it. "Alright, alright! I'm goin' to get ya some water. Just... stay near the cave, and don't make any more noise." I had no idea what I'd bring water back in, but figured I'd look for some discarded plastic or somethin' on the way.

"Umm, ok."

I threw my only rag at her when I passed her bush. "Here. May as well keep this."

I heard a muffled, "Thank you!"

"Yeah, yeah. Ya owe me a new rag."

"What?! A new rag? Where the hell am I gonna find a new..." Her voice trailed off as I moved away.

I trudged through the grass back to a small spring we'd passed after leavin' the creek behind yesterday, keepin' my eyes out for walkers and somethin' to carry the water in. Reachin' the spring, I'd had no luck findin' a container. Narrowing my eyes, I scanned my surroundings. _Weed, weed, cotton plant, weed... Ugh_. _Whose idea was it to look after her again?!_

_If she were pregnant we wouldn't have to put up with this crap_.

I blinked. The errant thought flickered past before the censor in my head could approve it, and my gut flipped over. As true as the thought may be, it still felt, well... awkward.

Beth and I were close; we spent all our time together, and sometimes our conversations got kinda sexual, I guess, sorta. I shook my head. She was too young to be interested in an old fart like me. If anythin', she probably viewed me as another father-figure, though I had a lot of trouble thinkin' of her as a daughter. I'd never had one, so it didn't come natural to me. I was more accustomed to lovers, even though they were far and few between. My brother had been the ladies' man, not me, but I'd had my share of partners. It'd been so long since the last one, though, I couldn't even remember her face.

I absently began to pick cotton bolls as I searched for somethin', anythin', to hold water and allowed my thoughts to keep wandering.

Beth was my purpose now, until we found the others - _if _we found them - so we could potentially be spendin' a lot of time together. A mental image of her, naked on the shore, floated into my head and stayed there, and perversely I let it. I closed my eyes and tried to remember ever' detail, but it was hard, my glimpse had been so brief. Regardless, it was enough to make _me _hard. I raised a brow, wonderin' if I had time to take care of a little business before I went back...? I shrugged. _Why not? It would certainly improve my mood. _And besides, I sometimes got my best ideas while I was "takin' care of business", so, stuffin' my handfuls of accumulated cotton in my pockets, I took another look 'round, then crouched behind a rock, my zipper _zing_in' in my haste to get this done.

As I got goin', I thought of how awkward it would be if anyone caught me, and I snickered. I could just imagine the look on Beth's face, too. That made me laugh even harder. I covered my mouth with my free hand to muffle the sounds I was makin', since whenever I did this in the past I wasn't exactly quiet.

After ten minutes I was close, a few more strokes would do me, and as I crept over the edge her image popped up in my mind once more, only she was beneath me, writhing in ecstasy, and screamin' for me to keep goin'. Grunting softly, I came hard, holdin' my breath to stifle my harsh gasps. Closing my eyes, I savoured the orgasm, thinkin' that it had been _far _too long since I'd indulged in a little Daryl-time, and that next time I wouldn't leave it go so long.

Opening my eyes, I zipped up and glanced back at the spring, somethin' white catching my eye. I picked my way to it, and pulled a small, cracked plastic bucket out of the mud. It looked 'bout a billion years old, but if I could line it, it would be serviceable.

Lookin' down, I decided that I could jam the crack with the only water-proof thin' I had - my leather vest. Sighing, I ripped a strip from the bottom hem, stuffed it into the crack, and filled it at the spring. It leaked a little, but it held. It was the best I could do aside from literally leadin' her here to bathe and clean herself up, which, I figured, I'd probably end up doin'.

Heading back to camp, I got to wonderin' just exactly how Beth had managed to find me two nights ago. _Where'd she been? How'd she gotten away? _

I felt like a tool for not askin' her before now; she probably thought I didn't care. Truth was, I'd just been so happy to see her, I'd forgotten all about askin' what'd happened. I made a mental note to ask her when I got back to camp.

Approaching our campsite, I whistled low and long. She answered with her own whistle, and I wound my way through the bushes to the one I'd left her behind.

"Got your water-"

"Holy hell, took you long enough!" She jerked the bucket out of my hands, the thorns scratching me as I held it out to her. She started mumbling somethin' incoherent to me when I suddenly heard, "What's in your pocket?!"

At first I thought, _Oh shit, I still got a hard-on_, but she'd already reached through the bush again and shoved her hand deep into my pants. I made a face and jumped a bit when she brushed my dick in her effort to pull out a fist-full of the cotton I'd stuffed in there.

"What is thi- Cotton? Where did you find cotton?"

I shrugged. "Near the spring."

She gasped. "This is perfect! I can totally use this! Got any more?"

I emptied my other pocket into her hand. She giggled. I smiled a bit. _Jeez, guess I shoulda picked more._

"Ya gonna be alright now?"

"Yeah, I think so. Thanks, Daryl, you're a lifesaver."

Stuffing my hands into my empty pockets I replied, "I have my moments." I started to walk away, hopin' that burnt smell didn't mean the rabbits were charred beyond recognition, when somethin' hard on my back forced me to the ground, snarling in my ear.

Panicking, I tried to reach for my bow, but I'd left it back by the fire, and there was no way I'd get to it before the hungry walker pinnin' me down could take a bite. My knife was under me, unreachable until I could roll over; all I could do was try to avoid its teeth and nails and yell, "Beth! Get your ass out here now! _Now_! Hurry up!"

I couldn't hear anythin' aside from the loud snarls in my ear, the walker snappin' its' teeth at me as I thrashed and bucked, tryin' to throw it off. Suddenly I was covered in black gunk, and all was silent again.

The weight was lifted from my back, and I rolled away, tryin' to see if it was dead, but what I saw was Beth, sittin' on the ground with the walker in her lap, her hand bloody from the knife she'd lodged in it's brain. Gore oozed down onto her fingers and arm, but she didn't seem to notice. Through her gasps, she asked, "Did it bite you?"

I lay there in the grass, prone on one elbow, and the world seemed very slow. I reached up to feel my head and neck, but ever'thin' was where it was 'sposed to be. My arm dropped and we stared at each other.

"I'm fine," I whispered. _Holy shit_. I'd _never _been totally ambushed like that before. Ever. I knew better'n to let my guard down, especially now. Yet the damn thin' had still gotten the drop on me. I looked at my hands. They were shaking.

Beth exhaled loudly. "Thank God. For a minute there I thought I was too late."

I got to my feet, wobbly. The adrenaline was coursing full speed, but that didn't blot out the fear that still knotted my gut. I leaned down to pull the dead woman off of her.

"For a minute there, so'd I." I held out my hand to pull her up. She took it, and I hauled her upright - painfully aware that she was bare from the waist down, pressed against me hard. I could feel her heart poundin' next to mine.

Despite the almost painful urge to look down at her face, I doggedly stared at a tree over her head, grippin' her in my arms as if I'd never let go, until she whispered huskily, "Daryl..."

My self-control shattered.

Our eyes met, and she wrapped her arms 'round my neck. She lunged with her legs and I stood there while she settled herself on my hips, my hands slippin' 'hind her thighs to keep her from falling. Her mouth was on mine and the onslaught was too much. She was damp under my palms with sweat, and we were both quickly aware of my reaction to _that _thought.

"Beth-" I mumbled between breaths, "Beth, honey, slow down."

She drew back, her lips swollen and pink from kissing me. The moisture shining there sent a bolt of white-hot heat through my core, but I held myself back.

"What is it? Oh." She looked at my chest, embarrassed. "You don't want me like that."

She tried to let go of me but I held her fast, not willing to budge an inch. I'd thought she'd not want _me_, and she thought_... _

_ I'm a fuckin' moron_.

"No... S'not it."

Beth's eyes drew back up to mine. "I'm confused... The other night, at the table...?"

I knew what she was askin'. She wanted to know if I'd felt it too: the tension that'd been buildin' 'tween us all week, the tension that'd been shattered by the noise outside and my careless mistake that almost cost her her life. I'd felt it alright, but could I tell her that? I mean, I'd just fantasised about her ten minutes ago while I reamed myself raw, but that wasn't the same as this. This was the real thin', this was her, tellin' me that she wanted me, and I was hesitating.

I realised that what was happenin' between us was inevitable. I couldn't care 'bout a woman as much as I cared 'bout her and _not _take things to the next level. I'd thought I could, but clearly I was wrong. Oddly, I felt slightly disappointed in myself for failin' to keep her at arm's length. I'd always kept women at a distance, never fully openin' myself up to them, because if I'd learned anythin' in my life, it was that people leave, and they hurt ya. For a long time I'd never allowed anyone to get that close, but Beth had snuck in under my safety net and I hadn't even known it. She'd made herself necessary to me in a way that I'd never fully understand, but needed, regardless. She brought out the honourable in me. I knew then without askin' that she could be trusted with my fragile heart. _Because she wanted me_. It was like bein' told I'd won the lottery, my brother wasn't really dead, and the apocalypse'd never happened, all rolled into one.

"Yeah," was all I could force past my flummoxed lips.

Her eyes widened. "Really? I thought I'd imagined it, considering all the fighting we've been doing lately." She bit her lip. "All I could think about in that trunk was getting back to you, you know that? I never told you because I thought you'd snort and tell me to grow up, but... It's true. Your voice in my head, prodding me on - that was what got me through, Daryl. _You_. You saved me, and you weren't even there."

Tears welled in her eyes and brimmed over to splatter down her smilin' cheeks. Releasing one of her thighs, I put my hand behind her head and drew it under my chin. My eyes were startin' to sting.

"I vowed if I ever found ya again, I'd never let ya go, darlin'," I whispered, "No matter what." I breathed deeply, tryin' to memorise the feelin' of her warmth pressed to me. "I'd die for ya, Beth."

She gasped. I held her tighter. Her arms snaked around my neck again, and she pulled away enough to rest her mouth gently on mine.

"I love you, Daryl."

* * *

><p>Time seemed to blur. When I came to myself again, we were sittin' on the ground, she in my lap, moulded so closely together we could've been mistaken for a two-headed freak. My lips were chapped from all the kissin', but I didn't care. We both wanted to finish what we'd started, but we couldn't do that here; we were too exposed. That, and, well... You know.<p>

"Get dressed," I said, remembering that she'd been half-naked the whole time. She remembered, too.

Jumping up, she gasped, "Oh my God, Daryl, I'm so sorry..."

I looked down, and my pants were dotted here and there with small, dark stains. I wrinkled my nose. Well... I'd definately had worse thin's stain my pants. I pulled up some grass to wipe them off.

"Forget it." I stood, stiffly. "Go get cleaned up before we attract another friend with your scent."

She froze. "My scent? You mean-?"

I nodded. "Yeah. They can smell your blood."

She made a face. "Ew. As if this day hasn't been gross enough." She trudged back to her bush to find her pants. I chuckled.

"Here, use these." I tossed the scraped rabbit skins at her. "Think that and the cotton will hold ya for a few hours til we find us a house?"

She nodded. "Should."

"Good. Git 'er done, then we'll skedaddle." Our fire had burned out, leaving the rabbits if not burnt, then very well-done. I salvaged them and the raspberries that didn't get crushed in all the panic of the walker's attack, and stored it all in my shirttail. Slingin' on my bow, pulling Beth's knife outta the walker and wipin' it off in the grass, then, grabbin' up the bag, I was ready to go.

A few moments later Beth emerged with the empty water bucket, slightly mussed-lookin' and very blood-stained, but ready.

I tilted my head. "Let's go."

* * *

><p>"I'd <em>kill <em>for a tamp."

I sighed. _Was it wrong to wish to be put out of my misery via random lightenin' bolt? If only... _

"Ya said that already," I reminded her, holding up two fingers. "Twice."

"I know! Ugh! _Why _is it so hot?" Her whiny voice carried through the empty field we were crossing. Old, sun-fried bean plants crunched and crackled under our shoes. I felt rather exposed out here so I picked up the pace til we were almost runnin'.

"Keep your voice down. You're practically ringin' the dinner bell as it is, don't make us any more obvious, please."

She gasped behind me. "Holy crap, did you just say _please_? I'm shocked _and _appalled."

Mildly I replied, "Shut the hell up, woman. Ya steppin' where I am?"

"I'm trying to, but it's hard when I'm all but up your butt, _Senor Slowpoke_."

I smirked. "Just don't trip, _pumpkin_. I ain't haulin' your pretty ass all over hell's half acre, _again, _lookin' for "tamps", alright? Someone's gotta make sure we leave little to no tracks 'hind us."

I hoped she wouldn't think of the mess we'd left behind at the cave that clearly bespoke of at least two occupants, one of them clearly female. I'd tried to muck it all up as best I could with what little water was left in the bucket and a pine bough, but unless it rained soon, that was all I could do.

To distract Beth, who, I knew, would start whinin' again if I didn't get her mind off the heat, I remarked, "Ya never told me what happened that night."

There was a silence, the only sounds our crunching feet and the drone of cicadas and grasshoppers sawin' the air.

Finally, she responded between puffs, "I didn't see who they were, at first. They threw me in the trunk so fast I didn't have time to come up with a plan, but they made one fatal mistake."

"How's that?"

She snorted, and I could hear the grim amusement in her voice. "They didn't take my knife."

I nodded. "Alright. Then what?"

She shrugged, "They drove forever, it seemed. When they finally stopped, I pulled my knife, and as soon as they opened the trunk, I kicked up the lid and swung out with the blade. Caught one in the gut." She hiccupped. "Got lucky and nailed the other in the balls with the toe of my boot. Then I stole their keys while they were down and took their car."

I smiled. _What a woman_.

Sounding bored on purpose to tease her, I said, "S'that all?"

She reacted true to form. "That's what you have to say? _"That's all?" _Excuse me, Fearless Leader, but who found whom? Huh? That's right. I found _you_. So you see, you can't make fun of me anymore 'cause I can survive on my own now and-ow!"

I snorted louder than I meant to when she stumbled into my back; I stopped joggin' and turned 'round to steady her. My shoulders shook with laughter as she glared furiously into my face.

"What? Stop fucking laughing!"

I wiped my nose to hide my grin. "Are ya gonna be alright there, Calamity Jane? Gotta watch out for them gopher holes." I bent over to gently squeeze her already-tender ankle.

She flinched, her hand resting on my back for balance. "I'm _fine_."

I straightened. "Good. Don't trip again." I took off, slower this time. I looked back every now and then, just to be sure. I doubted we were bein' followed, but one could never be too cautious.

Ten minutes after that we came to a dirt road, and about a half mile south I could see a white house shimmering in the heat, a big red barn behind it, and a few smaller buildings. I pointed. "There."

She sagged when she saw how far away it was. "Awww, man." Rubbed sweat off her forehead. "This _blows_."

"That ain't what ya said last night, _toots_." I winked.

Beth made an unimpressed face. "I'd kill to be in that river right now."

"Yeah well, maybe you'll find a puddle to trip into." I waggled my brows sarcastically. "But don't hold your breath."

She whipped up her middle finger and waved it in my face. "Screw you, Dixon. If I wasn't so tired, I'd kick your white-trash ass."

I sneered, "Would ya now? Big tough chick, swingin' her big knife and 'er big finger, thinks she's the shit." I waved my finger in her face, mocking her. "Just like a big dyke, ya ask me."

Her eyes narrowed, and her lip stuck out. Hands found her hips_. Ooh, she was angry now._

"Fuck you!" She pulled her fist back to punch my chest, but I snatched it before she could and squeezed.

"That's the spirit, darlin'. But don't go shootin' your mouth off 'fore your brain's loaded, got it? I ain't in the mood for your shit nomore, and daylight's a wastin'. To the South." I jerked my thumb over my shoulder in the direction of that big white house.

Sulking, she jerked her fist out of my hand and stomped ahead, flingin' her dirty hair over her shoulder. I grinned. I didn't mind lettin' her lead for a while. Her butt was far too cute for me to pass up this golden opportunity.

We were almost there and I had been enjoying the view and the blissful silence when she turned 'round and started to walk backwards.

"Call me crazy, but you've been awful cautious lately, Daryl. Ever since the night I found you, in fact. What, exactly, did you do to those guys that they'd bother to follow us this far?"

My lip curled up in frustration before I could stop it, and she saw it. _Damn it. Fuckin' smart-ass woman_.

I looked away, across another field. A walker stumbled through chest-high corn, but from here it was just a black dot. Nothin' to worry 'bout right now.

"I didn't _do _anythin', per se... I just knew too much, is all." I knew that that answer would drive her nuts. I was right.

She threw up her hands in frustration. "What?! What the hell does _that _mean?! "You knew too much"? Were they like, a government-splinter-terrorist group or something? On some sacred mission for _Allah, _maybe?"

I shrugged. "Naw, no terrorists. Just a bunch of _white-trash _rednecks like me." I looked at her significantly, ostensibly stroking my bow's trigger.

She raised a brow as if to say, _After all you've said to me today? __**Really**__?_

I sniffed. Her eyes rolled skyward.

"Fine. I'm sorry I insulted your ethnicity. But you still deserved it!"

"Why?" I demanded.

Beth glared. "You called me a dyke, you asshole!"

_Oh yeah_.

"Alright, so's I did." I sucked in a deep breath. "I apologise."

She pursed her lips, then rubbed her eyes. "Wow, two milestones in one day! Impressive, Dixon! Whoo-hoo. Somebody pinch me."

I narrowed my eyes at her, mock-threatening retribution. "Keep it up, Greene, and I will."

Sticking out her tongue, she let it go, but my fake threat didn't shut her up. _I should be so lucky._

"You still didn't answer my question, babe. What's the big secret?"

We'd reached the laneway. I stopped. She waited. I set the bow on the ground stock-up and leaned on the stirrup, chewin' my lip. Finally, I looked up.

"They were trackin' some guy who'd killed their friend. When they found him, they were gonna murder 'im in cold blood. I wouldn't go along with it, and that's why I was leavin' when ya found me. They'd have gotten rid of me, sooner or later, not just for knowin', but... Because I was lookin' for ya..."

She blinked. "Me? What does this have to do with me?"

My guilt was plain in my voice. "They said they'd help me find ya, but that was 'fore they told me their plan. I couldn't risk men who'd kill in cold blood gettin' anywhere near ya. I _can't _allow that, Beth. Ever."

She swallowed. "Why would they do that?" She whispered. I could tell she didn't want to believe that she was really in that kind of danger.

My sunburnt cheeks stung as I narrowed my eyes again. I didn't want to burden her by telling her what I'd overheard them sayin' about that woman, but I had to. "Because men who murder on principle, for revenge... They ain't known to give rape a second thought. They were just a tad_ too_ eager to help me look for ya, and that tipped me off, I tell ya what. That, and I overheard 'em talkin' 'bout some woman they'd... Used, and, well... Keepin' ya safe is my only priority now."

Hefting up the bow into my elbow, I passed her on my way to check out the farm house. After a moment, she ran to catch up with me, her fingers shyly slippin' into those on my left hand. I looked down at her, and she smiled. Her fingers squeezed mine, and didn't let go til we'd reached the house. She leaned into my side and said, her voice low with emotion, "Thank you, Daryl, really. For everything."

* * *

><p>Boarded windows greeted us as we crept across the front porch, the old wood creaking loudly. I cringed at the racket, and paused frequently to listen for any sounds from inside. I tried the doorknob. Locked. I jiggled it for ten full seconds.<p>

Beth asked, "What are you doing?" Her tone was skeptical.

"Givin' any goons inside a chance to make some noise, whatta ya think?"

She made a moue with her lips, giving her face a bored, annoyed look. I shrugged. "You asked, sweetheart."

She sniffed. "Got me there, cupcake." Her tone oozed sarcasm. I winked.

"Easy, girl. Don't mess with the bull. Might get the horn."

"Don't you mean horn_s_? As in two?"

I chucked her under the chin gently. "Nope. I meant _horn_." I jigged my hips ludely in her direction. She scoffed.

"Pig."

I chuckled. She liked it. _One of these days I'll make her admit just how much._

We finally found a rotten lock on a cellar door and broke into the basement, clearing each floor until it was safe. I was gettin' hungry again, since we'd eaten ever'thin' I had 'fore we were outta the woods, so I told Beth, "Stay here and get cleaned up. I'm goin' huntin'."

She nodded. "Good idea. God, I can't wait to see if the water heater still works."

I rolled my eyes. "Better yet, pray for "tamps"."

She choked, then laughed. "Right. I was lookin' for those, wasn't I?"

"Ugh." I shuddered. She stuck her tongue out at me.

Rolling my eyes again, I left the house behind to explore the other buildings, hopin' to flush out some game. Even a few pigeons would do. To the west, the horizon was lined with black clouds. Every now and then I could see a lightening bolt forkin' down, thunder reaching me several minutes later. The comin' storm was a boon for us; it would wipe away any traces we'd left behind for Joe to follow.

There'd been no signs that we were being followed, and I knew that by now it was doubtful, yet... I still felt uneasy. Just 'cause I hadn't seen 'em, didn't mean they weren't there. We were all experienced outdoorsmen; I couldn't assume Beth and I were safe until I knew for sure, which, unless somethin' happened to prove otherwise, was impossible to know.

It was the not knowin' that was eatin' me alive.

I thought of the constant ups and downs between Beth and I over the last forty-eight hours, and it struck me funny that the two of us, left to our own devices, acted like a damn old married couple, bickerin' and bitchin' at each other, only to swiftly make up again. I smiled. Fightin' with Beth was almost as fun as makin' up with her. _Maybe when I got back I could pick a new fight with 'er, see where it went?_

Kissin' her was nice. Holdin' her close was even better. But until she was over her monthly, I'd not know how good thin's 'tween us could really be. It was frustrating, really. To know you'd both figured out that your feelin's were mutual only to be interrupted in consummatin' them by Mother Nature... _Oh, the irony_.

Ah well, I could wait. In fact, I would be a gentleman and wait til she asked me to make love to her. I snorted to myself, my lip curling in amusement. _That oughta get my little wildcat fired up, to have to earn her way into my bed_. Just the thought of it put a bounce in my tired steps. Beth was prettiest when she was all fired up...

I rounded the barn, high grass brushing my elbows. Chittering was comin' from inside, and I could see barn swallows divin' in and out from the open loft above. The air became gradually electric with the comin' storm; my arm hairs began to stand on end, and the clouds got darker as the minutes passed. I peeked inside through a crack in the faded red boards.

Dust motes floated through shafts of dim light filtering through cracks 'tween the boards on the opposite wall of the barn; it smelled musty; dry, rotten straw and old shit. I doubted any stock animal had occupied this space in over a year, at least. Still, it appeared empty of walkers inside. I kicked the door a few times. More swallows flew out, that was all. Slowly, I unlatched the bolt and pulled the door back.

The screeching of the dry ball bearing in the track was high-pitched enough to hurt my ears. I stopped when the door was open a foot, steppin' sideways into the fecund-smelling darkness inside, crossbow up and ready.

My vision adjusted quickly. Open stalls lined the aisle, empty feed buckets hung on dusty rails. Tack and dry, cracked leather harnesses hung on the walls. Apparently we'd found a horse farm to hang out at for a day or two.

Peeking inside each stall, I checked both rows, latchin' them shut when they were cleared. Some creaked loudly, others swung shut without a sound. It was eerie.

Opening a door in the back, I jumped back in case a dead farmer stumbled out, but only a mouse scurried away into the dusty straw. One dirty window let in enough light for me to see it was an office, with a dust-covered chair, roll-top desk, and an old recliner in the corner. A raccoon glared up at me from the recliner, disturbed from its' rest in the nest of stuffin' it had ripped out of the seat of the old chair. Taking aim, I killed it.

Lookin' 'round, I spotted old faded papers on the desk, mostly invoices and receipts for feed, linseed oil, and some other stuff. Boring shit, really. I pulled open drawers, closed them when nothin' of use could be found. The last drawer had a handgun in it and a box of shells, a .38, according to the box. I stowed them in my jacket pockets.

After the office, the loft was next. The stairs creaked and popped like the joints of an arthiritis patient, and were probably three times older. Rat shit was ever'where. I'd bet this place was overrun with rats at night.

Reaching the landing, all I could see was dry, old hay. No walkers.

Slinging my bow over my shoulder, I took out the gun and inspected it in the fading light comin' in through the open loft. Swallows dived over my head in a flutter, their pounding wings surprisingly loud despite the vast space. Dust, dry birdshit, and bits of hay fluttered down around me like snow. I walked to the edge of the loft and peered toward the house, thinkin' it was a wonder this place hadn't gone up in flames, what with all the bone-dry silage in here.

I looked toward the field across the road, dead wheat waving back and forth in the breeze, but that wasn't what'd caught my eye.

There were five men slowly walkin' 'cross it, single file, weapons up.

My stomach dropped out my ass, or felt like it, and I beat it the hell outta there, stubbing my toe on a ring my foot had caught in the floorboards. Runnin' hell-bent for the house, I kept to the treeline that closely surrounded the big white two-story.

_I hafta hide her before they get here._ Before they found us and did God-knows-what to the woman I'd sworn to protect.

* * *

><p>Poundin' up the stairs to the second floor, I followed the sound of Beth's voice singin' some old Fleetwood Mac song to the bathroom, flung open the door, and yelled, "Get your shit! Get all your shit! We gotta get the fuck outta here! <em>Now<em>! Hurry up!"

Beth jumped up out of the water in the tub, and I regretted that I didn't even have time to appreciate the view she gave me, but we had to leave _right now_.

"What? Why? What happened?" She fired the questions at me, wrapping a towel 'round herself and runnin' across the hall to get dressed. I tried to pick up ever'thin' she'd dropped and put it back where it belonged, in an effort to make it look like we hadn't been here.

"We got company comin' and they ain't friendly. What else did ya move?" The only sign now of occupation in the bathroom was the wet tub and floor. "Throw me your towel!"

She did, after usin' it to quickly wring out her hair. "How much time do we have? I was only in there and in here, why?"

"Put ever'thin' back exactly as ya found it... We gotta make it look like no one was here."

"Okay, gimme a sec." She disappeared back into the bedroom. I wiped down the tub, then the floor all the way to her bedroom door, where there was carpet. She was just pulling on her jeans.

"Was that how ya found the bed?" It was rumpled and messy. I threw the garbage bag on it and stuffed the wet towel 'tween the bedframe and the boxspring.

"Yes. Did you flush the toilet? Don't put that there, bring it with you!"

I stared at her in exasperation, pullin' it back out. "No, why didn't you?!"

She glared back. "The hot water was running!"

I threw the towel down on the bag and made an annoyed sound in my throat. "Just get all your shit in the bag, and leave nothin' behind. I'm gonna see if there's any matches. And flush the fuckin' toilet!" I stomped back downstairs.

Rushing to the kitchen, carefully opening drawers and cupboards, I thought, _Come on_, _farmers gotta have matches... Can't burn down buildings with your enemies inside without matches... _There was a wood stove three fuckin' feet away, they _had _to be here somewhere. I found a flashlight that actually worked, and a big, old knife they probably used to cut watermelons. I shoved the Maglite in my ass pocket and the knife into my belt.

Panic began to rise up my throat like bile. _Where the fuck were the goddamn matches?!_

Finally I heard the toilet flush and Beth's boots stompin' down the stairs. She came into the room panting, "I'm ready, let's go!"

"Not yet, I gotta find some matches."

"What the fuck for? You said to hurry! I hurried, and now you're not ready?! Jesus, Daryl!"

"Shut up!" I snarled, dragging my fingers through my hair, then runnin' to the front room to see how close they were. They'd just reached the road. "_Fuck_! We gotta go!"

We ran to the basement door and went down single file, Beth in the lead. She reached up for somethin' on a shelf just before I pulled the door shut behind us, throwing the room into blackness. "Forget it, just go!"

She'd nabbed whatever it was, and it crackled. She snapped, "Don't fucking push me, Dixon, I'm going!"

I heard her find the outer doors and fling one open. The sky above was almost black, the wind'd picked up, and thunder was gettin' louder and more frequent. Lightening, too.

Beth yelled over the wind, "Think there'll be a tornado?"

I shook my head. "_Not _what matters right now! Get your sweet ass to that barn, _tout-fuckin'-suite_!" I pointed toward the west side of the structure.

She glared at me but did as she was told, and I shut the cellar door, riffling through the grass to find the lock I'd discarded, and, finally finding it, put it back in the hasp, pushin' it shut. It was broken, but there was nothin' I could do 'bout that. Satisfied it looked untouched, I booked my ass to the barn.

I slipped 'round the corner just in time to slide inside the door and lift it shut, raisin' the ball bearing slightly out of the track so it wouldn't make that screechin' noise it had the first time I'd opened it. Beth was peerin' through the cracks. She whispered, "They just reached the house... I don't think they saw you."

I leaned over, bracing my hands on my knees, panting. "Damn right they didn't see me. They ain't gonna see you, neither. But that don't mean they ain't seen _us _since I left 'em. Come on."

Grabbin' her hand, I pulled her to the ring in the floor I'd stubbed my toe on earlier, and, prayin' silently that it led somewhere, pulled up the trapdoor. I shone the Maglite down there, then shoved it into her hand.

"Here."

She took it. "Why are you giving this to me? Aren't you-"

"No." I shoved her down the steps and threw the bag she'd dropped down next to her. "Now you stay down there and don't make any fuckin' noise, ya hear me, Beth? Not one fuckin' peep. Take this knife." I knelt down and handed her the one I'd stuffed in my belt. "Anyone comes down there that ain't me, you don't hesitate, ya got that? _Do not hesitate_. You kill that motherfucker and ya make damn sure he's dead."

She nodded, her eyes squinting up at me. The fear I saw there twisted my gut, but I had to keep her safe. I had to. If I died doin' it, she would get outta here alive. I'd taught her enough that she could squeak by on her own if'n she had to. I hoped it wouldn't come to that, but I had to be prepared for ever' eventuality.

Tears stained her cheeks. I came down three steps, took her face in my hands, and kissed her, hard.

"If'n I don't come back... Get as far away from here as ya can. Keep to the woods, watch your back, and never give up, Beth. Promise me."

She sobbed, "I promise. I love you, Daryl. Kill them. You kill them all and get your ass back here in one piece or I'll... I dunno what I'll do, but you'll fucking regret it!"

I laughed. "I can't wait, honey. Now, take this." I handed her my crossbow.

"Daryl, no, you need it, I can't-"

"Yes ya can." I cupped her jaw with my palm. "You've used it before, and you'll need it out there more'n I will. I can always find a new bow if I hafta."

She began to cry in earnest, but she didn't plead with me not to leave. She knew better.

I backed up, lowering the door. "If I'm not back here 'fore dawn, you get outta here, and ya do it without bein' seen, ya hear? Don't ever let 'em see ya. Ya hafta survive, Beth, ya understand me? Eat that coon in the bag, raw if necessary, but ya _have _to live. For me."

Beth nodded, her hand over her mouth. I nodded back. Then I shut the door, laid the handle flat in its' slot, and covered it with rotten straw.

Thunder boomed overhead, louder out here'n in the house, and rain started to pound the steel shingles. The wind whistlin' through the cracks in the walls was high-pitched. I went to one and watched the house.

The sky darkened quickly as night began to fall, and I saw a light through the kitchen window. Good, they were in there. If things went as I hoped, they wouldn't bother comin' out here in a downpour to check the barn, and I could put my plan in motion.

I waited half an hour for full dark. The rain and thunder were still poundin' down hard when I was finally ready to creep to the snake pit and kill ever' single viper in there. Theirs was a threat that I could _not _overlook.

I prepared myself for a long night.

* * *

><p>Tony went first.<p>

I weaved around the mud puddles to the house, under cover of darkness, and looked into one of the windows where I could detect lantern light; all but two of 'em were asleep, or close to it, on the livingroom floor. Joe and Tony were missin'.

Frowning, I clearly remembered seein' five of them in the field earlier. Guess another of them had bought it somewhere 'tween the night Beth and I fled and now. Oh well, made my job one man easier.

So, the missing two were either upstairs in the bedrooms, which was likely, or just one was up there and another was on watch somewhere else. It seemed a complete circle of the house was in order.

Rain trickled through my hair into my eyes, and the wind and thunder made it impossible to hear any conversation they might be havin', but I'd worry 'bout that when I had to. It was, in fact, a blessin' in disguise. It meant they'd not hear me, either.

After makin' a circuit of the house, I concluded that Tony was on watch; I'd seen him walkin' through the rooms on the lower floor, his AK cradled in his arms, through one of the kitchen windows. Now I knew where almost ever'one was.

_Time to hunt_.

Re-entering the house the same way I'd left it, I climbed in through the cellar doors, gently closin' them behind me. There were a few windows down here, and every time lightening flashed, I scanned the room for any signs of another body down here with me. After three flashes I concluded the coast was clear.

I climbed the cellar stairs during the next round of thunder. Openin' the door a crack, I saw Tony disappear into the kitchen, so I slipped outta there, closed the door silently, and rounded the corner into the dining room. Then, I waited.

A short time came and went, but my patience was rewarded. His shadow preceded him, and, palming my knife, I crouched by the doorframe, ready.

He walked right by me, yawnin'. I watched him like a hawk. There was a small bathroom under the stairs; he set his gun down on the floor and leaned it against the wall outside, then went in to take a piss. I sneaked to the gun, took it, and hid it on the dining room chairs, under the tablecloth where it wouldn't be seen.

Tony emerged from the toilet, pulled up his fly, said, "Hey," when he realised his gun was gone, then choked as I struck from behind, slashing his throat and clampin' my free hand over his mouth in one move. I pinned him to me, his struggles quickly petering off as he died. Layin' him down, I made one decisive stab through his eye, then wiped the blade on his shirt.

Carefully, I carried him to a closet and stuffed his corpse inside.

That was one.

* * *

><p>Len went second.<p>

I crept into the living room, past the three sleeping men who would be my next victims: Harley, Dan, and Len. Billy's crowbar lay near Dan; apparently he'd been the one unlucky enough to bite the dust. _Wonderful_.

Pryin' open a window an inch, I crept back to the dining room and the toilet to wait for nature to do its job.

A while later Len shuffled through, undoin' his pants and stumblin' into the tiny bathroom, the lantern in his hand.

He shut the door, set the lantern on the sink, then looked in the mirror. Our eyes met.

His blood splattered the glass and walls before he ever got a word out.

Adding his cooling corpse to the closet next to Tony's, he too got a quick prick to the eye and a smear of blood on his shirt.

That was two.

* * *

><p>Dan tottered to the toilet much quicker than I anticipated; I barely had time to wipe down the wall and mirror and get my ass back 'hind the door when he hustled in.<p>

Leaning into the tiny room, he whispered, "Len?" The lantern still glowed on the sink.

He pulled the door to look behind it. I was the last thing he saw.

I jammed my bowie knife up into the soft flesh beneath his chin, holdin' it there while he weakly flailed his arms at my head. Gripping his collar, I eased him down to the floor, starin' into his eyes as he gurgled blood from his fat throat.

Deciding not to be caught up short again, I stabbed his eye before he died, then wiped off my blade.

After he'd breathed his last, he too, went into the closet.

Two more to go.

* * *

><p>Harley heard me comin', but he was none the wiser.<p>

I entered the living room with the lantern, set it on the floor where I'd seen it through the window, and laid down next to him in Dan's old spot. It was still warm.

Harley had rolled over when I'd approached. When I had settled in, he rolled back to face me, his eyes still shut.

"You fall in or somethin'? Took ya long enough." He mumbled, restin' his arm over mine. I stared at his lax face in the dim light, my lip curling. _Fuckin' fairy_.

When I didn't answer, he cracked one eye open. If this wasn't such a serious mission the shock on his face would have amused me more.

He jerked, thumpin' the floor dully with his elbow, but I was on him in an instant, my palm coverin' his mouth, rolling us so I straddled him. My knife slid through his stubbly skin like it was hot and his skin was butter. Blood sprayed my face, and I blinked to avoid gettin' it in my eyes. I leaned on him hard as he struggled, wincing as I felt his teeth sink into the side of my palm, but when I stuck his eye, all his muscles went limp, and his head lolled when I pulled my hand away and leaned back.

I heard a soft thump from upstairs.

Freezing, I whipped my eyes up to the landing, but aside from the occasional clap of thunder, less frequent now that the worst part of the storm had passed, no other noise followed. Satisfied that no one was comin' down, I hauled Harley's body over my shoulder and added him to my growin' collection of gruesome closet corpses.

One man left.

* * *

><p>I didn't know how much time had passed; in a way, it'd felt like it'd taken me an instant to kill and stow the four bodies. Conversely, as I slowly climbed the carpeted steps to the second floor, it seemed as if time stood still, and an eternity had gone by between my closin' that trapdoor in Beth's face and this moment.<p>

Reaching the top step, I darted into the first open doorway just as Joe emerged from the bathroom, the sound of water being sucked down the sewer pipe loud in the rain-pattered stillness between thunderclaps. I hadn't even heard him get up.

I peeked out on an empty hallway. A high-pitched squeal of mattress springs sounded as Joe fell back into bed, so I slipped back into the hall and stepped slowly, silently, across the hardwood to his room.

Deep in my gut I knew this would be my most difficult kill; I had formed no attachment to the others and eliminated them with the cold efficiency of an assassin because that was what was necessary: I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that, given the chance, they would have brutally raped and killed my Beth. And more than likely, they would have forced me to watch.

Joe had taken me in; of all of these douchebags, I knew him the best. We had spoken the most, and he had been kind to me. It would be harder to kill him, but I knew I could do it. I recalled the empty look in his eyes as he calmly informed me of his plans for his friends' killer, and my conscience closed off. I knew what had to be done. This kill was personal.

What I didn't count on, was just how hard killin' Joe would turn out to be.

* * *

><p>The hallway was dark enough that when I darted my head forward to quickly scan the room for his location, he missed me when he fired in the dark. The muzzleflash lit up the room, but by then I was long gone, and he was not far behind.<p>

_Fuck! Wasn't expectin' that! _I thought, slidin' around the newel post at the bottom of the stairs just as he reached the top, firin' off another close shot at me. I ducked as I ran, searching in haste for the cellar door.

"Daryl."

I slid around a corner, and stopped to listen. His voice was eerily calm.

"That's you, isn't it, Daryl? I knew you were running when we found ya gone that mornin'. I know I said I was gonna go after that fuckin' shithead what got Lou, but I gotta tell ya, when you ran... It excited me. I'm a hunter, Daryl, and nothin' excites me like a chase. I know you've felt that rush of adrenaline, that anticipation in the pit of your stomach. It only sweetened the deal when we discovered you had your little woman with ya."

He slowly came down the stairs, through the living room, talkin' to the dark. I looked back, and he was heading into the kitchen, his automatic out on front of him, his knife ready in his other hand. I was in the dining room, and he was between me and my escape door. Grippin' my knife, I crept 'round the table, crouchin' 'hind it, sliding Tony's AK out from under the tablecloth.

He kept talking'. "Ya went to an _awful _lot of trouble to cover your tracks after you crossed the river, didn't ya? Those two walkers ya killed, and the spring..." He clicked his tongue like a disappointed father. "Ya shouldn't've jacked the hammer, son. At the very least, ya shoulda buried the evidence!" He laughed.

I frowned. _He knew about that?! _Had they been that close the whole time, and I'd not known it? I was fuckin' slipping, if what he was tellin' me was true, and I hated myself for being so naive as to think I was even _two _miles ahead of them, let alone the ten I'd orginally thought.

Crazily I thought, _Guess I'll be eatin' that hat I don't wear_. _Fuck_.

Joe started down the hall toward me, and I pulled the safety back as quietly as I could, waiting.

"I mean, did you really think we wouldn't be able to follow ya? We lost Billy in the woods after we found your not-too-cleverly mucked-up campsite - he got nabbed by one of three corpses we found sniffin' 'round your girlfriends' discarded blood-rag - _another _mistake on your part -"

I fired.

Joe jumped back as the doorframe exploded, wood slivers and drywall dust blowing out in all directions. He leaned around and returned fire almost immediately, but by then I'd moved to the other side of the door, and as soon as he stuck his gun hand through I whacked it with mine, and he dropped it, yellin'. It bounced under a hutch full of antique-lookin' china plates.

While my gun muzzle was down, he swung back and belted me in the mouth. It stunned me for a second, but that was long enough for him to pull the gun from my grip and point it at my face. I slowly brought my hands up.

"Oh, that wasn't too smart there, was it? Hands up where I can see 'em, smartass. You come into _my _house, kill all _my _friends... You just fucked yourself up the ass, ya know that? Because right now," he shoved me toward the back door, "You're gonna be a good boy and you're gonna show me where you've stashed your little lady friend- Oh! None of that, now."

He'd pressed the gun to my temple to nudge me along, and I'd jerked my head away, glaring. Outside, the world was hoverin' 'tween dark and light as the sun rose behind the clouds. The rain had stopped, for now.

He prodded me out the door, the gun in my back. When I got to the bottom step he shoved me forward so I stumbled, but didn't go down.

Then he shot me.

* * *

><p>"Sonofabitch!"<p>

I clutched my leg, fingers of fire lickin' up toward my knee. That asshole had shot me in the calf. It was a clean shot, in and out, but it bled like crazy and hurt like a motherfucker.

"Get up, you asshole," Joe snarled. "Let's go. I know you've stowed her away here somewhere, and you're gonna take me to 'er, and then... Then we're gonna have some fun."

I glared up at him in the murky morning light, mud caking my left side as I crouched on the ground, compressing my wound with my right hand. It burned somethin' fierce. "Fuck you!"

He leaned over me, a sarcastic smile on his face. "Fuck me? Fuck me?! You're the one who's fucked here, son, if you don't haul your ass up and lead the fuckin' way! _Now_!" His face had turned a puce colour with anger and he was screaming by the end of the sentence. He lashed out with his foot and kicked my throbbing calf.

I gritted my teeth and moaned behind closed lips, the pain shootin' bolts of white-hot lightening down my nerve endings, my eyes squeezed shut. Joe took this opportunity to take my knife from my belt while I compressed my wound with both hands and tears streamed down my cheeks. The last time I'd felt pain this intense, I'd fallen down a ravine and skewered myself in my side with one of my own bolts. I'd lived through that, and I'd live through this, but damn, it was painful. I mentally thanked God that at least I wouldn't have to dig the slug out later, like I'd had to pull the bolt outta my side. I had almost passed out right then from the pain, but my body was no slouch when it came to injuries. I had been dealin' with wounds, accidental or otherwise, all my life. My pain tolerance was usually pretty damn high. Right now, though, I might as well have been a baby for all the tolerance I had. Part of the reason for this was my fear for Beth. I'd lead him to the barn, but I'd take him to the loft - and make my stand. I'd never tell him where she was, and I knew he'd torture me, tryin' to make me talk, but I'd never tell him what he wanted to know.

I sucked in a breath and told myself to tighten it up. I got to my feet, and even though my leg was on fire, blood spurtin' with every step, I walked with barely a limp toward the barn.

Shoving me with the gun muzzle whenever I slowed, Joe asked conversationally, "So how did she find ya? We found her tracks right outside our camp, so she had to have found ya before, or not too damn long after, ya decided to split."

I said nothin'. Every step was moist; my right shoe was fillin' with blood. If I didn't tie off my wound soon I'd bleed to death.

Which, I was sure, didn't trouble Joe in the least.

We rounded the corner of the barn. "Not talkin' eh? That's fine. I'll get it outta ya eventually. Open the door."

I shoved the door open, the track squealing. Joe winced. I tried to go in first, but he shoved me aside, hard. "I'll go first, thank you."

Making a face, I glared.

"Wait out here, and don't even think about runnin'. I know she's around here somewhere, boy. Don't make me torture her, too." He went back in to check the place out.

"Hurry the fuck up then, it's wet out here," I spat. My feet kept sinkin' in the mud, and I had to keep shifting them. I put my hand in my pocket, leaning with the other on the door. And froze.

My hand closed around the .38. In my other pocket, my hand quickly dove inside and closed around space.

_Shit! Where are the shells?! Fuck! The damn gun is useless without shells_!

A tinkling noise made me look up.

"Lookin' for these?"

Joe held up the box of shells. I clenched my jaw. He stepped out and chucked the box of bullets into the field behind us. I heard it land with a splash. Guess they'd fallen out of my pocket when the asshole had kicked me.

"Get your ass in here. We got shit to discuss. And throw that pistol into the field while you're out there. Go on."

Angrily, I chucked the handgun as hard as I could. It bounced off the barn siding, hit a hydro pole, and landed in a mud puddle thirty feet away. Mentally I kicked myself - leave it to me to throw my only remainin' weapon at the broad side of a barn, only for it to end up in a fuckin' puddle. _Perfect_.

Joe smirked. "Good 'nough."

He gestured for me to go in ahead, and I limped past, glaring. So much for my plan to make a stand. I sucked in a breath. I just hoped that she'd stay hidden, no matter how loudly I screamed.

* * *

><p>"Sit your ass down."<p>

I sat. The loft smelled more like rotten hay now that it had rained, than it had earlier in the day, which was a nice way of sayin' that now it smelled like ass. Joe tied my wrists and ankles down to the chair he'd brought up from the office. Then, he tied off my wound. I wasn't all that surprised. Clearly he didn't want me bleedin' to death before he'd worked me over. Guess my dyin' too soon troubled him a tad more than I'd thought. _How con-fuckin'-siderate_.

Not beatin' 'round the bush, I asked, "So, whatta ya gonna do first? Aggravate my wound? Hmm?"

Joe stood up, eyeing me in a slightly exasperated manner.

"Beat me? Burn me? Ya should see my back. You'd be surprised what I can endure, _friend_." I sounded so much more confident than I felt, but I wished I could shut the fuck up. I knew I was only proddin' the bear here, but... _Better me than her_.

He wiped rotten, slippery hay slime off his hands onto his pants, and turned back to the loft steps. "Saw some linseed oil downstairs in the tack room. Thought I might start there." He pulled his lighter out of his pocket and tossed it in the air casually, like we were discussin' the weather. I shrugged.

"Been there, done that. My old man used to put his cigars out on my asscheeks as punishment. And that, just for missin' the toilet seat."

Joe raised his brow. "That so?

I shrugged again. "Yep. Sometimes he'd use his razor strop on me til I bled. Sometimes he starved me. Once, he branded me with an old sadiron." I looked at him, hard. "I ain't tellin' ya shit, no matter what ya do to me, Joe."

His face had taken on a decidedly greenish tint in the grey morning light. Still, he walked away, down to the tack room. I could hear him shufflin' 'round in there and mumbling, but what he was sayin', I had no clue. I sagged against my bonds.

As much as I wished Beth could rescue me this time, since I was pretty sure he was gonna kill me eventually, I prayed to God she'd stay down in that hole. Maybe, if she was smart, she'd already taken off. Regardless, at this point, I was as useless to her as tits on a bull. The thought saddened me.

Tellin' Joe those thin's had opened old wounds. An involuntary flashback of my father beatin' my mother, Merle tryin' his damndest to get in the middle, windin' up beaten himself in her defense... My old man, three sheets to the fuckin' wind, beating the face of the whore he'd brought home because he couldn't get his dick up... My earliest memories were tinged with fear of my father. At family gatherin's (usually funerals), he would set me in his lap and keep me quiet by threatenin' to pinch my balls. Sometimes he did it just because he could. If I yelped, I'd get worse when we got home, like salt rubbed into my cigar-burned little ass.

Silent tears had begun to run down my face, but I was unaware of them_. I may as well die here in this chair._ After such an upbringing, I could never be a good father myself. I knew that the thin's my old man had done to me were wrong, but what was to stop me from flyin' into a rage and doin' the same thin' to my own little ones someday? I didn't think I could trust myself to stop before I hurt 'em. And a woman... I knew, now, after two years with Rick's group, that women functioned best when they were treated as equals, and not like slaves, like my mother was treated. No wonder she used to smoke in bed. If I'd been her I would have just swallowed some pills and been done with it. I knew she didn't want to leave Merle and me alone with him, but I didn't blame her. She put up with more shit from one man than any woman ever ought to, and she did it until she couldn't take it nomore.

Beth would probably be better off without me, anyway. I'd just end up knockin' her up and perpetuating my horrible life cycle all over again. She was better off alone until she found a new group, or our old one. She'd make a valuable addition, now that she had learned what I could teach her. I hadn't had time to teach her ever'thin', but the rest would come to her, in time. Perhaps someday another man could pick up where I'd left off. A better man.

I smiled to myself. Beth would get outta here; she'd go on and make a great wife and mother, and she'd survive, because beneath her catty tongue and baby-blue eyes lay a constitution like that of a bulldog: Beth would never give up, and she sure as hell would never give in. She would live her life to the fullest and laugh at death until she was old and grey, like her Daddy, 'cause people loved her and they would protect her until the bitter end. And she would save them all, just like she'd saved me. Not the physical kind of savin', though I'm sure she would get to do that a few times in the future, but the mental kind; I was really fucked up, for a long time... But after spendin' less'n two weeks with her, I felt more relaxed and at ease with life than I ever had before. It was like she had healed me, and in a way, gotten me to shed my hard skin; that was a greater asset than simply pushin' someone outta danger. To be able to save one from themselves - pull them back from an edge they'd teetered on forever, just waitin' for an excuse to go over - that was the greatest power of all.

Joe came stompin' back up the stairs, his fists wrapped several times in cut up leather harness straps. "Fuck it," he said, and the first blow shattered my thoughts like a sledgehammer on a plate glass window.

* * *

><p>By the time Joe got tired of hitting my face and moved on to my ribs and gut, I was numb. My mouth felt like it was full of cotton and my split lips rained blood into my lap. My tongue had been perforated by my teeth at least once; I'd chipped two and spit out one. My left eye was swollen shut and my right eye wasn't far behind, and the world had taken on a depthless, red haze. Sunbursts danced in the red mist like tiny dust motes.<p>

"You were right... You are one tough sumbitch." Joe panted, down on one knee, massaging his bloody leather-wrapped knuckles. "Didn't think anyone worth his salt could last this long and _not _spill his guts. Then again," he tilted his head thoughtfully to the side, his sweaty hair hangin' in his eyes, "Maybe I just ain't hit the right pressure point, yet."

Slowly gettin' to his feet, his pantlegs stained with hay gunk, he ambled back down the loft steps. When he returned, he had some rope and a bucket. He dropped both on the floor.

My wrists were chafed and bleedin'; my face hugely swollen. I didn't struggle as he untied me and pulled me roughly to my knees, then kicked me forward onto my face. I barely caught myself from face-planting in rotten, slippery hay. My ankles remained tied to the chair.

I wondered with detachment what was in the bucket while I drooled blood on the floor.

Joe bumped the bucket, and somethin' metal clanged against the inside. My head was turned away, and I was too tired to watch what he was goin' to do. Unfortunately, Joe felt it necessary to inform me of his plans.

It had started to rain again outside, softly.

"I'm gonna chip off some of this salt block here, Daryl, with this hoof pick and hammer. Then, I'm gonna collect a little rainwater, and soak this rope in it." He crouched behind me. "Then, I'm gonna cut your trousers off your legs and I'm gonna whip ya with it."

My eye drifted shut. _Hmm_. _Was that all?_

I shrugged slowly as he grabbed up my wrists and re-tied them behind my back.

"Think you'll talk for me this time?" He asked.

"Dunno." I licked my split lips. "Think you'll do me a favour an' go fuck yourshelf up th'ass?" I slurred.

He chuckled. "Keep talkin' boyo, and you'll give me ideas ya won't live to regret."

I felt cool air waft over my backside as he cut my pants open. Then, he began to chip away at the block of salt in the bucket.

He tapped at the block for what felt like forever. I fell asleep several times, but he always woke me with a kick to my gunshot wound.

The third time he kicked me I growled, "Take it up th'ass, moth'fucker!" That earned me _another _kick, this time in the head, for my impertinence. My temple throbbed like someone had drilled a hole in it with a dull bit. I coughed up a ball of bloody phlegm, and it dripped down my cheek to mix with the stinkin' slop I was laying in on the floor. I thanked God for one thin': my nose was so busted I couldn't have smelled shit if I'd wanted to.

After a while he gave up chipping. The sound was replaced by the clangin' inside my head - amplified raindrops hittin' the bucket. Shortly after that, I felt the first lash on the backs of my thighs.

"Errrrrrrrrrrrrr!" My jaw clenched shut, to hold my scream at bay.

He hit me again.

"Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Errr!" This time I sobbed, my sore, tangy-tasting lips clamped shut. I was in agony.

The third time he laid into me I couldn't hold back anymore. I screamed so loud I burst my left eardrum.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!" I wailed like a little girl. The rope struck me in several places at once; Joe, instead of knotting it, had unraveled it. It was literally a brine-soaked cat o'nine tails.

I sobbed aloud, my fresh tears mixin' with the blood that still trickled from my mouth and nose, but I still wouldn't tell him what he wanted to know.

The floor thumped behind me. "Listen, you asshole," he hissed over me, "I ain't gonna wait forever. You tell me where she is now, and I won't whip ya again. If ya don't..." I heard him pull his knife out of its' sheath with my good ear, "I'll cut ya up good, rub salt in all your wounds, then whip ya til you're dead."

Through my coughing fit I spat, "Then y'better get t'over with, 'cause I ain't tellin' ya shit, ya faggotty sonnabitch." I snorted a bloody clot from my nose onto the floor.

I heard him get up and drop the rope in the bucket to soak, pivot to start slicing me up, but then he stopped. He started to laugh.

"Ha! Haha! Hawhawhaw!"

I tried to roll but my busted ribs protested violently. "Wha's so fuckin' funny, asshole?"

"Untie him."

Joe continued to laugh but my skin went dead cold. _Beth! Ugh! Fuck!_

I turned my head and forced my beaten eyes to open. Ever'thin' was shades of bloody red.

Beth held my crossbow up, a bolt loaded in the barrel. It must've taken ever' ounce of strength she had to load it, as skinny as she was now. One hundred and fifty pounds would've been damn hard for her to draw. She clutched it tight to her shoulder, just as I'd taught her, and her finger stroked the trigger. Ready. Her face was expressionless. I'd never seen her look so grim. Her elbow rested on the top loft step, only her upper half visible.

Joe finally stopped laughin' and wiped a tear of mirth from his eye. "Well, well, aren't you a sight for sore eyes, little lady. I been tryin' to get this limp-dick to tell me where he hid ya for the last two hours."

I winced. _Had it only been two hours? _It felt like two years.

Joe dropped his smile. "Gimme the bow, sweetheart, and I won't beat him nomore. You and I can just go find a shady spot and... get to know each other better." He took a step toward her, his hand out.

_Don't do it Beth, please..._

"Stop right there." Beth climbed to the top of the steps and faced Joe head-on. If she was afraid, she did a damn fine job of hidin' it. "You didn't let me finish. I said, untie him, and I won't blow your eye out with this bolt, motherfucker."

I saw Joe clench his fist around the knife in his hand. It was behind his thigh; I didn't know if Beth had seen it yet. I opened my mouth to warn her, but all that came out was a croak as I choked on another clot of bloody phlegm in my throat. I began to cough hard, clutching my chest painfully, my broken ribs screamin' as my lungs convulsed for air. _Fuckin' body, chokin' at the worst possible moment!_

Her eyes had strayed to me when I started flopping around like a dyin' fish, and I tried to hold on to consciousness, stretching my hand out to warn her because Joe had seen her eyes stray, too, and in that second of distraction he lunged at her-

Beth whipped her eyes back, the fear and panic she'd been hiding springin' out as they widened, and she squeezed the trigger, firing the bolt at his head. She'd fired slightly wide, missing his cheek by a hair, but he brought the knife up and slammed into her with his shoulder, tippin' her backward off the edge of the step, his momentum pushing them both over.

My sight started to blur and fade, panic rising like bile to join the gooey blockage in my throat, but before it all went black, I saw her twist at the last second and avoid most of his driving momentum, but her eyes locked with mine as he went down behind her, his hand flailin' out and catching her hair at the last second, jerkin' her off balance and causing her to drop the crossbow in surprise. Her eyes widened and her mouth opened, screaming my name, but as darkness closed in and her body disappeared over the lip of the step, her voice echoed to me as if from far away, down a long tunnel. I reached for her again, then lost consciousness completely.

* * *

><p>The sensation of someone slapping my face pulled me to the surface, but I couldn't quite get there... A muffled voice called me desperately, as if from underwater, but I didn't surface fully until a sharp jab to my chest made me cough up a horrendous wad of blood, clots, and phlegm. I coughed caustically several times before fallin' back, exhausted and sorer than hell. I began to fade away again.<p>

"Daryl... Daryl... Daryl! Wake up, goddamn you! You sonofabitch! Don't you leave me, you sorry sack of shit! Daryl!"

I was already gone.

* * *

><p>"Daryl."<p>

I woke with a snort. Somethin' warm and slippery trickled past my lip onto my scruffy chin.

"Shh, don't move." Beth's voice said. I couldn't see her.

"Beth?" My voice sounded like someone had dumped a load of gravel down my throat. A dry cloth wiped away the goo that had run from my nose. "That you, darlin'?"

She sniffed, and took just a few seconds too long to answer. I frowned. Then tried to open my eyes.

"It's me, Daryl. How do you feel?"

My eyes wouldn't open, so I gave up tryin' to see her. Considering the soft, dry surface I was occupying, I assumed I was back in the house again, but it still smelled like the barn. From what little air I could draw through my nose, that is. Which was almost none.

"I feel like a sack of pounded assholes, if you'd really wanna know," I replied slowly, working my sore jaws around the words. My mouth tasted like I'd been suckin' on a big copper blank.

She snorted a bit, then brushed my hair off my forehead, her fingers gently brushing my temple. "You look like a sack of pounded assholes."

I coughed, painfully. "Why, thank you." I tried to find her in the dark. "Am I blind or's it just dark in here?"

Beth inhaled slowly, then I heard her get up. I waited.

"You're not blind... I think."

I frowned. "Ya think?"

"What was the last thing you remember seeing?" She asked, sitting down next to me again.

I shrugged, but stopped mid-motion - it was too painful. Mentally I reminded myself not to do that again. "Last thin' I remember is seein' Joe go down the steps, and ya fallin' with 'im." I took a breath. "Is he dead, Beth?"

She paused. "More or less."

I raised a brow. That sounded... evasive. I was so confused.

"Are ya alright?" I reached out and brushed what I thought was her shoulder, but turned out to be her breast. She grabbed my hand and brought it up to her face.

"I'm just fine. Joe broke my fall."

"Oh. Good. 'Bout time that asshole did somethin' useful." I cleared my throat. It didn't make any difference, it still felt phlegmy. But I really didn't want to start coughin' again.

"Where are we?"

Beth leaned over me and pressed her lips to my brow. "We're under the barn, in the crawlspace." She rested her cheek gently against my forehead. "I think the previous owners used to have a son who used this place for a secret hideout. There's a cot, blankets, BB guns and BB's all over the floor... And hunting magazines. A lantern. It's handy."

I frowned. "There's a lantern? Where?"

"Right next to your head."

I started to panic inside. _Was I really blind? _If so, she may as well kill me now, 'cause I was no use to her blind. I'd only get us killed if'n we had to leave.

"Why can't I see it?"

I felt her shrug. "I don't know, Daryl. Maybe shock?" I felt her fingertips brush my lashes, and was surprised to find that my eyes were wide-fuckin'-open, but all I could see was black. _Fuckin' hell_.

I started to hyperventilate. Beth leaned on my chest to hold me down, to calm me, but my broken ribs protested and I cried out, pitifully, the pain blotting out any embarrassment I might have had over being so weak in front of her.

She immediately removed her weight, but the damage was done; I wheezed, pertrified that I was blinded for life and fighting with ever'thin' I had left not to succumb to the pain of my broken bones. Finally, my breathing slowed and I relaxed, exhausted. Tear trails dribbled down my face. Beth dabbed them dry.

"Are we safe?" I asked in a whisper.

She replied, "Yes. I've tied down the trapdoor... even if he did end up finding the ring, he'd not get in without me hearing it."

I heard a shuffling above us, and growls. Guess Beth was right. Joe'd bit the bullet alright - more or less. Even though he was less dangerous now, it didn't lessen the threat he posed. Until we eliminated him, we were stuck down here with almost nothin' because I'd never meant for Beth to stay any longer than six hours, so I'd not left her any water to drink, and all we had to sustain the both of us was one day-old raccoon. Which we'd hafta cook, now, because it was old enough to start rottin'. The way I felt, though, food didn't appeal to me at all, less-than-fresh or otherwise.

"Oh, Daryl." I felt Beth heave a quiet sob next to me.

I squeezed her fingers. "What is it?" Concern knotted my pounding brow. _I'd kill for some drugs right about now_, I thought longingly.

Her voice quivered as Joe lumbered and gurgled above us. "Your face is so swollen I don't even recognise you anymore. I can't tell how many of your ribs are broken, and you're chafed or bleeding in several places... And your legs-" she sobbed.

I shook our fists. "I'll be alright." I was less than sure of that statement, because we still had to wrap my ribs and care for my wounds, not to mention the bullet wound... _Ugh. Life's gonna suck for a while._

"I got you down here just before he turned," she told me, strokin' my furry knuckles. "When I landed on him, I thought he was going to get up and drag me off, or at least try to hold me down. He was already dead, though. I think he must have broken his neck or spine... He walks funny."

"Spine," I said.

"Yeah. Anyway, I haven't gone up again to search the house for supplies, I-"

"Ya don't have to go to the house," I wheezed. "There's a tack room... Should have all sorts of shit for carin' for horses." I reached for her face again, wishing I could see. "But ya still gotta kill him. I'd do it for ya, but, ya know." I waggled my brows pathetically.

She smiled, I could hear it in her voice. "I will." She shifted. "Have you seen my knife?"

I smiled. "I _have _seen it... but I couldn't tell ya where my ass is right now, let alone your knife."

Beth _tsk_ed. "I'm sorry, Daryl. It'll come back. I know it will. You're the luckiest bastard I know."

I hoped she was right.

She shuffled 'round for a few minutes, found her knife, and shoved it in its' sheath. I heard the button snap as she strapped it in. The I heard her pull a bolt from the crossbow quiver, pull the cable back to the spring, load the bolt on the barrel. She grunted several times before I heard the cable finally catch. She panted from the effort.

"Wish me luck."

I snorted, accidentally snottin' a wad of gunk onto my lip, again. "Ugh. Good luck."

She wiped my face again, gently, and handed me the rag in case I needed it. I wondered where she'd gotten a rag from.

Beth asked, "Make some noise, Daryl, so he's distracted when I open the door."

"Yes ma'am," I replied, then started to moan. Loudly. Because it wasn't difficult and I rather felt like doin' it. I wished I could pass out again.

Soon there were mushy sounds over me, and I felt dust hit my battered face from the floorboards over my head. He was there, all right. To Beth I whispered, "Go!"

I heard the door fly open and bounce back as hinges met lumber, and her hurried bootheels pound the wood, her breaths comin' fast and shallow. I knew she'd be fine; if she missed with the bow she had her knife, but I had a terrible urge to drag myself up those steps and defend her, blinded and beaten or no. It was _my _job to protect her, goddammit, not the other way around.

I was useless and it was all my fault. Now Beth would have to expend all her energy patchin' me up, feedin' us, _and _keepin' an eye out for visitors - which was a lot of responsibility for someone her age. I could handle all that, and had, in the not so distant past, but I was older and used to lookin' over my shoulder. If I hadn't failed to kill Joe when I'd had the chance... I could have avoided all this. I felt yet another tear track its way down my swollen face. I closed my eyes and tried not to think 'bout what I'd do if'n she didn't come back.

* * *

><p>"Daryl, wake up. Daryl."<p>

My shoulder shook lightly. I came to awareness still in a dark pit of nothin'. I gasped a little, remembering my blindness.

"Beth... Ya alright?" My voice was a bit stronger this time.

"Yeah. I found lots of good shit up there." She rustled. "I should move you to the house. I don't like it down here... And there was food over there."

I coughed a little. "There was?"

"Yeah, I saw some preserves in the basement, so maybe there's more."

I tried to roll over toward her voice, but her hand reachin' out to touch my chest stopped me. "Don't. Not yet, I've got work to do before you go anywhere."

I flopped back, huffing as a sharp jolt skittered up my side. _Fucking ribs._

"Fuck! I wanna fuckin' _see _ya!" I flung my arm over my face. The impotence of being able to do nothin' but lay here ate at me like a canker sore. "I wanna get up and take a piss, and I wanna see what I'm fuckin' aimin' at! _Fuck_!"

I felt Beth jump as I lashed out with my fists, beating the cot at my sides, whimperin' when the sudden movement jarred my whole body. I started to cry in earnest this time.

Beth sat on the floor beside me, cooing at me in a soothin' voice to be quiet, that I'd be okay, we'd get through this... Perversely, I kinda wanted to smack her for being so goddamn optimistic when I was so beyond fucked-up it wasn't funny. How many people went blind and then miraculously got their sight back? No one I knew. But as much as I wanted to tell her to shut up and be realistic, I kept my mouth closed and let her comfort me. I'd do myself no good if I antagonised her just 'cause I was feelin' sorry for m'self.

After I'd calmed down, she whispered, "Why didn't you tell me you had to go to the bathroom?"

I closed my eyes and let my head sag toward her. "I'm used to doin' for myself, Beth. Always have, and I 'spect I always will. I'm sorry I'm bein' such an asshole."

She chuckled softly, strokin' my sore cheeks. "You're not an asshole, Daryl. You're hurt. You're hurt because of me, and I hate seeing you like this. I hate it!" She buried her face in my neck and her hot tears trickled onto my own fevered skin. I found her back and rubbed circles on it with my palms.

"It ain't you're fault, Beth, ya hear? What happened is on me, ya got that? I had a chance to kill that motherfucker and I fucked it up. I'm to blame... It was me who failed, goddammit! It was _me_! I just couldn't bear the thought of 'im touchin' ya... Hurtin' ya. I let him get the drop on me and I'll carry that burden the rest of my life. And," I stopped rubbin' her back to poke it, "What the hell were _you _doin' comin' outta here like that?! Huh? I thought I told ya to stay hidden, no matter what. Ya disobeyed me, Beth." I cleared my phlegmy throat. "Remind me to punish ya when I'm better."

She started to laugh, knowin' I was full of shit. She rested her elbow on my bladder and I winced.

"What is it?"

I felt my cheeks flush. "Ya got a bottle down here? I gotta-"

"Oh! Yes! I'm sorry. Here." She handed me what felt like an old beer bottle. She got up and moved away as I unbuckled my ruined pants and found the bottle's opening. I almost sighed out loud in relief.

She took it from me when I was finished; I don't know whether or not she saw my cock before I put it away, but I woulda killed to see if her face was as pink as I thought it'd be. She didn't comment one way or the other.

"Time to get to work."

I frowned. "On?"

"You." It sounded like she'd said it around her shirttail. I sagged. _Oh, goody._

Beth made several ripping sounds near me. I heard the clink of glass and then she was tippin' somethin' into my mouth.

"What was that?" I asked after I swallowed. It tasted like ass.

"Laudanum."

I made a face. "Laudanum? Where the hell ya get laudanum?" My brain started to feel fuzzy.

"It was in the tack room. I don't know if it was for horses or people, but it was there, anyway. I found some ointment for your sores and cuts, some linen to bind your ribs and bullet-wound, and some iodine, too."

Her voice started to sound like I was sinkin' into a deep well of claustrophobic water, and 'fore I could have another thought, I was gone.

* * *

><p>When I broke the surface of consciousness again, I was on my stomach, my face pointed to my left, and the draft on my backside was considerable. I shivered.<p>

"You waking up?"

I tried to say _Yeah_, but what came out was, "Merrrghh."

"Come on, drink up." The ass-tastin' liquid trickled down my throat again. I tried to spit it out but her hand covered my lips and nose, the other rubbin' my Adam's apple briskly, makin' my throat itchy enough that in order to cough and expel the tickle, I first had to swallow. So I did.

I coughed twice and the blackness I'd been inhabiting lately swam back up to claim me once more.

* * *

><p>Warmth.<p>

The heat was what brought me back. My arms, chest, and stomach were so warm, it was nice. Sensation began to come through: hands. She was massagin' me.

Well, my blood decided it'd better haul ass to where it _might _potentially be most useful, and my cock hardened fiercely. I groaned.

Beth's ministrations didn't stop. She moved on to my neck and jaws, rubbin' 'em gently, thoroughly. If I could've purred, I think I would've.

"Hmm," I rumbled. "Feels good."

I heard her smile in her voice. "I bet it does. Feel warm?"

I nodded. "Yep. I'm _real _warm, darlin'." My voice was husky, low; aroused.

She laughed a little. "That's the KY jelly working. Apparently our farmer friends were adventurous."

My skin felt tingly wherever she touched it. I was startin' to feel adventurous, too.

"Thought I'd wake you up in a more pleasant fashion this time, now that I don't have to keep a constant watch on the door."

As great as her hands felt, her words were still penetrating through the fog of sexual desire buildin' below my belt. Perhaps the faster I got her to shut up, the faster I could work off this awful itch in my pants.

"Why's that?" I asked, pretty sure I didn't give a flyin' fuck. My hands reached up to cradle the back of my head as I mentally sent vibes to her hands to move lower, _much _lower.

"I moved you to the house. You're in the master bedroom, now. I must say, it's a lot nicer in here. And your ass weighs a goddamn ton, you know that? Good fucking thing you're worth it."

_Hmm_, _fuckin'_. _Yes, ma'am_. _Don't mind if'n I do. Heh._

Without realisin' it, I began to slowly rotate my hips. Beth noticed. She stopped massaging me.

I frowned, reachin' out with one hand to find her. I bumped her shoulder, then ran my hand down to her arm to her hand and put it back on my gut. "I didn't say stop."

She didn't reply. I nudged my belt with her hand a few times, hopin' she'd get the hint. She didn't seem to, and started to work her way back up to my pecs.

Guess I was gonna have to be blunt.

"Beth, darlin'...?"

"Yeah?" Hesitant.

I guided her hand back to my belt. "If ya don't finish what you've started, I'll go fuckin' crazy."

"You mean, you want me to...?" Her question hung in the air, her shyness surprising me. Was this the same girl who'd tried to climb me like a tree not that long ago, never mind when, exactly?

I nodded. "Mmhmm. If'n ya don't mind?" I hoped makin' it seem like I was givin' her a choice would bring her around to my way of thinkin'.

She started to unzip me, all reticence gone from her touch. "I _suppose _I can do you this one small favour. Any man who tries to sacrifice himself to save my skin is certainly entitled to a little compensation." Her voice had a saucy lilt to it.

_There was the vixen I knew was in there, heh._

"Appreciate it, darlin'."

She reached into my pants and palmed my cock, squeezin' it gently with her oily fingers. I began to tingle, and the sensation was enough to make me want to squirm, though I figured with my injuries that was probably a bad idea, but I felt pretty fuckin' good right now, surprisingly. Maybe she'd whacked me up with some kick-ass drugs, or maybe it was the endorphins, but _fuck_, I felt good.

Beth shimmied my pants down far enough that they stayed out of the way. Using both hands, she began to massage my cock, alternately strokin' fast and then slow. Occasionally she'd reach underneath and give my balls some attention, too. It felt fan-fuckin'-tastic, and my hips were thrusting right along with her strokes. I began to whimper deep in my throat; as I got closer to the end they turned into moans. I started to lean up on my elbows, head thrown back, thrustin' into her hands as hard as I dared, grunting in total ecstasy.

She began to work me harder; if I told her to, or she just knew, I don't recall, but the harder she pulled my shaft, the harder I became, and the closer to satisfaction I got. When I finally came, I threw my head back and groaned out loud, the orgasm shootin' through all my nerve endings, my hips thrusting desperately. Just before I could make a mess, I felt her warm mouth close around me, and her tongue, combined with the tingly oil, brought me immediately to the second most powerful orgasm of my life.

This time I clutched her hair in one hand convulsively as I drove my cock into her mouth, my balls tightening up as they gave up their payload a second time. As I came back down from the high, I fell back, exhausted, my pain beginning to make itself known even through whatever painkillers she'd given me. I panted for breath, and wished like hell I could see Beth's face so when I thanked her, I could kiss the pretty pink flush of her cheeks.

Beth gave me one last, hard pull with her lips, and let me go, gently tucking my cock back into my pants and doing up my zipper, but leavin' my belt undone. I suddenly felt stupidly tired, so tired, in fact, that I fell asleep before I could say anythin' at all.

* * *

><p>The next time I woke up, I rolled my eyes around the room. Or what I thought was the room. Ever'thin' was still black, but not as black as before. This time it was... different.<p>

A warm breeze wafted in through an open window, bringin' with it the sweet smell of fall in Georgia. A wind chime tinkled somewhere in the distance.

Movement alerted me to someone lyin' beside me in bed, and I turned my head that way. The darkness brightened a bit more.

"Beth?"

Beth blew her breath out her nose and stretched next to me like a big cat. I felt her hair touch my face. "Morning, stranger."

My lip curled up in a one-corner smile. I reached out to touch her and felt warm, bare skin. I reached a little further, and remarked, "Hmm, bare. Reminds me of this spectacular dream I had not too long ago."

She rolled her spine, sat up, and leaned over me. Her hair was in my mouth now, and I spit it out while she giggled.

"That was no dream, Dixon. I've been waiting quite a while for you to wake up long enough to return my favour."

I grinned. "Not a dream, eh? Huh. Well," I stretched myself, feeling my body tinge in protest, but on the whole, I felt better than I had in ages, it seemed. "I'm a bit stiff, but I'll do my best, darlin', to please ya."

The back of my mind tickled with the thought that not so long ago I was reluctant to give in to Beth's - and my own - growing desire, for several reasons. The top one: turnin' out to be a terrible father. But after what she'd done to me the last time I was awake, I was fuckin' ruined. I _had _to make love to her now - I'd tasted the forbidden fruit and it was juicy, soft, and very willin'. _Had any other red-blooded man ever required more?_

She swung her leg over my waist and settled her hips against mine. Pleasantly I realised that I was naked beneath the sheet, too. She leaned her arms on my shoulders; I reached up to touch her as she slowly rubbed her crotch against mine, only the sheet separating our bodies. My vision lightened further til all I could see were colourful blurs in front of me, but soon they coalesced in one pale, blond blur. For the first time in I didn't know how long, I reached out for somethin' and didn't miss.

I watched Beth throw her hair back over her shoulder as I massaged her breasts in my calloused palms, a perfect handful of smooth, pale flesh in each. Her eyes slid closed and she stopped moving for a moment, bringing her hands up to cover mine as I explored her chest.

Within minutes my sight had returned completely, and I batted around the idea of pretendin' blindness for a while longer, but then she leaned down to kiss my mouth and all thoughts outside of sex fled after that. Hell, I was so absorbed, I forgot that she had her period.

Beth stretched her body out on top of mine, our mouths locked, our flesh pressed tightly together. My hands gripped her neck and jaws while hers feathered over my shoulders and arms, makin' pit stops at my neck on the way back up. She moved her face so I kissed her jawline, following her pulse while she bit my ear between her teeth, soothin' the bites with strokes of her hot little tongue.

Bracing herself against the mattress beneath me, she lifted her chest, and I eagerly followed her neck to her nipples, sucking and nippin' at 'em, my hands reaching up to angle them just right. She mewled quietly as I had my way, payin' homage to one of the most sought after spots on the female form, and my personal favourite.

When she'd had enough, she slid down my body until she'd exposed my cock and I sank back into the mattress in ecstasy as she sucked my cock for a few moments. I had a favour to repay though, so I pulled her back up quickly. (I'd never tell her that a man only really needed a few minutes of attention down there, if that, to be more'n ready - who benefitted from tellin' that truth? Right, _no one_. Hehe.) Rollin' us - I didn't even think about how much that _should _have hurt me - , I let her bear my full weight as I kissed my way down her torso, swirling my tongue inside her belly button before movin' lower. Pullin' her ass closer with both hands, I rooted around in her curls until I found what I was lookin' for, swathed the little nub with my tongue, then grazed it with my teeth. She jumped, makin' a little peep.

I smiled into her. "Hold still now, darlin'."

Beth's finger's found my scalp and her nails scored it lightly as I began to suckle her clit, makin' it swell and throb beneath my tongue. I sucked it, nipped it, and soothed it alternately, until she was squirmin' so hard beneath me that if I didn't slow down, she'd come without me. Unfortunately I wasn't as selfless as she was, and I climbed over her, holdin' my cock just right, and slid inside her.

She was tight; god_damn_. And hot. I pushed until I came up against somethin' stretchy, but before I could even recognise it for what it was, in her eagerness, Beth had wrapped her legs around my ass and she used them to push me sharply into her as far as I could go. The stretchy thin' tore, and a wave of heat cased my cock, but she felt so good I had to move, so I back out a bit, then drove forward again - slowly.

Her nails raked my chest hard, but I felt no pain, just heat. I thrust again and again until we had a good rythym goin'. I leaned over her on my elbows, grippin' her shoulders from underneath her back to keep her in place as my pace became more and more frantic. She came 'round me, cryin' out and squeezin' my cock tightly in spasms, but I wasn't done. I felt like a fucking asshole but I had to keep goin', I _had _to. Instinct drove me into her harder, my lips findin' her neck and fastening on it, suckin' her white skin desperately as I reamed her, her cries tellin' me that she was comin' again, and I felt my own pressure finally build to a peak, and a few more hard, punishing strokes later I groaned, comin' hard inside her.

Her legs grippin' my ass tight, I gripped her body back as I pumped my seed into her, rammin' her again and again until I had nothin' left to give. Her cries of pleasure drowned out mine before I collapsed on her, my tender ribs screamin' for relief, both of us panting and exhausted.

Eventually I rolled off of her, that thought ticklin' my mind again, that thought that I was 'sposed to remember... I frowned.

"I thought ya had your monthly, uh, gift." I looked at her face.

Beth raised her brow. "I thought you were blind." She smiled lazily, her arms cradling her head, her skin glowin' in the sunlight that filtered in through the partially boarded window.

I grinned. "Surprise."

She reached over with her hand to stroke my stubbly cheek. "When did it come back?"

I shrugged. "It started to brighten up when I woke up, but it didn't get back to normal til ya crawled on top of me." I waggled my brows at her and leaned over to lick her pink, puckered nipple.

She snorted in mirth. "I'm glad, Daryl." Her smile was beautiful. Her skin shone with a sheen of sweat.

I toyed with said nipple distractedly. "You were a virgin."

She just stared back at me, her eyes unreadable. Finally, she replied. "So?"

I shrugged again. "Never been with a virgin 'fore." I kissed her nipple, avoiding her eyes. "Did I hurt ya?"

She laughed. "No."

"I felt somethin' rip in there."

"You were supposed to. I barely felt it. That's why I pushed you." Her fingers toyed with my bangs. "I wanted to get to the good part. I _may _have been a tiny bit impatient."

It was my turn to laugh. "Really? I thought _I _was the impatient one." I blew a breath across her wet skin. I chuckled, "Hell, I was gonna make ya _earn _your way into my bed. So much for that bullshit, eh?"

Beth shivered and made a face at me, gooseflesh breakin' out over her chest, but she couldn't stop the smile that crept across her lips. I smiled back at her from under my brow. Another random thought hit me, and I changed the subject.

"How long've I been in bed, Beth? I feel... better. A lot better."

She sighed. "You should. I've been tending to you up here for three weeks."

_Three weeks?! Fuck, had it been that long? Jesus._

She kept talking. "I used up the laudanum to keep you asleep. You kept thrashing and having nightmares, and I was afraid you'd puncture your lungs if I didn't do something. You didn't seem to dream when I gave you laudanum. But I've been easing you off of it, and you were sleeping better, so I stopped giving it to you three days ago. Today is the first day you've woken up on your own."

I scratched my armpit absently. It illicited a nasty smell that was embarrassin', and I made a face. She saw it.

Beth got out of bed and walked around to my side, pulling the sheet off of me. "Come on, big guy, let's go."

I was grateful for her help as she slipped herself under my smelly pit, bearin' some of my weight as we shuffled out of the room. "Where we goin'?"

"_We _are going to have a shower."

I ginned. "Are we? Well, hell, I'll go along with that."

She laughed. "I doubted you'd have any objections!" She manouevered me into the bathroom, easin' me down to sit on the toilet lid while she pulled the curtain and turned on the water. She left the room to get some towels while we waited for the water to warm up.

While she was gone, I hauled myself up to look in the mirror, thinkin' I'd see some nasty shit, considering the beatin' I'd taken, and prepared myself for damage. What I saw blew me away.

My face was various shades of post-bruise yellow-brown, and there were several red scabs healing here and there. My lips, which I remembered bein' chapped and sore, were still red, but they were dry and healed. What appalled me most about my reflection was my total lack of hair.

I rubbed my slightly-shadowed chin in shock. I hadn't been completely clean-shaven since, well... Ever. I'd _always _had a goatee. When my facial hair'd started to grow in as a teenager, I'd settled on the goatee and never varied; I experimented with my trimmer, but I'd never shaved it _all _off. I gaped. I looked twelve fuckin' years old. It'd started to grow in again, but it didn't have near the density it had before.

She'd cut my hair, too, down to a close crop. I liked that. Ran my fingers through it, played with it. It was nice not to have to push it out of my eyes. On one side it was a lot shorter than the other. I frowned. _What the... ?_

"Do you like it?"

I'd been so absorbed in my reflection I hadn't heard Beth return, her arms full of towels.

"Well, I like my hair, but did ya have to shave my face?"

Beth set the towels down on the toilet and stood next to me. I watched in the mirror.

"You had a lot of cuts on your face, so, yes, I did. It'll grow back." She hugged my arm, and I raised the other to rub my face, 'cause I just couldn't believe my eyes. "I had to shave your temple, here." She brushed my ear with her fingers, which explained why my hair was so damn short on that side.

"Hm." Now that I was really lookin', a pinkish scar interrupted my hairline there, where I'd needed stitches. I sighed. For as badly as I'd been hurt, Beth had done an amazing job patchin' me up. My ribs weren't taped up right now, but I knew I would need them to be before the day was out... _Holy shit_.

I looked down. My chest was shaved, too. Jesus_. I'm practically a naked mole-rat!_

I rubbed my pecs, and she laughed. "At least there's an upside."

I turned to look at her skeptically. "Which is? I look like a competitive swimmer, for Christ's sakes."

"That may be so, but you don't look like a damn hobo anymore, either." She left me to check the temperature of the water, which was rapidly steamin' up the room. "Come on, Daryl Dixon. Get your cute white butt in here."

I turned around. She was already under the spray. I pulled back the curtain some more and joined her. It felt great to be under hot water, and I ran my hands through my hair.

"Alright, that's enough, you sorry invalid," She smiled up at me, pokin' my chest with her chin. "I'll take it from here."

Bar of soap in hand, Beth scrubbed me down. I slightly resented bein' called an invalid, because I wasn't a baby and I was feelin' good enough that I could've done all this without her help, but her hands on me felt so good, and she was so _thorough_, that I shut my hole and let her do her thin'.

She started with my ears and neck, diggin' her fingernails gently into the shell of my ears and washing industriously behind them and under my chin, workin' her way down to my shoulders, chest and back. She turned me when she was done lathering my smooth chest to tackle my backside, using her fingers to easily manipulate the sore, abused muscles as she cleaned my skin. It felt so good I leaned against the wall, restin' my forehead against it and closin' my eyes, just savouring her hands all over me.

Beth paid particular attention to my "cute white butt", kneading each cheek briskly and gettin' deep in between. I twitched at this at first, but she didn't seem to notice, so I didn't say anythin'. I certainly noticed when she spread my legs and latched onto my balls, I'll tell ya that much. She soaped them in her fist, and I shuddered with pleasure.

"Want me to turn around?" I asked, praying she'd say yes.

"When I want you to turn, I'll turn you, Dixon. You just concentrate on that wall."

_Ohh, fine, be that way_, I thought, frustrated. My cock was hard enough to hurt. I debated grabbing it myself and easin' its' pain, but decided waiting would not only test my endurance, it would heighten the pleasure I'd feel when she finally got 'round to it. There was somethin' to be said for anticipation, after all.

Besides, I'd never jacked myself off in front of anyone before - not that I'd been aware of, if what Joe had told me was true, at any rate. I 'sposed I should save that little show for now, though I was sorely tempted, Beth's presence be damned. Perhaps that was somethin' I could treat her to, later. Maybe.

Beth worked her way down my thighs, knees, and calves, being extra gentle around my bullet-wound, which was pink and still sported three stitches in both the entry and exit. I noted with displeasure that she'd shaved that, too. Damn it, all I needed now was a fuckin' Speedo and a noseclip.

Liftin' my foot, she washed between each of my toes, and up to this point in my life, it was the most erotic thin' I'd ever experienced, don't ask me why. I loved it, though, and when she grabbed up my other foot, I almost bit my tongue in arousal.

Finally, she turned me. On her knees at this point, she was in a prime position to admire my proud erection, up-close-and-fuckin'-personal. She paid no attention to it at first. I frowned, but shrugged. She'd get there.

My shins and kneecaps had never been so clean before Beth had gotten to 'em. I think any hair I had left on my legs, she scoured off, she was so focused on her task. Not that I was complainin', of course. I'd decided that if she ever wanted to do this again, I'd give my full co-operation, no questions asked, hehe.

I watched her hands move up my thighs, headin' for the home stretch, and she frequently had to move my cock aside to get in the crevices where my thighs met, and then finally, sweet Jesus, she got to my sweet spot. _Thank you, God._

Rubbing soap onto her palms, Beth lathered me up, strokin' my shaft and tip with a firm grip, surely obliterating any and all dirt or grime that had ever hidden there. I fell back against the wall, hot water splashin' down my chest, rinsing away her soap before she was ready, but by this point, I was so ready for Round Two I reached out, cupped her jaws, and gently pulled her up, then, kissin' her mouth, I wrapped her arms around my neck and hoped my ribs were healed enough, because I slipped my hands beneath her ass and lifted her onto my waist. Her legs immediately tightened around me to support her own weight, and my ribs only screamed a little. The pain was tolerable.

It lessened as I pushed her up against the wall, and lowered her fractionally onto my throbbing cock. Fuck, I was so swollen and she felt so slick and tight, I could have died from pure bliss just slidin' into her.

I pushed in all the way, spreadin' her, and she shuddered in my arms, her mouth opening slightly and her eyes rollin' back in her head, and a tiny, gutteral grunt slipped out from between her lips. It sent a bolt of sexual energy straight through me, that little sound, and I started to fuck her hard, my fingers diggin' into her ass to hold her steady as I did all the work. Beth, she held on, desperately, her cries gettin' louder and longer the harder I reamed her.

It quickly got to the point where we were both ready to come, and I picked up my pace, pantin' into her ear as I worked. Her nails dug into my shoulderblades, right under the bone, and she pulled up on them hard as she came, her body milkin' mine for all it was worth. I followed almost right after, grunting so loudly I winced, my body doin' its damndest to get as deep inside of hers as it possibly could, releasing its sticky offering within.

After a moment, our breathing slowed down and she sagged against me, her tired legs danglin' toward the tub floor, my cock inside her and my hips the only thin' holdin' her up. Her arms around my neck were barely hanging on, and my own had dropped to her sides, sore from exertion. I leaned my upper body against hers, pinioning her there to the wall. Finally, her lips found mine.

We stood there for quite some time, still joined, just enjoying bein' together, the afterglow of phenomenal sex leaving us both limber and tired.

"Hmm, that was awesome," she murmured. I nodded, too tired to do anythin' but keep kissin' her.

When the water began to run cold, we parted, and before it started to freeze we quickly shampooed our hair, rinsed, and got out. I watched Beth wrap her towel under her arms and neatly loop it in place, then twist one around her head. She padded to the mirror and smeared a clear spot. Right away she caught me staring, in the middle of moisturising her face. "What?" Her smile was curious.

I rubbed my neck and felt my lip curl up, my face gettin' hot. "Thanks for washin' me."

She winked, and went back to rubbing her face. "Thanks for fucking my brains out, Dixon."

I laughed. "Anytime, darlin'. Anythin' ya need, I'm your guy." I froze. _Did I just said that out loud?_

Judging from the pleased expression on her face, I'd bet yeah, I did. Oddly enough, I meant it. Maybe this thin' we had together wasn't so bad.

As I limped back to the bedroom, holdin' the walls for support, waving Beth back when she followed to help me, I thought that maybe I'd been too hasty in thinkin' that Beth'd be better off with someone else. If I were to be honest with myself, I was becomin' rather selfish were she was concerned; just the thought of her bein' _near _another man made my chest hurt, and not from my broken ribs. Beth was mine, damn it. She was mine to protect and provide for. We were a team, we were partners, we were... Lovers. _Holy shit_.

I'd fuckin' fallen in love with Beth.

I'd also forgotten my towel, and I stood there in the middle of the room, sagging against the bed, drippin' water all over the carpet. The breeze from the window was warm, but goosebumps skittered over my skin anyway. I looked at the floor, and saw a basket of clean clothes, _my _clean clothes, folded inside. She'd even done my goddamn laundry.

I felt a cryin' jag comin' on but I forced it back, viciously. I would _not _cry, damn it, I wouldn't. Her selflessness was awesome, and I would never begrudge her that. She'd cared for me, healed my broken body, and fed me on her own for three weeks. Done the laundry, watched over me, and washed that body, even though she didn't hafta. Most of all, she'd shared herself with me, sated my apetite, and given me not one gift, but two: her virginity, and a sense of self-worth - a purpose. And when I was fully recovered, I would continue to look after her, and take the burden of providin' for us off her hands. It was the least I could do, after all she'd done for me. Hell, after all she'd done for me, I'd do anythin' for that girl. _Anythin'_.

I loved her. So help me God, I loved her, and that realisation scared the shit outta me, because ever'thin' I'd ever loved had been taken from me. I was extremely reluctant to tell her, for fear of jinxing myself and losin' her forever. Which, I knew, was terrible of me to do, when she deserved so much better'n that. She deserved to be loved fully, unconditionally, wholly. I wasn't sure I could do all that... I wasn't strictly a lovin' man, as it were. I knew I was awful at showin' it, and I knew if I allowed what was growing between us to go on, that things would just get worse because I was so fucked up inside and would just end up pissin' her off and pushing her away, regardless of the _insanely _great sex. That was another thin'. Mind-blowing sex, as much as I fuckin' loved it, usually led to babies, and right now, in this world, babies were _not _a good idea. I remembered little Judith, and my heart lurched.

I sat down on the edge of the bed, starin' into space, lost in thought. Beth walked in and I didn't even notice she'd called me three times until she reached out to touch my face.

"Daryl!"

I jumped. "What?"

She stood over me, smoothin' the wrinkle between my brows with her thumb. "Whatcha thinking about?"

I blinked, then returned my gaze the the carpet. _I'm thinkin' 'bout what the hell I'm gonna do 'bout my feelin's for ya._

"Nothin'." I wanted to kill myself. Her legs filled my vision. A dribble of blood smeared her left inner thigh, rollin' toward her knee. I reached out to her.

"You're bleedin'."

"I am?" She looked, bracing her hand on my shoulder for balance. "So I am. Huh. Doesn't hurt."

I looked away. I knew why she was bleedin', and her lack of pain didn't lessen my guilt. I'd made her bleed because I'd used her too hard in the shower. That was another thin' about me: I hurt ever'thin' I loved, whether I meant to or not.

"I hope that look doesn't mean you think this is your fault, Daryl."

I looked at her, my anger spillin' out before I could put a lid on it. "It obviously is my damn fault, Beth, unless some other sick asshole just "fucked your brains out"." My tone was hard.

To my total shock, she slapped me. Not hard, but enough to throw me off kilter. She pointed her finger in my face, and her face was deadly serious.

"You shut the fuck up, Daryl Dixon. You did fuck my brains out, and I loved every minute of it. And as long as you quit trying to screw everything up, you'll continue to fuck my brains out. Will that be a problem for you?"

Stunned, my mouth gawpin' open like a fish, I stared at her. _What the fuck'd just happened...?_

"Daryl, listen. My body was built for this kind of thing. Someday it'll go through much worse. Hell, I've made _myself _bleed more than this, remember?" She held out her wrist so I could see her scar. "Quit being such a downer. I'm very happy with what we just did, and it distresses me that you're having second thoughts."

My frown came back. "I'm ain't havin' second thoughts, alright? I just... Don't like hurtin' ya, is all."

She sat down next to me, one hand gripping my arm, the other restin' on my damp thigh. Her lips brushed my stubbled cheek. "As long as great sex is the only punishment you inflict on me, I'll consider myself lucky." She grinned against my face then blew gently in my ear. "Now, stand up for me, and I'll bind those ribs. They're probably aching after that excellent performance, huh?"

In spite of myself, I laughed. "Fine. Ya get your way. This time." I raised a brow at her. She was a big miracle in a small package, my Beth.

I stood up, and she bound me tightly in old strips of bedsheet, and tied me off. Then, she said, "I'm going to go see what's left for us to eat. Are you feeling up to hunting yet? There's some painkillers if you're still too sore."

I stared at her. She was so... In charge. It felt weird, because _I _was always in charge, 'fore. I guess these past three weeks had given her a sense of duty to me, like I felt to her. It was nice, but it was time for me to step back into my role of hunter and protector. Besides, as nice as it was here, we'd have to move on soon, as soon as I was fully healed, ideally. Which shouldn't be much longer. I knew bones took at least six weeks, but winter was comin', and this place just wasn't fortified enough, and the nearest forest was half-mile away across open fields, and with no cover, crossin' them was a dumb move, 'less it was absolutely necessary. The corn field would provide cover, but the bean fields left us exposed. Runnin' into a walker in the corn would more'n likely be fatal, if we happened to panic. I mentally thanked God that herds were far and few between, and that there was a river 'tween us and the herd from the prison.

I dressed and hobbled downstairs. Lookin' out the windows, it was a beautiful day outside, too nice to be feelin' sorry for myself, so I went out to the back porch and, findin' an old muskoka chair, rested my bones in it.

From where I sat, I could see the barn, the driving shed, and the treeline which connected them. Behind the barn, quite some distance away, I noticed for the first time several steel silos and a large elevator, and wondered if'n there were any trucks there for haulin' all that grain... Somethin' that big would certainly go a long way towards keep us safe from walkers, and I wanted to go back to the prison - if only to see if there were any other survivors still kickin' 'round.

I rested my foot on my knee so I could scratch my itchy stitches, which could likely come out now. Pulling out my knife, I used the point to sever the knots, and pulled the thread out of my skin. It smarted, 'cause they'd been in too long, but like a bandaid, sometimes ya just had to rip it off and be done with it. The healed skin on the backs of my thighs stretched, itchy, as I leaned over my leg to reach the stitches on the other side of my calf.

_Rick, Carl... Maggie and Glenn... Ever'one. Where were they now?_

Beth opened the door and interrupted my train of thought, handin' me a bowl of canned peaches and a spoon.

"Hm, thanks Beth." I laid into the fruit like I hadn't eaten in months.

Beth sat on the top step and watched me, closely; I could feel her eyes borin' into me. Probably waitin' to see if I'd faint, or somethin'. She was such a mother hen.

So what she said when she opened her mouth surprised me, again. I needed to learn to quit thinkin' that I knew what she would come out with next. If anyone knew anyone, she knew me better than I knew myself. I didn't seem to know shit, not since I woke up, anyway.

"You want to leave, don't you." It wasn't a question.

I shrugged, secretly perturbed by her accurate guess. "Maybe."

She looked away toward the corn field behind the barn and replied, "No, not maybe. I know that look. You want to move on."

I slurped down the last peach and belched. "I didn't say nothin' 'bout movin' on. Do _you _wanna leave?" My tone was a tad petulant, but I waited on tenterhooks for her answer.

She turned back to me. "No, not really. I like it here. I like running water, a roof over my head - a functioning toilet. I like having a place to make food, and a place to sleep at night. Most of all... I like sleeping next to you, in a real bed, instead of on the ground, watching the woods, waiting for the next walker to pop up and try take you from me."

I stopped slurpin' up the peach juice in my bowl and looked at her. "I know the amenities here are nice, Beth, but be realistic. It ain't safe enough here for ya, and if somethin' happened to ya while I was away huntin'..." I couldn't finish the sentence. I didn't have the words.

She got up and took my bowl, set it on the floor. Then, she climbed into my lap as if she'd done it all her life, without hesitation or fear. Like she belonged there and had ever' right. Which, I 'sposed, she did. She just hadn't heard the words from me yet.

"Look, I know you think I'm just a girl who needs all the help she can get. I know what a chore it's been for you to put up with me, and look out for me, and I appreciate all that, very much. But I'm not an idiot, Daryl. I didn't spend the last three weeks tapping my heels together and making besties in Oz. I spent them taking care of the bravest man I know. I almost lost you - twice - and it scared me to death. I've never had so much responsibility before, not even when I was looking after Judith. She, at least, weighs a hell of a lot less, and was never so much work to move around," she laughed. I gripped her backside and waited patiently for her to finish.

"What I'm trying to say is, I know that I'm not the easiest person to get along with, or the smartest, or the bravest. Everything I learned, I learned from you, Daryl. You taught me to love life again. When you're teasing me... it's the best feeling. And the sex, well... I think we can both agree that that should be a permanent part of our relationship, unless I miss my guess. So, making a long story short - too late - I want you to know that I'm grateful for everything you've done, and... I love you." She rested her head in the curve of my neck and kissed it.

I knew that, I did, she'd told me that before, but I couldn't bring myself to tell her what she wanted to hear yet. I wanted to; I wanted to believe we could defy the odds and make it on our own, but I knew that was impossible. A tiny voice in the back of my head whispered that I should at least try.

"Beth, I... I'm not a good man. I... Fuck." I wanted to get up, but her weight held me down, and my ribs protested when I tried to move. Her face took on a sad slant.

"Don't you get it? You _are _a good man, Daryl!" She threw her hands up in exasperation, then grabbed my cheeks between her palms. "You were willing to _die _to protect me from those men! Do you know how that made me feel? Treasured. Precious. Like I meant something more to you than just another mouth to feed. You are the most selfless, thoughtful, fucking frustrating-" she smiled, "-Most wonderful man I've ever known. And the fact that you think you aren't good enough blows my mind. In our camp, when it comes to good people, you were second only to Rick, do you hear me? Hell, I think if you'd been in charge, things would have been just as good or better, even. I don't know why you think you're such a terrible person, Daryl, because to me... You're the best. You're my hero." She sniffled. "You're my whole fucking world."

My own eyes felt moist, and I pulled her to me in a fierce hug, and before either of us knew it, her arms were wrapped around my neck like a vice and mine were around her back, squashin' her to me. She scrabbled to get her legs around my waist, pressin' herself close enough that we could have been one. 'Tween us, my cock sprang to life.

'Tween kisses, I whispered, "But... What if... I lose ya, Beth?... What the fuck... do I do then?"

We parted to breathe, and she rested her forehead against mine, her fingers deep in my hair. "You can't think like that, Daryl. You can't." She kissed my bruised eyes. "Just cherish what you have, for as long as you have it. Worry about that other shit when you have to, and cross that bridge when you come to it. Live in the now, and fuck the rest."

She was right. Beth might be a young woman, but she was wise beyond her years. She was absolutely right, and the only person who stood in the way of my happiness, was me. It was time for me to grab life by the balls and start livin' it like each day was my last.

"Beth, I... " My mouth was fastened to her neck, and my words were muffled by her skin, "I ain't never told this to another woman before... You're right, darlin'. But you're wrong, too."

She pulled back to look into my eyes, her brow slightly creased in curiosity. "I am?"

I nodded. "Yep. Ya are smart. And brave. And pickin' fights with ya is some of the best time I ever spent. Did I ever tell ya that ya saved me, Beth?"

Her head shook, and her lips trembled.

"Bein' with ya has given me a purpose, Beth, a reason to keep fightin'. I was really messed up, for a long time. I'm still messed up. Did ya hear any of what I said to Joe in the barn?"

Slowly, she nodded.

"It was all true. My old man was a sick, drunk fuck, and he did thin's to Merle and me... Beth, he did awful thin's. And I'm 'fraid that... That I'll do awful thin's, too, ya know? Merle did bad thin's, not to women, but he went to jail a lot for it. I never did nothin', but I've killed, Beth. I've killed and enjoyed it, so help me God, I did, but I did it to protect ya, and I'm sorry I liked it, I'm sorry-"

Beth's tears had begun to roll, and she pulled my head to her chest, comforting me. I squeezed her back, as tight as I dared, my ribs screamin' but I ignored the pain. She was worth endurin' all the pain I'd ever endured, and more.

"Shh," She whispered, kissin' my brow. "I don't care about that, Daryl. You did what you had to do, and it was right. And... you don't have to say anything, alright?" Her fingers cupped my chin, and I narrowed my eyes, confused.

"I know I told you I loved you before, and... I just needed you to know. You don't have to say anything about it, okay? I'm not going to push you to admit to something you don't want to. But if it's all the same to you, if we don't fuck right now, I may have to kill you, so take me to bed, big guy, or lose me forever." She grinned.

I grinned back. It wasn't that I didn't want to admit I loved her, 'cause I did, with all I had. I just needed time to adjust to the idea. I _would _tell her, I promised myself that.

"Alright darlin', your wish is my command, but I'm gonna need a little help."

She laughed and hopped off me with an ease I envied. _Ohh, to be her age again..._

Beth grabbed my hands and hauled me outta the chair. "Come on, grandpa!"

I pinched her ass. "Hey! Easy with the old man barbs, baby girl."

She stuck her tongue in my ear. "As long as you promise not to go easy on me upstairs, it's a deal."

I snorted, but followed her inside. I had to give my Beth credit; like me, she liked her lovin' hard. As I stripped off her clothes and she pushed me back onto the bed, I realised that I'd never been so happy in my whole life.

* * *

><p>We left the followin' week. Before we did, we scoured the house for anythin' useful, and the barn and driving shed, too. There was a tractor in the shed, and some other machinery, but none of 'em had any gas in them. Beth showed me the matches she'd nabbed 'fore my encounter with Joe, and when we departed the house in which we'd spent the past month, many good memories under our belts, I felt confident that we'd do just fine this winter. We had the matches for fires, canned food and preserves to eat when fresh food was scarce, some new knives, and extra clothes. We took the winter gear we found, mitts and boots, coats. We took as much personal gear as we could carry, in Beth's case, "tamps" and toilet paper, heh, and in mine, ointments and drugs.<p>

It was harder'n I'd thought it would be to leave the place behind. We stood and looked up at the house for a few moments, the coolin' afternoon breeze blowin' my growing hair into my eyes. I didn't move til Beth finally slipped her fingers through my free hand and her lips pressed against my neck.

"Ready?"

I looked at her. "Yeah. C'mon." Keepin' her hand, we walked side by side toward the corn field and the grain elevator I'd seen winkin' at me in the sun the previous week. As we passed the barn one last time, I saw Joe's corpse, face-down and rotten in the mud next to the field. I didn't say anythin', and Beth didn't even look; then we were in the corn and I took point, lettin' go of her hand to hold my crossbow ready, just in case we encountered some company among the seven-foot stalks.

We were half-way through when Beth asked, "Do you think there'll be any trucks there?"

I shrugged. "I hope so. Trucks with gas'd be even better. How ya doin' back there?"

She sniffed. "So far so good."

I nodded. "Alright then."

We were fifty feet from the edge of the field when I held up my hand, the signal for her to stop and make no sound. I heard a rustlin', and felt her hand snake under my jacket to grip my shirt. Slowly, trying to make as little noise as possible, we inched forward.

Reaching the last few rows, I could see empty space around the elevator, dusty gravel lanes and a puddle here and there. Maybe ten walkers roamed 'tween us and the office near the scale.

Beth tried to stand next to me but I pushed her back.

"Do you see anything?"

I chewed my lip. "Yeah, I see a bunch of goons 'tween us and that elevator. Don't see no trucks, neither." _Damn_.

She sighed. "Now what?"

I looked at the office, the scale, the grain spout... And spied a rail car, visible just past the elevator. _Tracks_...

If railway tracks ran behind this elevator... maybe they led back past the prison - there had been a set of tracks that ran near it. Rick and I had been followin' 'em the day we found the prison, in fact, huntin' for more food.

When Beth and I fled the prison after the Governor's attack, we'd headed in a mostly westerly direction. If memory served me right, and it usually did, there was a chance that if we followed these tracks east, they could take us back over the river we'd crossed, and back by the prison. We needed to find the others; Beth's sister, Maggie, and Rick. I had to know what'd happened to him and Carl. Rick was our leader, the soul of our group. Without his leadership to unite us, we would be forever splintered. At one time in my life, long separations from others hadn't been a problem, more of a relief, really, kinda like a sabbatical, if ya will. I can't exactly say I'd enjoyed all that time I'd spent alone with my brother; he tended to be an asshole at the best of times. Still, we'd learned a lot on our own, and tested our wits against nature. We'd done alright. But a chance to reunite with those who had become like family... I found myself relishing that. Hope began to grow in me again.

"Well?"

I blinked, jerked from my thoughts. A walker paused near us, sniffin' the air, and I gripped my bow, ready. The wind changed direction, and it wandered off as we watched. I relaxed a bit.

Beth slipped both her hands under my jacket, pressin' her body as flush to my back as my huge pack would allow, clasping her hands around my waist. "Daryl?"

I stroked her knuckles with my left hand, my bow saggin' in my right. Her fingers were chilly. "I'm thinkin'... We should follow those tracks."

I pointed when she leaned around me to look. She nodded.

"Alright. How are we going to get over there?"

I scratched my face, itchy from my growing beard. "That's a good question. I 'spose I could pick 'em off one by one." I eyed my four bolts, one in the barrel, three in the quiver, skeptically. I had two knives; I used to have a .38. I wished I still did. Or Tony's AK, but it was useless without ammo. Joe had used the last bullet when he'd shot my leg.

"We could do it together."

I made a face. That was too damn risky. I didn't like that suggestion at all, and told her so.

"Fuck no, woman, ya ain't goin' near them goons. I'll take care of 'em."

"You've got four bolts and a couple knives, Daryl. Please don't insult my intelligence. I know you can't take on six walkers with just a knife or two. And that's only if you don't miss the first four."

I turned to eye her authoritively. "Yeah? Well don't insult my 'bility to protect my woman."

Her expression melted from indignant to mollified. "Then by all means. Impress me." She leaned close to my ear. "But if you get in over your head, I'm coming after you, and there's nothing you can do about it."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "Fine. You provide a distraction, but _only _if I need one. That clear?"

She flashed her teeth at me in a grin and held up her right hand. "On a bible I no longer have, I swear to God."

I grabbed the back of her head with my palm and kissed her hard, then took off into the lot, drawin' the attention of the three walkers nearest me.

The first went down easily with a bolt to the eye. The second was too close for me to reload, so she got a taste of my bowie knife as I sliced into her jaw and up into her brainstem. She dropped like a rock. I flicked her blood off the weapon, yanked the spent bolt from the first walker, slipped my foot into the stirrup, pulled the cable into the spring and reloaded the bolt just in time to nail the next customer.

Three more lumbered my way, and again, they were too close together for me to use any more than one more of my bolts. I was startin' to sweat. I stabbed one in the face, the next in the forehead, and felt the third grab me from behind. I tried to fling him off, but his rotten hand was caught in my pack strap and no matter how hard I spun to try to lose him, he clung tight, his jaws snappin' near my ear.

I grunted, tryin' to reach his head with my other knife, since he'd latched onto my right side, pinning the hand that had the bowie knife. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the last four staggerin' this way. _Damn_, I thought, _this is gettin' to be a tight spot._

I felt luke-warm goo splash my neck and shoulder, and the walker's body slumped to the ground.

Beth stood, heaving, her face grim. "Just can't admit when you need help, can you?" She moved to press her back to mine as we faced the oncomin' threat. The closest walker came at her, and I pushed her away, kickin' it in the knee, drivin' my knife into its head as it fell to its knees, my bow dropping to the ground as another swarmed me. I killed it in time to watch Beth pound her knife quickly into the next walker's eye, yank it out, drop-kick the last one in the gut, knockin' it on its ass, before stomping its face with the heel of her boot several times til it was still.

Brushing hair out of her eyes, she smiled and flicked her brows up at me. "You're welcome." Her hand rested on her hip, her blood-spattered clothes catchin' the sun. She was the sexiest thin' I'd ever seen.

I guffawed, shaking my head, but she was so proud of herself, I let her have her moment. "Ya did good, darlin'. I'm damn distracted." I kissed her, drawin' it out for over a minute. When I released her, her eyes had that _fuck-me-now _look in them. I grinned, and she swatted me.

I patted her cheek. "C'mon, let's jiggle on."

She snickered. I retrieved my bow and the bolts I'd spent and we walked quickly past the elevator, the temperature dropping dramatically in its shadow. Near the tracks, we went around three rail cars, linked end-to-end, careful to keep our eyes open for any more walkers, but so far the coast was clear.

With my fist I pounded one of the cars three times; it echoed.

"Hollow." Beth squinted at me.

I nodded. "Yeah. Guess the train didn't stick 'round to load up."

Beth shrugged, and we stepped over the rail to walk down the ties. "Which way?"

I pointed, shading my eyes from the mornin' sun. "That way. East."

"And this track might take us back past the prison?"

I shrugged this time. "It might. Hope it does. If not, let's hope it least leads us 'cross the river."

She shivered. "I take back what I said that day, when I wanted to be in the water again."

I chuckled. "Afternoons're still pretty warm. Ya might change your mind."

She raised her brow at me and the corner of her mouth lifted, saucy, as we started ploddin' east down the tracks. "I'll go swimmin' if you do."

I choked back a laugh, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention from whatever might be staggerin' around nearby; the vegetation on both sides of the tracks was closin' in, grown over, the further we travelled from the elevator. "I take off my clothes, I'll be doin' more'n just swimmin', girl."

She outright grinned at that. "Promise?"

I winked. "Cross m'heart, darlin'." I looked at her askance, smiling. "You're a horny little shit, ya know that?"

Beth dropped her jaw in mock surprise. I'd told her this once already, and she had agreed with me, her reason bein', I was "too fucking hot to resist." And of course, 'cause she loved me.

I'd laughed and said I'd go along with that. Then I'd licked her til she almost cried from pleasure.

"You're no better, Dixon. I can't even pull on my boots without seeing that look in your eye."

"What look?" I slung my bow over my shoulder, shiftin' my pack a little to the left. My ribs were still tender, but they were up to the job.

"You know what look. That look that tells me what you'd like to do to me while I'm already bent over."

I couldn't repress the smile that broke out on my lips, but I tried anyway. Starin' at the passing bushes and trees I mumbled under my breath, "It's your fault. If'n ya weren't so damn pretty..."

"What? What was that?"

"Nothin'."

"Was _not _"Nothin'." You think I'm pretty!"

I glared at her, but there was no malice in it. She'd stripped any malice from me when she'd saved my life. Any malice I had left was reserved for those who might try to hurt my woman. Crossin' me wouldn't end well for them.

"Do not. You're a knobby-kneed rag doll. Ain't nothin' pretty 'bout that."

She kept smiling and shakin' her head. "Nope. You're lying! You think I'm pretty! You want to date me! Ha!"

I bumped her shoulder. "Shh, you're loud." I turned my head to look at her as we walked. "I wanna do somethin' to ya, alright, and it don't involve no stupid date."

She made a surprised face, then smiled. "Do you, now? And just who, were you saying, was a horny shit?!"

I pursed my lips. "Smartass."

Beth laughed quietly. "You know it." She slid her fingers through mine, warming them despite the chill in the air. "You wouldn't have me any other way."

I leaned close to her ear and whispered, "I'll have ya _ever' _way, darlin'... Ya can bank on it." I flicked my tongue inside her ear.

She squealed a bit and swatted my shoulder. "You cheeky bugger!"

A branch snapped ahead. I froze. She did too, a fraction of a second after me. We waited.

Another crack. I unslung my bow. "Get behind me."

Beth did as she was told, and I felt her fingers catch around my belt. I couldn't decide if she kept a hold on me because she was afraid for me, or for her. I liked to think it was the former, 'cause I'd always protect her, and I knew she knew that.

We inched forward. I kept darting my eyes at the ground, watchin' where I stepped. There was a bend in the tracks ahead. We crept forward until we could see more past all the trees, dead leaves makin' it difficult to be quiet.

Several walkers were crowded in a huddle, eatin' somethin'. One was chewing on a bloody bone it had ripped off the carcass; that was the snappin' we'd heard. They hadn't noticed us yet.

I urged Beth into the cover of the scrub. "We gotta go 'round 'em. Watch your step, no noise. Get your knife out."

We gave them a wide berth, and kept to the woods for about a quarter mile. When we returned to the tracks, they'd curved again and were clear.

I released a breath I hadn't realised I'd been holdin'.

"That was gross, huh?"

I snorted. "Not even close to some of the shit I've seen."

Grabbin' my hand, Beth yanked back on my arm, diggin' in her heels deep enough that she stopped me. I was surprised by the strength behind her action. "What?"

Her eyes had a wild look, and they shone, tear-wet, but no tears rolled yet. Then she dropped her pack, and pulled mine off, too.

"What're ya do-" When I was free she leapt at me, wrappin' her arms 'round my neck and kissin' me like she'd never see me again.

I was confused, but I held her to me tightly, sensing her need to be close. _Had that encounter back there scared her that much?_

When she finally let me breathe again, she leaned her forehead against mine, and I let her slide down my body until her feet touched the ground.

"Sorry," she whispered, "I just really needed that."

I smiled against her hair. "S'alright. I don't mind." And I didn't. I rested my chin on top of her head, strokin' her arms to soothe her. "What was that all 'bout, anyway? Ya ain't scared of a bunch a goons munchin' a deer, are ya?"

Beth shook her head against my chest. "It's not that."

"Didn't think so. What is it, then?"

She looked up at me. "I was just thinking too much, I guess."

_Uh huh_... "About?" This line of questioning was like pullin' teeth.

"About... Maggie, mostly, and the others. Do you... do you think they made it, Daryl?"

Her eyes were like deep blue pools, glistenin' in the noon sun. The fear, the desperate hope, and the distress in her voice made my chest hurt.

"I dunno, darlin'." I rubbed her back. "But we gotta try. If they're out there... We'll find 'em."

She sniffled, and pressed her cheek to my heart. I rocked her a bit, kissed the top of her head. We really didn't have time to be standin' 'round mopin' but I kept my eyes out for danger until she was ready to go again.

Wipin' her eyes, she backed away. "Thanks."

I shrugged. "Anytime." Winked.

Beth smiled. I helped her get her pack back on, then lifted mine and my bow, and we moved on.

* * *

><p>We covered 'bout three miles that day. As the sun began to set, I kept my eye out for a rail bridge. In the not-too-far-off distance, I could hear water flowing.<p>

I built a small fire. The temperature dropped dramatically with the sinkin' of the sun, and Beth, sittin' across the fire from me in the winter coat she'd found, shivered. I was sittin' on a rock; she was on the ground. I bet it was chilly on her cute little backside.

I'd shot two squirrels and a rabbit after her little meltdown, and I'd skinned and spitted 'em, turnin' 'em over the flames every ten minutes or so, so the meat didn't burn. I'd found some wild rosemary growin' by the tracks and picked some to season the meager meal the critters'd provide.

Starin' into the flames, waitin' patiently for the meat to be done, Beth spoke for the first time in a while. It drew me out of my trance; the flames could be hypnotic, sometimes. I rested my chin on the stock of my bow heavily.

"I was so angry at you."

I blinked. "What?"

Her eyes flicked up to mine. "When you left with Merle, just after Judith was born."

I looked at my feet. "Weren't the best decision I ever made, I admit. But what does that gotta do with anythin'?"

She rested her chin on her arm and ignored my question. "Why did you do it? We needed you, Daryl... Carol was heartbroken." Her face was sad. "I mean, I know if it were Maggie I'd have probably done the same thing, but Maggie is a lot different than Merle was. I know he was your brother, but..."

I chewed my lip. "He was on the wrong side, I know, but... He was my family." I knew that answer was pathetically inadequate, but it was all I had to give her. I felt like she was backin' me into a corner with this little interrogation and my tone reflected that. _Where was all this comin' from, anyway?_

Beth met my gaze over the flames, held it. "_We _are your family, Daryl. We love you more than your brother ever could have. I've watched you grow from an insecure redneck to a responsible, integral part of the group. A leader. People look up to you. _I _look up to you. Hell, you're ten feet tall and bullet-proof. You _have _to know how valued you are by us. How loved. We'd be lost without you."

Despite my slightly raised hackles, her praise felt good. Damn good. Still, I needed to know where she was goin' with this - it was so outta left field.

"I do know." I rubbed my chin. "Didn't ya ever wonder why I came back so fast? I knew where I belonged. It just took me a little while to make Rick understand that." I spit on the ground near the fire. "That, and it only took me a day and a half alone with 'im to remember what an asshole my brother could be." I smiled a little.

"I didn't wanna leave, Beth. I didn't. But Rick wasn't thinkin' straight - I hadn't seen Merle in almost a year. Thought the sumbitch was dead all that time, then, to find 'im alive - and in the enemy's camp - it was hard. I knew he'd never betray me. We were all each other'd ever had, Merle and me. Was just us against the world for a long time. I know, he never knew when to shut up, and he rubbed a lot of folks the wrong way, but he was still my brother."

Beth listened intently, watching my face.

"And ya gotta admit, he did right by us, when all was said and done. Merle sacrificed himself for us. Before all this... he never woulda done that, Beth. Maybe not even for me. But he gave us a chance, and I'm proud of 'im for that. I'd give anythin' to have him back, but... He went out on his own terms. In a blaze of glory. He wouldn'ta wanted to go any other way."

"I'm sorry, Daryl."

I looked away.

"You miss him, don't you?"

I nodded. "Ever' day."

She nodded, too. "I miss Maggie. I miss her so much... God." She tipped her head back to contain her brimmin' tears. So _that _was what this was all 'bout. I sighed silently in relief. For a minute there I thought we were about to have our first serious fight.

"C'mere, darlin'." I held out my arm.

She rounded the fire, snuggled close into my side. I regretted how cold it was; I wanted to warm her up in a better way than just rubbin' her arms, but we both needed sleep - unfortunately we'd not get it at the same time. One of us always had to be on watch at night. I'd take the first one, let her get some shut-eye. She needed it more'n I did. She needed the food, too. When it was cooked I gave her the bigger share. She was so fuckin' skinny.

After she'd finished eatin', she said, "I was there when he tried to follow you to the meeting with the Governor. Did anyone ever tell you how anxious he was to go after you? Glenn wouldn't let him go, and they got into it... He got the upper hand and Michonne and my sister were on him so fast... I had to fire off a shot to get them all to stop fighting."

I looked down at the top of her head, coppery in the firelight. "Naw. No one ever told me that."

She leaned her temple against my neck. "He had a funny way of showing it, but I know he loved you. We could all see that. I think that was the only reason Rick let him stay."

"Merle and I saved Rick's life when we came back."

"I know, but I don't think that's why Rick let him in. He knew it would make you happy. No matter how much he disliked Merle, he did that for _you_."

I sighed. "Rick's been the brother I always wished I'd had. I shoulda tried harder to get him to let Merle in... I shouldn't'a walked away."

"It all worked out in the end."

"No, it didn't. Not for Merle. Or your Dad, and a bunch of others, for that matter. We're out here, alone, because all Merle's effort did was buy us time." My brow came down a bit. "He didn't save us from the real danger; Michonne tried, and I shoulda used that time to help her find that bastard Governor. Like I said before, that's on me."

"Maybe... But his sacrifice saved you - then. The fact that it saved the rest of us, too, was just an upside. He did it for _you_, Daryl, because at his end, he loved you more than he loved himself. Like a brother should. I wasn't particularly fond of him, but I appreciate what he did, and if I could, I'd thank him for it. My own brother did the same. I know what it feels like." She sniffed. "And nobody's blaming you for that, Daryl. You couldn't have known that all of this would happen."

I'd forgotten about Shawn, Beth's brother. I squeezed her shoulders.

"Get some sleep, darlin'. Ain't no point to re-hashin' shit we can't change."

"True." She rested her cheek over my heart. "I can't bring my Daddy back. Or Shawn, or anyone else. But I'll never forget them. That would be the real tragedy. Their sacrifices have to mean _something_. We have to keep fighting, or their deaths will have been in vain. I can't take the thought of my Daddy dying for nothing, Daryl. I just can't." She started to sob quietly.

I kissed her crown. "Shh, darlin'. Don't think of that, now. Go to sleep, baby girl. I'll watch over ya."

_And try not to dwell on how awful I feel for my part in this whole disaster._

* * *

><p>I let her sleep all night, tucked in my arms, keepin' her warm. The fire died after a while and I let my eyes unfocus in the dark.<p>

I got that she'd been missin' her sister, and that was why she'd brought all that shit up, but it opened old wounds I'd thought were healing. Guess they weren't; thinkin' of those we'd both lost brought tears to my eyes. Merle, Hershel. I stared at my hand in the dark. Those wounds still festered.

I'd told Michonne ages ago to give up runnin' off to look for the Governor. After we'd found Karen by the roadside hiding from the corpses of her fellow townspeople, people who'd been ruthlessly cut down, I was sure we'd never see that bastard again. We'd taken in their people; Tyreese and Sasha told us the Governor had never returned to Woodbury.

I shoulda known better. Michonne did. But because I refused to help her in favour of a false sense of security, he'd come back to bite us in the ass, hard. Because of him, I didn't know if I'd ever see anyone I loved again.

What surprised me most wasn't the fact that the Governor came back; I was shocked as hell that Beth didn't hate me for bein', at least in part, to blame for her father's death. I couldn't wrap my mind 'round it. If'n I were her, I'd hate my fuckin' guts for what I'd done (or rather, _not _done). I hated myself, anyway. I had a lot of regrets in my life, but this was by far the biggest one. Because I'd thought Michonne should let go of her fanatical vendetta and move on, I'd let the Governor live to gather a new army. That was on me. It was also one of the reasons I'd tried to take such good care of Beth since the attack. I owed it to Hershel to keep his little girl alive. I'd no right to fall in love her, but I did, God help me. I didn't deserve her love, neither, yet I had it. Whoever coined the phrase, "God works in mysterious ways" sure knew what the hell they were talkin' 'bout.

_I should tell her I love 'er, 'fore it's too late_.

_But how can I do that? _It was selfish of me to love her after what had happened. She was young and foolish, and probably only thought she was in love with me for savin' her. But I loved her, too. I guess we were both fools. I was pretty sure that what'd sprung up 'tween us wasn't borne of redemption - not on my part. It went deeper'n forgiveness. With Beth... It was like those thin's were automatically given, no questions asked. I wondered if the fact that I was partly to blame had even crossed her mind. And what she'd do when it did. I knew I should man-up and ask her, but I didn't wanna risk what I had, even if I didn't deserve it. That was my self-preservation peepin' out again. I shook my head. Stubborn to the bitter end, that was me.

I remembered the last thin's she said to me, and realised that she knew; she knew, and had already forgiven me. I was just a little slow to catch up.

I kissed her hair in the dark. She shifted under my arm, then settled, her breathin' still even. This was exactly the reason she had to be kept alive. People like Beth were one in a million. Infinately precious. She was the best humanity had to offer, and it was up to me to keep her safe. This... this _thin'_... that had happened to the world, this plague of death, it hadn't broken her. She'd seen such awful shit, but she didn't let it change her opinion of people. She didn't let it taint her. Her purity of heart was almost too much for this world to bear. Anythin' and ever'thin' had to be done to preserve that.

I blinked. Her purity had even changed me. I was softer than I was before, but not weaker. Knowin' her would never make me weaker. If anythin', it only made me stronger.

I had to admit, the group, and ever' member in it, had had an effect on me. Taught me somethin'. Rick'd taught me leadership; Hershel'd taught me wisdom. Maggie and Glenn had taught me that love would always find a way. Michonne'd taught me tenacity; Carol had taught me strength. And Beth... Beth'd taught me that there was more to life than just survival; she'd shown me that there was still so much worth savin'. Live people may be far and few between, but 'cause of her, I knew that they weren't all bad, that I couldn't paint ever'one I met with the same cynical brush. My instinct'd never failed me, but sometimes my attitude pushed people away, and now, in this new world, no matter who ya were or how smart ya were, ya couldn't make it alone. Not anymore.

The forest 'round me began to brighten, first to grey, and then to soft pink as the sun tipped the horizon. I yawned.

I was more tired'n I thought, but I'd be alright. Beth strirred beside me.

"Mmm... Is it morning?"

I smiled. "Yeah." A touch of frost had formed, and crystal facets sparkled wherever light touched them. It was beautiful.

Beth stretched. "Why didn't you wake me for watch?"

I shrugged. "Ya needed the sleep."

I stared at her as she sat up and pulled her hair over her shoulder, shakin' it out and givin' her scalp a good scratch before braiding it up again. When she was done she smiled at me. "What's so interesting, big guy?"

I shook my head. After a moment, I replied, "That looked like it felt good."

"It did." She stood up, crackin' her back. I'd slid off my rock onto the ground through the night, and she stepped 'hind me to sit on it, her knees bracketin' my shoulders. I rolled my head back as her fingers delved into my dirty hair. My eyes slid shut.

Beth's fingers slowly explored my scalp, massagin' it skillfully. It felt too good for words. After a while she began to gently use her nails. I was too relaxed by this point to be embarrassed by how much shit she was likely collectin' under 'em, my hair was so nasty. The only upside was that it was so gross, it kept the lice at bay. They liked clean hair. I wasn't an ideal candidate for an infestation.

Now Beth, she tried to keep her hair as clean as possible, as a woman'll do. If she ever picked 'em up, I knew how to make a wash outta larkspur to get rid of 'em.

"You hungry?"

Her question pulled me outta my sleepy stupor. "Always."

She laughed. "I'll see what I've got in my bag."

A while later I'd polished off two cans of peaches, belched, and been scowled at for my terrible manners. I just grinned at Beth as she delicately ate her peaches like a proper lady - as proper as she could usin' her fingers, that is.

Stretchin' myself, I stood up. "Ready?"

She nodded. "Yep."

I helped her up, her chest pressin' against mine as I kissed her good mornin', long and deep. "Get your shit, darlin', and let's move out."

Beth wiped her bottom lip discreetly, a small smile lingering around her mouth. "Too bad we haven't found another house to bunk in."

I hauled my pack over my shoulder, slingin' my bow over the other. "How so, honey?"

"Because when you kiss me like that, I get a huge case of the hornies."

I burst out laughin', then made an effort to be more quiet. "Say _what_?! Ha ha! Holy shit, Beth, you're gonna get me killed, spountin' off shit like that."

She grinned. "I please to aim." Winked.

I shook my head and wiped my eye, then reached for her hand. "C'mon, ya little laugh-riot. Let's go."

* * *

><p>Another half hour following the tracks saw us to the bridge I'd been hopin' for. When it finally came into view, I pointed. "Look there."<p>

Beth grinned at me. I waggled my brows. "Don't never let anyone tell ya Daryl Dixon don't know where the fuck he's goin'. That'll be the Yellowjacket down there."

She laughed. "I never doubted you."

I winked, held out my arm to slow her. "Quiet now, we don't know who's about."

Beth nodded, palming her knife, ready. I loaded a bolt into my bow and we approached the bridge, cautiously.

The sound of water was clear, and it was loud enough to drown out almost ever' other sound. Reachin' the edge on our side, I looked down.

The water was deep here. Back where we'd crossed it had been shallow, but here there was white water, and as it flowed north, this little gorge expanded quite a bit. It was narrow, but deep. I'd bet the fall was at least eighty feet.

The bridge itself was rickety to begin with, I think. As I looked closer, I could see the rotten ties and rusted, flakin' tracks. With no trees overhead to keep off the rain, and a near-constant mist from below, this section had deteriorated much faster than the rest. It was probably almost sixty feet across, and here and there, I could just make out missin' ties 'tween the tracks. Several spikes had worked their way up outta the wood. It was most definately a death-trap.

"Well? What's the verdict?"

I looked down the gorge both ways. To the south, way down, past all the scrub growin' over the edges, there was a mossy log spanning the distance between sides. I raised my brow. I'd rather cross a rickety rail bridge than attempt to cross a branch-covered, slippery log. To the north, the gorge got wider, so all I could see down that way was rock walls and rapids.

I pointed with the bow. "There's a log down there."

Beth made a face.

I shrugged. "Bridge it is, then." She made to step out, but I held her back. "Ladies last, this time."

She raised her brow at me. "What a gentleman." Her tone was slightly tart.

"Damn straight, woman. Somethin's gonna happen, it'll happen to me."

Her face fell blank. "No. You can't-"

"Yes. I can. Now ya stay behind me, and ya step where I step. This bridge's a piece of shit, ya hear? We go slow."

I stepped out, testing my weight on the first tie. It held. I kept goin'.

Things went smooth until about halfway across. When the tie under my foot gave, I never heard a thin', just felt myself drop. I did hear Beth scream, though, and right in my damn ear, too.

I winced when I landed, one leg dangling, my still-tender ribs screamin'. My gut had broken my fall, that and my pack was slightly too wide to fit through the hole I'd made. My other leg was bent.

Beth kept screamin' until she realised I wasn't fallin' anymore, and started gasping. "Oh my God! Daryl, are you okay?!" Her cries continued to reverberate down the gorge eerily, the water drownin' 'em out quickly.

"Erg. Yeah." My gut smarted like a sonofabitch. Like a rock had been dropped on me. The weight of the pack on my back certainly wasn't helpin', either. As soon as I landed, I felt her tryin' to keep me from fallin' through, pulling back on any part of my pack she could get a grip on.

"I'm fine. Back up - easy. Lemme get up." I'd dropped my crossbow; it had landed four feet away, the heavier stock dangling over the edge of the bridge. The strap, caught on a popped-up spike, was the only thin' keepin' it from goin' over.

I tried to haul my ass up, but it was more difficult than I anticipated. While I was strugglin', I happened to look up. A thin column of smoke rose above the trees; campfire smoke. My gut sank. Anyone within a half-mile woulda heard Beth's screams. _Shit_.

Finally, I was standin' again. Beth asked, "Are you hurt?"

I was, but she didn't need to know that. I could feel blood tricklin' down my leg, but it hadn't stained through my pants yet. It could wait til we were on solid ground again, at any rate.

"Nah, I'm good."

She tried to step around me, check my chest, but I stopped her. "Don't get ahead of me, we don't know how solid the rest of these ties are. Stay back there, goddammit." My tone was harsher'n I'd meant it to be.

Her face crumpled a bit, but she tightened it up and just nodded. I tested the ties again as I moved to rescue my bow. When I picked it up, the spike came up with the strap, fallin' out 'fore I could catch it. It bounced 'tween the ties and fell through, hittin' the water four seconds later. We both watched it fall.

"C'mon. Time to go."

Her hand reached under my jacket to snag my belt again. I smiled to myself.

Before we reached the other side, a walker'd stumbled outta the scrub by the railside, gurglin' at us wetly. A big metal fox trap bit into one of her legs, chewin' deep into the rotten muscle. Black gunk oozed down over her bare foot. The other dragged, the skin scraped away by friction and decay. Her arms dangled, and her hair covered a bloody, mangled face. She'd drooled black all down the front of her dress through her broken jaws.

Stepping carefully, I picked my way toward her. She tripped on the track and landed face-down, the trap catchin' in the weeds growing there. She was stuck.

"What a fuckin' beauty queen," I drawled, pulling my knife. Beth didn't make a sound as I leaned over to stab her forehead as we walked by. The silence afterward was stifling.

On this side of the gorge, the tracks cut through higher ground, so trees grew on an incline on both sides of the tracks. We were in a tunnel, basically, of dead trees. Leaves crunched underfoot, loud in the stillness. No wind stirred. I tried to find the smoke I'd seen out on the bridge, but there were too many trees. It was dark down here.

Spyin' a rock, I moved toward it. My shoe was fillin' with blood, and I was starting to get sick of knowin' what that felt like. Once was enough.

Beth followed me, and, seein' the front of me for the first time in almost forty-five minutes, she frowned. "Your pants are bloody."

I sat, heavily. My pack tumbled off and landed with a thud in the dirt. "I know."

She knelt before me. "Why didn't you say anything?"

I looked at her. She sighed, exasperated. "Let me see."

I said, "Then help me up."

She did, and I unbuckled my belt and dropped my pants. The air was cool, but that didn't stop my erection. _Thank God._

Ignoring my growin' cock, she reached out to touch the scrape on my thigh. "Jeez, Daryl, what a mess. I wish you'd said something."

"Why? Nothin' ya coulda done 'bout it out there, anyway." As she bent closer to inspect the damage, any pain I was feelin' started to ebb away. I smirked. _Thank you, endorphins_. _Was it sad that I used any excuse to show her my junk? Hehe_.

"No, but maybe we could have compressed it." She applied pressure the skin next to it, to see how far the wound would open. A fresh gush of blood eeked out.

"What did you cut yourself on?"

I winced as she pulled it open again. "I dunno. Didn't even feel the pain, just the blood. Didn't hear the tie break, neither."

"Well, rotten wood tends to disintegrate." She ripped another strip off the bottom of her shirt, and wiped away the blood that was startin' to matte, dryin', in my hair. That smarted, too. When she'd gotten off as much as she could, she said, "Hold that."

I held the rag to my wound, tightly. She hadn't said a word, or even looked at my cock. It was mildly disappointin'.

Tearin' off another strip, she stood up and threw it over my shoulder. "Wait here." She jogged up the hill toward some pines, lookin' for sap, I assumed. I wanted to sit down again 'cause my leg was startin' to feel really sore, but I stubbornly bore the pain. I was no pussy, damn it.

Beth came back a few minutes later, a big gob of sap dripping from her knife. Pullin' off the cloth, I hissed through my teeth as she applied it to my wound, spreading it with difficulty.

When she was satisfied, she folded the cloth over my shoulder into a pad, usin' the soiled cloth to tie it tight over my wound. She was smart, my Beth; it was both a compress and tourniquet. I pulled my pants back up and she eased me back down onto the rock.

"Thanks, darlin'." I leaned back, more exhausted than I'd thought.

She squatted next to me. "Next time we cross something dangerous, we do it together. You hear me?"

I raised my head. "What?"

Her finger whipped up and she stuck it in my face. "I almost lost you back there, because you always insist on going first. What would I do without you, huh? Fuck, Daryl! You scared the hell out of me! I refuse to-"

"Ya'd do just fine, Beth." I cut her off. "I went first 'cause if'n that tie'd broke under your weight, your skinny butt woulda slipped right through. It's my job to protect _you_, Beth, not the other way 'round! So drop it. We ain't riskin' your life any more than we hafta, so suck it up, goddammit!"

My tone was hard. Her face took on a furious cast, her lips pinched shut tightly, her brow stubborn. If looks could kill, I'd be a smokin' pile of nuclear waste.

I swatted her pointed finger aside and pointed my own. "I ain't gonna lose ya again, Beth. You are gonna live. You're gonna beat this thin', and you're gonna do it 'cause I'm gonna do my damndest to make sure ya survive, ya got it? I'll die before I let anythin' happen to ya again."

She tried to speak but I covered her mouth.

"Nope, you shut up and ya listen. You are a gift, Beth, to this world. Humanity can't survive without people like you, ya understand? I won't stand by and let ya try to put me first when I don't deserve it. _You _come first; you always come first, ya got that? I can't lose ya, Beth. I _won't_." I sniffed, 'cause snot was startin' to run out of my nose like it always did when I got too worked up 'bout somethin'.

"I love ya too much to let ya come to any harm. So just lemme fuckin' protect ya, for Christ's sakes, will ya?!"

Her mouth fell open, and I wiped my nose. She tumbled slowly back onto her ass, her eyes never leaving mine. I nodded.

"I know, I know. Ya don't hafta rub it in." I reached out to pull her back up. "I'm shocked, too." I smiled ruefully.

Beth's grin was beautiful, and she flung her arms 'round my neck. We started kissin' furiously, for several moments. It felt great to have her in my arms again.

When I gently pushed her away, she still couldn't stop smilin'. I chuckled.

"Make your day?"

She nodded, laughing. "You sure as hell did. I love you, Daryl." She kissed me again, runnin' her fingers through my hair and cuppin' the back of my neck.

"I love you, Beth," I murmured 'tween kisses. Seein' her happy made me happy. Again, I regretted that I couldn't make love to her, show her how I felt, instead of just tellin' her.

Standing up, she held out her hand. "Come on, we can't stay here. We should keep going. I saw smoke back there, and I'm sure anyone with two good ears heard my screams. Let's not be here when they come to investigate."

I blinked. _Well, then. Had I thought she was smart? _Now I knew why. She was learnin'. I smiled. There was so much I could teach her, and she'd never forget it; she was smart as a whip, my Beth.

We started followin' the tracks again, side by side. I sought out her hand this time, and held it tight. She smiled at me, and I smiled back.

* * *

><p>A while later, we found small cave, and decided to set up there for the night. Only one of us could fit in it at a time, and, since I hadn't slept last night, Beth volunteered to take the first watch.<p>

I crawled into the hole, feelin' a touch claustrophobic, but it passed. I was so damn tired.

Beth leaned inside, coverin' my body with hers. She smiled down at me.

"Goodnight, Daryl." We kissed, and I copped a feel of her ass. She giggled.

"'Night, Beth. Love ya."

She grabbed up my hand and kissed ever' single finger, on the print. When she got to my pinky, she pulled it between her lips and sucked it a moment, then gave me back my hand. By this point, my soldier was at full salute. _Dirty minx_. _Make me fall asleep with a sad soldier..._

"Love you more." She moved to back out, then stopped. She turned back to me.

"Daryl?"

I propped my head up in my hands. "Yeah?"

She looked at the ground. "What about... Well, what about Carol? Weren't you two, you know... Close?"

I blinked. _Ah, fuck_. I'd forgotten all 'bout Carol.

I'd also forgotten that I was still pissed at Rick for kickin' her out without discussin' it with me, and the rest of the council, first. What she'd done might not've been right, but I knew she'd have a legitimate reason for doin' it. She always did. Carol was no stranger to hard shit, not anymore. She wasn't the timid little mouse she used to be. I liked to think I'd had a hand in helpin' her find her true self, the self that didn't take any shit, not from anyone. But perhaps, this time, killin' those two people, just to stop the spread of a sickness that had taken over anyway, she'd gone too far. I didn't know; I hadn't gotten a chance to talk to her 'bout it, not 'fore the attack. It seemed like so long ago, and I realised it had been more than a month. It was staggerin' to realise how much time had passed.

"Daryl?"

I flinched when she touched me, unintentionally. Somethin' in her face flickered; it happened so fast I wasn't sure what I'd seen, but I'd bet it was anxiety. At any rate, she hid it well.

"Yeah, yeah, we were close. Not this close," I motioned to her and me, "but we were definately close. Rick... he, uh, kicked Carol out."

Beth frowned. "What, why? When?"

I rolled my head back to stare at the ceiling of the cave. "She killed Karen and David." I looked back at her again. "Do ya think what he did was right?"

She shrugged. "Did she admit to it?"

I nodded.

She chewed her lip. "I don't know, Daryl. I don't. I mean, I'm sure she had her reasons-"

"That's what I told 'im."

"-But that's so unlike her to do something like that. That's... cold, you know?"

I _did _know. It was somethin' I'd never thought Carol would degenerate to, not in a million years. I knew she would kill to defend, protect, and out of necessity. But in cold blood? That was so outta character for her. Rick'd told me she'd told him she'd done it to stop the sickness from spreadin', so no one else would die, that she'd killed 'em 'cause _someone _had to do somethin', even if she'd done it mercifully - and that she wasn't proud of what she'd done. So, she was remorseful... but she'd still done it. The Carol I knew wasn't like that. But I knew Rick wouldn't lie to me about somethin' that serious, neither.

The whole thin' felt wrong to me, but I didn't wanna doubt Rick's decision. He was the leader for a reason, and it wasn't my place to judge him; he'd had a lot of hard choices to make for the good of the group, and not all of 'em had been perfect, but his sense of right and wrong was rarely, if ever, askew. I didn't _like _his choice; I didn't wanna question it, either, but... That was why he was the leader. It was his call. He knew Carol just as well as I did; he knew that she normally wouldn't've dreamed of killin' someone who was sick, even if it meant preventin' the spread of the deadly illness. _Somethin' _must've happened to make her think she should step up and take action.

I didn't envy Rick his position. I knew I could lead, too, if I wanted to. But I didn't want the responsibility. I had enough just lookin' out for one woman. A whole group... _No thank you_.

I found myself questioning his haste this time, though. I really felt he'd acted too impetuously. Had she told him why she'd done it? I'd asked him that, and he didn't have a ready answer, so I had to assume she hadn't had one, neither. Carol was a lot harder now than she'd once been; Sophia's death'd done that. But I never thought she'd murder people, not livin' people. And a lot of 'em had died, anyway. She hadn't prevented anythin'.

Or... there was somethin' he wasn't tellin' me - but I doubted that. After I found him and hugged his skinny ass, I'd sure as hell tell him what I thought of it all. Ya can bet your ass on that.

"Yeah. I know. I think he's wrong, though. I think she least deserved a chance to explain 'erself to the council, ya know? He shoulda told us, and let us decide, before he just went ahead and dumped her." My brow came down, my tone angrier as I went on.

Beth touched my knee. "Do you... Love her, too?"

_Did I?_

I shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I do. Carol and I have been through a lot together." I looked back at Beth significantly. "But so have we."

She nodded, her eyes shiny. "Will you look for her when we find the others?"

I chewed my lip. "I dunno. I think I should, ya know? I owe it to her to make the effort."

She looked at her hands in the growing darkness. "Okay. I guess I would too, if I were you." She turned her back to me and and shuffled out of the hole.

"'Night, Daryl." Her tone was sad. I wanted to kick myself, but I couldn't lie to her, and she'd asked.

I laid back on the hard dirt and wondered just what the hell I would do. I loved Beth; we were together, now. But I loved Carol, too. Not like I loved Beth, exactly, but if I had to choose 'tween the two... It'd be a damn hard choice, for sure. I didn't relish the thought of makin' it.

And, obviously, Beth was upset about that. Right now, though, there was nothin' I could do 'bout it 'cept remember that Carol wasn't on the grid, and that she may never be, again. But I had to know. Whether or not Beth would wait for me, was another question entirely. I wanted her to; I also knew that was just plain selfish. I should tell her that until further notice, anyway, we were an item, and that I'd decide what to do 'bout Carol when the time came.

"Beth?"

She sniffed. "Yeah?"

I sat up and cupped the back of her neck. "Don't think 'bout it, alright? I love ya. I'll worry 'bout Carol when I hafta. I'll deal with it, alright?"

She nodded, but didn't turn around. "Okay. I understand, Daryl. I do." She wiped her nose. "I won't force you to choose. I love you too much to do that to you. Whatever you decide... I'll abide by your decision."

_Jesus Christ_. _Was there ever a sweeter fuckin' woman born 'fore this one? _I felt like she'd stabbed me in the gut with kindness. The guilt was horrible.

"Go to sleep now, Daryl. I'll keep watch."

I didn't move for a long moment, struck dumb, and guilty as hell. When I did lay back again, I flopped my wrist over my face. _How could any woman be as selfless as Beth?_ _How? _The question kept reverberatin' inside my head until I finally fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

><p>"<em>So now you're sleeping peaceful... I lie awake and pray... that you'll be strong tomorrow... and we'll see another day... and we will praise it... and love the light that brings a smile across your face... oh God if you're out there won't you hear me... I know that we've never talked before... oh God the man I love is leaving... won't you take him when he comes to your door... am I in heaven here or am I in hell... at the crossroads I am standing... now you're sleeping peaceful... I lie awake and pray... that you'll be strong tomorrow... and we'll see another day... and we will praise it... and love the light that brings a smile across your face... hold on... hold on to yourself... for this is gonna hurt like hell<em>."

I could barely hear her, but Beth's voice, singin' low, woke me. It was pitch black in here, but, liftin' my head, I could just see a shaft of spare moonlight touch her golden head.

What words I did catch made my chest hurt. Her tone was sad, enough that even I could feel it. Not that I wasn't feelin' guilty already, but this was kinda like the cherry on top of a big strawberry-guilt-sundae. With a sad chocolate drizzle. And sprinkles of despair.

Apparently I had ice cream on the brain. Fat chance I'd ever get any ever again... Maybe that was why I was thinkin' 'bout it. Didn't know what I had til it was gone.

But with Beth, I knew what I had. I just wasn't convinced I deserved it. She deserved the best; that fact didn't even bear scrutiny. I was _not _the best man for her, I knew that much. I was old, for one thin'. A lot of people, if not ever'one, would think I was crazy, fallin' for someone who was so much younger. For another, we were complete polar opposites. She was young, I wasn't. She was pure, I was tainted. She was selfless, and I was self_ish_. We were just so different, I couldn't imagine ever fallin' for her outside of the current circumstances of the world. A few years ago, she and I would've never even met 'cause our kinds of people just didn't mix. Willingly, or otherwise. Until it all went to shit, that is. The world was a lot smaller now.

When she finished, she was quiet. I wanted to pull her in here with me and tell her ever'thin' would be alright, make love to her, but I couldn't do that, not out here. Someone had to keep watch. I decided to give her a break and take over, 'cause there was no way in hell I was gettin' any more sleep tonight, not with my thoughts buzzin' like a pissed-on beehive.

"Beth?"

She jumped a little. "Yeah, Daryl?"

"Go to sleep. I'll take ove-"

A scream rent the air, and even I jumped when I heard it, the sound dying slowly as it echoed down the dark tunnel carved by the tracks. A silence fell that was almost deafening.

I felt Beth's hand on my leg, bunchin' fabric in her fingers painfully as her nails caught some of my skin. I could _feel _her fear.

"What the _fuck _was that?!" She hissed.

I wasn't sure, but I suspected the sound had been made by an animal not native to Georgia. I'd only heard it once before, and that was at a zoo. Or more accurately, _near _a zoo. I'd never actually been in one.

"Daryl?" Her voice was tinged with terror, and she started to try to squeeze into the hole with me. I let her. We were a tight fit, but we managed. I slid my arms 'round her and squeezed her back as the scream came again, closer this time. Beth started to shake.

"What _is _it?" She whispered. Her eyelashes fluttered against my neck and made me itch. Her lips brushed my Adam's apple when she spoke. Despite the direness of the situation, I felt my cock harden again.

"It's a mountain lion."

"What?! A _mountain lion_?!"

I covered her mouth with mine in a quick kiss. "Shh, Beth. Get your knife out, and stay here." I tried to leave the hole.

Beth snatched the collar of my jacket and held on like a bulldog, hissin' hysterically, "Where are you going?! Please don't leave me!"

I turned back to face her, even though I couldn't've seen her face if I'd been lookin' for it. "I'm goin' out to get my bow, alright? I'm comin' back."

She released me. I leaned out, felt 'round, snatched up my weapon, and quietly jammed my ass back in next to her. She shifted to make room she didn't have for the crossbow.

"What are you going to do?"

I looked in the direction of her voice. "I'm gonna sit here and watch. If'n it comes 'round here, I'll shoot it."

Her tone was slightly skeptical when she replied, "You really think one bolt will stop a mountain lion?"

I shrugged. "A bolt will stop anythin', if'n ya hit it in the right spot."

She inhaled. "It's pitch black. How can you tell?"

I frowned. "Didn't we find a Maglite at the house?" Beth nodded; I felt it.

"Did you bring it with you?"

"Thought I did." I reached for my bag. The big cat screamed again, even closer. The sound was eerily reminiscent of a woman's scream of terror.

Beth shivered.

Diggin' inside my pack as quietly as I could, I finally found the flashlight, and handed it to her. I left my pack in the entrance. It was big enough to block most of it. I sat back, and settled my crossbow on my bent knees, aimin' it at the tiny hole left by my bulging bag. I took the flashlight and held it in my left hand, under the barrel. I rested my thumb on the button. If that dumb-ass cat poked his nose in here, he'd be blinded twice. He'd stay the hell away if he knew what was good for him.

Beth was tucked snugly into my right side, and the hole quickly became stifling with our combined heat. We were silent as we waited for the next scream.

When it came, it sounded like it was right above us. I closed my eyes briefly and prayed it wouldn't scent us and go the fuck away.

I shifted, ready, my finger strokin' the trigger. Beth had wrapped her arms 'round my chest and buried her face in my armpit, a dangerous hidin' place if'n ya ask me; she'd probably suffocate under there from an overdose of b.o.

I felt a thump outside our cave. Beth didn't move, not even to breathe. I tensed, waitin'.

Yellow eyes winked back at me through the tiny opening, and I knew it could see us. All I could see were its eyes, and just as I pushed the button on the flashlight to blind it, so many thin's happened at once that for a few minutes I didn't know what the hell'd gone down.

My pack shifted suddenly in the dark, and the huge cat snarled, loudly. I pushed both the flashlight button and trigger at once, the sound of the cable snappin' the bolt outta the barrel and the click of the button drownin' out the snarls and the shiftin' of the pack. It was confusing as all hell. I felt a brief wind on my pantlegs, felt somethin' catch 'em up and rip through 'em like a hot knife through butter, and then it was screamin' so loudly I winced, and felt Beth release me to cover her ears. I would have covered my own but I was too busy tryin' to switch from bow to knife that I didn't get a chance. My ears started to ring.

In the following minutes, the snarls died, I dropped the flashlight - which rolled around crazily as I scrambled for my knife - and an utter silence descended. Breathing hard, strainin' to see and hear, the light lost beneath my thighs, pointin' the wrong way, I hissed, "What happened?"

Beth reached up to slap her hand over my mouth, and thrust her other hand between my legs to seize the light and flick it off. In the darkness, I waited, the ringin' slowly fading.

We didn't move for several minutes. Finally I could hear the silence Beth was hearing, but under it, somethin' was rustlin', close by. Her hand remained firmly clamped over the lower half of my face.

We could hear a walker out there somewhere, shufflin' and growlin'. As we waited, my eyes finally adjusted to the dark, and I watched, my heart rate increasing again, as the walker stumbled up our hill, fought its way through the tangle of trees and bushes, and fell onto the lion I'd killed, tearin' into the carcass with a wet ripping sound, directly outside our hidin' spot.

We waited forever for the walker to finish its meal. Getting up clumsily, it staggered off downhill, and we waited another twenty minutes after that before either of us dared move outta the cramped hole.

While we waited for the walker to reach the tracks, Beth, her arms 'round me again, grippin' me like she was drowning instead of hiding, whispered, "You did it, Daryl! You really fucking did it! You're amazing!"

I shrugged, and it shifted us both. "Shh, I just got lucky. All there's to it."

She shook her head. "No way. _No one's _that lucky, not even you." She reached out to feel my shins, and I felt her fingers slide inside the tears in my pants to touch my skin. So it had clawed me. Cats' claws often caused septic infections, if'n they scratched ya. I _was _damn lucky.

She pulled her hand back and rubbed her fingers together. They were dry. "No blood. I take it back. You _are _one lucky son of a bitch, I'll tell you that, Dixon. Is that horseshoe up your ass sore?"

I snorted, despite myself. "Matter of fact, it's fine. Somethin' else is sore, though." I squeezed her in the dark. I could hear her smile.

"I bet." Her hand brushed my crotch, and I groaned, quietly.

"What? Did I really hurt you?"

I shook my head. "Naw. It's what ya _ain't_ doin' what hurts me more, darlin'."

I felt her tilt her head, curious, and I reached out for her hand to settle it on the bulge 'tween my thighs.

"_Oh_. I see." Gently, slowly, she began to massage me. After a few minutes of this erotic torture, I grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"That's it. We're findin' a house to hole up in _today_, come hell or high fuckin' water."

She laughed quietly. "Yes, sir. Whatever you say, sir."

"Damn straight." I crawled out. "Stay in there and get some sleep. You're gonna need it." I reached out to flick her chin, but got her cheek; then I left her to inspect the damage the walker'd done to the lion. Usin' my flashlight briefly, I looked the carcass over. It was a damn mess. I flicked off the light and sat outside of the cave, and after a while, as the sky started to grow lighter, I heard Beth's soft snores. Leanin' my head back, I watched the sun rise like a hot ball of molten gold over the tops of the dyin' trees. I was lookin' forward to later.

* * *

><p>While the sun climbed over the treetops and the chill wore off, I checked out the lion carcass again now that the light was better. The walker'd dug into its gut, and blood and bits of leftover intestine had trickled out, dryin' in rivulets in the dirt. Flies buzzed 'round it copiously.<p>

I bent to examine its head. The tongue hung out, slack. My bolt had entered through its left eye, the right eye still glassy and bright yellow, despite the dry heat buildin' up. Its teeth were large and yellowish, as a predator's teeth tend to be. Usin' a stick, I pried up its lip.

_Hmm. Might as well take a trophy, since it's already dead._

When Beth crawled out of the hole a half hour later, I stashed my trophy in my pocket 'fore she could see what I was doin' and removed the bolt from the lion's eye, wiping it in what little grass was near me.

"Mornin', sunshine." I smiled at her. She didn't see me wipe blood off my hands with one of my new rags (a square of bedsheet) and I hastily stuffed it back in my ass pocket.

She grunted. I bit back a laugh.

"Damn, that hole is cramped. I feel like I slept in a friggin' box all night." She bent over to wash her face in a bucket of water I'd gathered at a small stream nearby, a tributary of the Yellowjacket that flowed toward the gorge from the hill behind us. I _was _going to wash my hands in that water, but didn't comment. My rag had still been damp enough to get most of the blood off.

"I take it ya didn't sleep well."

She glared at me. "No shit, Sherlock. What gave it away?" Her tone was acidic. I still wanted to laugh at her. She was cute when she was crusty.

I threw her a bottle of water and she took several swallows before approachin' me, her brows drawn grumpily and her mouth set in a line. I felt a shit-storm comin', but what I'd done to deserve it, I hadn't a clue, so I braced myself for impact.

She capped it, handed it back, then brushed my bangs off my face. Her frown melted away into a look of concern. "How's your leg?"

I raised a brow. _Mind. Blown._

I cleared my throat when I recovered from my shock. "Ahem, s'fine." I'd scrubbed it at the creek, after I'd taken a leak. I'd washed the two strips of fabric in the clear water and applied another layer of sap before reapplyin' the cloth bandages.

She smiled. "Good. Maybe later I'll have a look." Her eyes rolled up to meet mine, and my gut dropped. My cock swelled.

"Yeah, sounds... g-grool," I stuttered, feelin' like a complete idiot. _Grool?!_

Beth laughed. Reaching up on her toes to peck my hairy chin, she replied, "Grool. Shall we get a move on?"

I nodded. "Mm-hmm." I didn't trust myself to speak again yet after that monumental fuck-up.

We packed up our shit and hit the tracks, hopin' to find a residential area 'fore noon.

* * *

><p>Three hours of walkin' and two close-encounters with walkers later, we finally reached a road. The tracks cut through it, then curved through the forest. We stopped followin' the tracks and stood on the road while I decided which way to go, checking the position of the sun to keep my bearin's. We were still more or less heading east, so I pointed down the road, the eastbound way.<p>

"Let's go that way."

Beth nodded. "Alright." She watched me as we started walkin' again, and I knew she was observing my gait. I'd started to limp a little, but now it was more pronounced. I wouldn't say so, but I would kill for a rest.

She didn't say anythin' until a downed log by the roadside came into view. We'd seen no houses or laneways yet, so when she spotted it she nudged me with her shoulder. I looked where she pointed, inwardly breathin' a sigh of relief.

"There's a log, big guy. Want to have a seat?"

I nodded, and she led me to it, helpin' ease me down when I winced from the pain. Brushing my hands away, she unbuckled my belt and pulled my pants out from under me as I leaned back on the log, makin' a face when she exposed my blood-soaked band-aid.

Sittin' back on her haunches, Beth was quiet. After a moment, she said, "Will you trust me to run up the road a ways by myself, see if there's any houses up there? You shouldn't be on that leg much longer."

I closed my eyes and let out a big breath. I wanted to tell her no 'fore she'd even finished the question, but I didn't think I'd even another half-mile left in me. I'd have to trust her to come back. This one time, I had to let her go without me into danger. It didn't sit well with me. So my response was a tad curt.

"Yeah, fine. I'm givin' ya ten minutes. Be back here by then, or I'm gonna ring your pretty little neck for makin' me worry, ya hear? Now get the hell goin'." I eyed her in what I hoped was a threatening manner.

She grinned and saluted, popping to her feet. "Yes, sir!" Before she walked away, she leaned in to kiss me, cuppin' my cheek. I reached around and squeezed her ass, then slapped it lightly. "Get goin'. Don't dawdle, neither. Ya see what ya gotta see and come right back, got that?"

She nodded, and took off at a jog.

"Get your knife out!" I called, low, and I saw her pull it before she disappeared 'hind a bend in the road.

I took a good, long look around me before I leaned back and stared up at the sky for a minute. My thigh was throbbin'. I pulled up my pants again, remembering they were hangin' on my knees, and buckled up. I began to massage the wound gently, waitin' for her to return. I looked at my shadow on the ground. There was a pine cone about two inches from my head; when my shadow touched it, I figured at least ten minutes would have passed.

By the time the pine cone was completely in my shadow, she still wasn't back. Anxiety filled my gut and I heaved myself to my feet, threw on my pack and hefted my bow. As fast as my wound would allow, I walked in the direction she'd gone.

I'd just rounded the bend in the road when she popped out at me from behind a hedge, runnin' into me so hard that her hip collided with my thigh, sending a bolt of white-hot pain shootin' up my leg and into my stomach. I grunted and dropped my pack, hangin' onto my bow through sheer will alone.

"Oh my God, Daryl! I'm so sorry!" She leaned with me, bearing my weight as I tried to topple over on my side. She held me back, balancing me again on my good leg. Her hand applied pressure to my thigh as I drew in several breaths through my clenched teeth, waitin' for the worst of the pain to pass.

"I'm sorry," she kept saying, "I didn't see you there! Daryl?"

I nodded, wavin' my hand, my eyes squeezed shut as I braced my hands on my knees. "Gimme a minute."

Beth waited. I watched her from the corner of my eye, chewin' her lip anxiously, like she had somethin' she wanted to say but could barely keep herself from blurtin' out.

I stood, taking a tentative step. My leg buckled a bit, but I stayed up. Her hands fluttered helplessly; I patted her shoulder. "I got it."

"Good. I really am sorry. I am. I was just coming to show you what I found, and, well... You know what happened. But, come see!" She grabbed my hand, and pulled gently.

I slowly followed her around the hedge into a cul-de-sac. There were three houses here, and they were big. The place was deathly quiet and totally deserted. Nothin' moved, not even the leaves curled up in wind-strewn piles on the ground.

She led me up the front walk of a white house. The paint on the siding was cracked and peelin', and the eavestrough on the front porch had half fallen away, danglin' like a big white arm into the yard. A vine creeped up it toward the roof.

When she got to the steps, instead of goin' up, Beth veered left, to go 'round the back of the house. At the corner of the yard, she stopped to wait for me. When I caught up she snuck her shoulder under my armpit and huffed, "I think we need to stay more than a day. That gash is giving you more trouble than it ought to, and it won't heal if you keep tearing it open."

I didn't reply, just concentrated on watchin' our surroundings for walkers and keepin' an eye on where I stepped. The last thin' I needed was to fall again and _really _fuck up my leg.

Rounding the back corner in the backyard, I saw a bunker buried here, surrounded by old children's toys, grown over with vines. A swingset and a slide were almost completely overtaken by nature. A massive spider sat in its' web, spun 'tween two of the rusty swing chains.

I accidentally kicked a dirty soccer ball, bouncin' it off the side of the bunker with a hollow thump. I stopped, and Beth looked up at me from my armpit.

"How far did ya look 'round?"

"I went around all three houses. I haven't been in any yet." She pointed at the bunker. "I've been in there, though. You'll like what's inside. Come on."

Pulling me along, she carefully unscrewed the hatch, and helped me to go in feet-first, following right after, closin' and latchin' the hatch shut from the inside with the same large quick-link she'd pulled off the outside. Spinning the little gate closed over the threads, she dropped down next to me.

"This way."

I limped after her down a hallway, a dark hallway. "Ya came down here in the dark?" I asked, impressed. The only light came from a dirty window in the hatch.

"Yeah. I banged on the outside first, to see if anyone was home. I don't think anyone got a chance to use this bunker."

She turned into a doorway, and I almost missed it, but she reached out to pull me the right way. I could feel a room 'round me in the dark, and hear her shufflin'. Finally, a lantern lit up the space.

We were in a living room. Well, it looked like a living room. There was a fuse panel on the wall next to the door we'd just come through.

"Holy shit." I opened it. A red light was set next to a big black switch. I flipped it.

Somewhere, I heard a genny turn over and catch, thrummin' as it warmed up, and the lights overhead flickered on. Beth grinned at me, and I smiled back.

"Come on," she grabbed my hand, "Let's explore. Maybe we can find something better than sap to clean that cut."

I followed her back to the hallway, but when I turned the corner my knee gave out, and I slid down the wall to the floor. Beth came back, but I held up my hand.

"I'm fine. I'll just... Wait here." My eyes were heavy.

She knelt next to me, fingering the soppin' red spot on my pants. "No. There's a couch in there." She meant the living room. "I'll get you there then go looking myself."

Beth got me to the couch with my help, and I laid down flat-out for the first time in a long while. It felt good.

I heard a rippin' sound and felt a draft, and I sat up fast. "What're ya doin'?"

Knife in hand, Beth looked up at me, my pantleg torn open six inches to expose my wound. "What? I'm looking at your cut."

"Well, ya didn't hafta wreck my goddamn pants!"

She made a face at me. "You really think you won't find a new pair down here? Besides, our clothes are awful. They should be burned. We smell like ass."

I snapped, "I like these pants! They're comfortable!"

She snapped back, "They're disgusting! You can't expect to heal when you cover your wounds in gross fabric, Daryl. I _know _you know that. I'll find you some new, clean pants, and if I can't, I promise I'll wash and mend this pair, _alright_?" Her chest heaved. My jaw clenched. The tension was terrible.

Our eyes met, burnin', and she suddenly jumped into my lap, her hands all over my chest, tearin' at my shirt, while I tried to peel hers over her head, kissin' each other furiously all the while. Our gasping was loud and breathy, and my blood pounded in my ears. My leg was seepin' it, staining the couch beneath me, and in the throes of passionate kissin', I thought crazily that for once _I _was the one who could use a tamp. _Ha ha_.

Beth leaned back, pushin' her hair off her forehead. She sighed.

"What?"

She shook her head. "You're bleeding everywhere. We can't do this now." She picked her shirt up and climbed off of me. I frowned but didn't protest. My leg started throbbin' again.

"Sit tight. I'll be back, and when we've taken care of this," she pressed my hand to her inside-out shirt over my cut, "Then we'll finish what we started." She winked, and took off.

I laid back, frustrated. Suddenly my eyes got so heavy, I was asleep before I even realised I was exhausted.

* * *

><p>"<em>Ow<em>, dammit!"

I sat up with a jolt as Beth woke me from a sound sleep by pourin' rubbing alcohol on my coagulating gash. I gripped the cushion beneath me and rode out the sting as the alcohol burned away all the crap that was festerin' in there. It felt like acid.

"Shh, shh," Beth said, squeezing my knuckles and patting dry the liquid that had run under my thigh. I hissed, "Jesus, ya coulda warned me! _Fuuuuuck_!"

She made a guilty face. "I'm sorry," she said low, tryin' to hold me still and failing because I was so much bigger. "I let you sleep longer than I should've."

I looked at the wound, the bubbling of the alcohol startin' to dissipate. What was left was raw, ripped flesh. It wasn't deep, but it was long. There were several small, jagged slivers of rotten railroad tie mashed into it. I knew what that meant. Extraction.

I fell back, still gasping. Beth leaned in to look for herself. "Ugh, I knew there'd be something still stuck in there. You just _had _to go first, didn't you?"

I raised my head to glare at her, but she was smilin'. I tried hard to keep my glare but failed, epically, and my lips turned up at the corners despite my best efforts to keep 'em down.

"God. What's that smell?" Beth wrinkled her nose, and pulled her face back from my leg.

Painfully I sat up. "What smell's that?"

She pointed to the cut, blood slowly oozin' up outta it, yellow pus bubbling in the alcohol. The edges were ragged and purple. Like dead meat. I was gettin' mighty tired of seeing the damage, personally, but I winced and leaned forward more, sniffing the air.

There _was _a peculiar smell... "Ya mean 'sides the rotten, polluted, gag-me stench?"

She raised a brow but replied, "Yeah."

I sat back. "It's creosote."

She frowned. "Isn't that like, lamp oil? Like, eighteen-nineties, before-electricity-was-invented, lamp oil?"

"Wicks and chimneys, shit like that? Kinda, but you're thinkin' of kerosene. Creosote's diff'rent." I scratched my neck.

"Well, why the fuck does your cut smell like cre-cro-whatever?"

I raised a brow and gave her an _I-know-because-I'm-smarter-than-you _look. "It smells like that 'cause rail ties are treated in creosote 'fore they're laid, to keep the wood from rottin' too fast." Under my breath I added, "Not that that helped any, what with the constant exposure to water right there..."

Beth looked at me like I was full of shit. "Why the hell would they use that?!"

I shrugged. "'Cause it's oily. Oil repels water. Duh." I stuck my tongue out at her, then jumped when she slapped my knee, wincing.

"No one likes a smartass, Dixon."

I barked a laugh. "Ha! That ain't your tune when it's _you _bein' the smartass, honey."

She glared. "Keep it up."

"Ya asked, I answered. Don't like it? Don't ask dumb fuckin' questions." I laid back down, inwardly cringing at the harshness of my tone. I hadn't meant to be so sarcastic, but I was sore, and takin' my pain out on her felt good.

_I'm such a fucking asshole._

"I beg your pardon?" Her tone was indignant. "I just wanted to know. Damn it, Daryl. I thought-"

Feeling guilty for bein' so mean to her, but fed up, I spat before I could stop myself, "Well don't fuckin' do that, ya ain't no good at it!" I crossed my arms and glared at the ceiling. Sucking in a deep breath, I waited for the shit-storm I'd stirred up to hit.

Beth didn't say anythin', at first. When I finally looked over to see if she was still there, the look on her face was hurt. I swallowed as she asked, "Is that what you think of me?" Her tone was soft. Pained. Deadly.

I sighed, hopin' to avert the worst of her temper by tellin' her the truth. "Naw, I don't think that, Beth. I'm just real sore, and that alcohol bit like a bitch. It's throbbin', and I, well, I ain't dealin' well with the pain, alright?"

She raised a brow, but didn't berate me further.

I looked at my gut. I hadn't bitched this much when I'd fallen down that ravine and stabbed myself with one of my own bolts. 'Course, there'd been no one 'round to listen to my bitchin', 'cept my hallucination of my brother, and let's face it, he was of absolutely no comfort. That anal prick. I missed him, despite his gruff manner and curt, rude personality. He was an asshole, but he was my brother. There was no changin' him and I knew it would have been pointless to try, anyway. His annoyin' proddin' was what got me through that day.

Beth sighed, and stood up. She went to the end table and picked up a pan, bringing it back to the couch and settin' it on my gut.

Kneeling next to me again, she said, "I'm going to pick all those slivers out before they really turn this wound septic. Do try not to rip my head off again, please, or you can do this your-fucking-self."

I made an exasperated face. Yep, I'd shoved my foot down my throat this time. No sex for me. _Goddammit_.

"Look, I'm sorry, alright?" I lifted my head. She was sterilising a pair of wicked-lookin' tweezers and a curved needle for stitching. _Ugh_.

"Don't talk, it distracts me."

_Crap_. She was mad. Really mad. I sighed. She dug in. I screamed, and promptly passed out.

* * *

><p>When I woke up again, I didn't recognise my surroundin's, but when ya were constantly on the move, that was pretty normal. At least I was indoors.<p>

Slowly I remembered findin' the bunker, and all the not-so awesome events leadin' up to my little surgery. I looked to the right, saw floor, carpet, another couch, a chair. A lamp. Pedestrian, ever'day shit.

There was a weight on my bladder, and I realised that was what had awoken me. I lifted my head. I was naked. And clean. Beth's head was restin' on my stomach, her hand under her cheek, her eyes closed. She snored softly.

I smiled. She looked like an angel when she was asleep. I hoped that when she woke up she'd be in a better mood. There were tear-tracks through the dirt on her cheeks, so she'd been cryin'... Probably 'cause I was bein' such a dickhead to her. My gut twisted; my bladder also cried out for mercy.

Gently, I lifted her head and shoulders off of me and lowered her to the floor. She must've been really tired, 'cause she didn't stir at all. I got up, noting my cleanly bandaged thigh, which felt much better but still smarted with ever' step, and started lookin' for the toilet.

I found it just in time, leanin' on the wall behind it and lettin' out a sigh as I "drained the snake". I pissed for _forty-five seconds_. No joke. That was a damn long time for me. I wondered how long I'd been out. That was the thin' 'bout bein' underground; ya lost all sense of time. Ya didn't know whether it was day or night outside, and it fucked ya up.

Finishin', I shook off the last few drops and stretched. In the mirror over the sink, I saw my reflection. My hair was gettin' too long again. My goatee was growing back in nicely. I was cleaner than I'd been since the last time we'd left a house. She must've given me a sponge-bath. I was mighty sad that I'd missed that.

Sitting on the toilet seat, I peeled back the bandage to examine Beth's handiwork. She'd shaved me again, so it didn't rip all my thigh hairs out, and it peeled away easily. There were ten neat, tiny stitches holdin' the wound together; the skin was still bruised and swollen but there was no more yellow pus that I could see. A few droplets of fresh blood oozed from the stitch-holes, and they were greasy with ointment. I stood up and walked 'round a bit, testin' it. It smarted, but the pain was bearable. It hadn't penetrated my muscle, so for the most part it was pretty superficial. I could walk fine. I crouched slowly, wincing. That pulled on the stitches rather sharply, so I made a mental note not to do that for a while, then smoothed the bandage back on and left the bathroom.

Stomach rumblin', I wondered if there was any food down here. Instead of goin' back to the room where I'd left Beth, I wandered into the other rooms, exploring. Aside from the bathroom and living room, there was a shower room, a kitchenette, a laundry room, and a bedroom. The last room I found was storage. And what a store it was.

There must have been ever'thin' under the sun in here that anyone in an apocalypse could ever need. The first thin' I picked up was a roll of toilet paper, tossin' it in the air and thinkin' 'bout how awesome seein' it again was as I continued to browse. We'd run out last week, and I was really starting to loath wipin' my ass with maple leaves. They were a damn sight better than poison oak and an itchy fuckin' asshole, but they weren't no Royale, neither.

I passed all sorts of dry foods, canned goods, supplies. Whoever'd built this place sure knew what they were doin' - probably extreme-couponers, or somethin'. Too bad they'd never gotten to use it. Oh well, their loss was our gain.

Takin' my picks back to the kitchen, I pulled out a pot and started boiling some water. I pulled an apron over my head when the water I boiled spit on my bare gut, tyin' it behind me. I'd have to remember to get dressed first, next time.

By the time my meal was almost ready, Beth wandered in, lookin' tired and worn. I smiled at her, and grabbed another plate. "Mornin'. Ya hungry?"

She nodded. "Morning. I'm starving." Pulling up a chair to the bar, she casually watched me finish cookin' spaghetti. Neither of us actually knew if it was mornin', but who cared?

Straining the noodles, I melted some margarine over them, poured on the hot tomato sauce, and set her plate in front of her. "Sorry there's no meat balls. I didn't have time to hunt us up some squirrels."

She made a disgusted face and I laughed. "I hope you're joking," she remarked tartly, diggin' in.

I dug into my own plate, across the counter. Her eyes kept strayin' to the bare skin of my chest over the top of my apron as she ate. I smirked, and her eyes darted away, her cheeks pink.

Changing the subject, she asked, "How did you sleep?"

Decidin' not to mention that I'd passed out, _not _fallen asleep, I replied smoothly, "Pretty good. You?"

She shrugged. "I've slept better." Her eyes had bags beneath them. I knew a way to help her sleep better, but I didn't know if she was up for that yet, or if she was still mad at me. I'd have to play it by ear.

"How does your leg feel?"

I wiped the corner of my mouth with the back of my hand, and licked off the sauce that'd come with it. She stared.

"Feels good. I can do pretty much ever'thin' 'cept crouch. That hurts like a bitch."

"I bet it does. I pulled eight slivers out of there. You're lucky we cleaned that up before your blood poisoned."

I nodded. "I know I am." I looked up at her from under my brow, elbows on the countertop. I put down my fork.

"I'm sorry I been such an asshole, Beth. I know that ain't no excuse for what I said, but-"

Beth smiled. "Apology accepted."

I smiled back. Presently, she put down her fork.

"I'm sorry, too, Daryl. I'm sorry I let you wind me up like that, and I'm sorry I hurt you." Her eyes began to glimmer with tears. "When you passed out I started to bawl, and I was crying so hard I couldn't see what I was doing and had to stop-"

I walked 'round the bar and wrapped her in my arms. She came willingly, meltin' into me. She fit me perfectly, like she was made for me to hold. I kissed her crown.

"Shh, s'alright, darlin'. I ain't the easiest patient to deal with, I know. Let's just forget it, and move on, huh?"

She sniffed and hugged my waist. "I love you, Daryl."

I grinned into her hair. "So I keep hearin'. I love ya too, darlin'." She lifted her head and started kissin' me, and I felt her fingers untying my apron strings and I laughed, sayin' 'tween kisses, "Ya just been itchin'... to get this damn thin' off me... ain't ya?"

She nodded, smiling into our kiss. "Mmmhmm. If we're being honest, I've wanted this since before that lion attacked us. I've been dying, not feeling your hands on me, Daryl."

Her words fired my blood, and I pulled her off her chair and lifted her onto the countertop, my thigh only pinchin' a little with the effort. If'n I was careful, a good old-fashioned fucking shouldn't aggravate it at all. _Booyah_!

Her legs pinned my hips, and I lifted her under her ass, carryin' her to the bedroom I'd passed earlier. She clung to me, tryin' to keep her weight away from my stitches. Her lips covered my face and neck, and by the time we hit the bed together, her teeth were grazin' my collarbone. My skin shivered with anticipation.

Beth had never put her shirt back on after she'd used it to staunch the flow of my blood, but she had on her tank top and bra, which I rid her of quickly. I stroked her smooth skin, the scent of her sweat intoxicating. A lot of people worried 'bout body odor: I'll admit to bein' one of 'em on occasion. But in the heat of the moment, her sweat smelled like sex to me, and I couldn't get enough of her. It made me want to fuck her all the more. The urge to be deep inside her was almost unbearable. My cock was sore with the strain of my desire.

Beth's hands were ever'where, but so was my mouth. I unzipped her jeans and yanked 'em off, kissin' my way down her body til I'd reached the apex of her thighs. I sought out her clit and teased her mercilessly with my tongue. She threw her head back, mewling, squirmin'. I gripped one of her asscheeks in one hand and palmed her breast in the other. She winced slighty, but her cries were drivin' me wild.

She buried her fingers in my hair, scratching my scalp gently, yankin' hard occasionally when I really concentrated on her sweet spot. She pulled me up when she could take no more, and flipped us, straddlin' my hips. Her hands massaged my chest, nails diggin' in and leaving pink grooves on my untanned skin. She ground her crotch into mine as she leaned over and licked my nipples, first one then the other, swirlin' her tongue 'round them, then bitin' 'em softly.

My hands kneaded her asscheeks, working their way down her thighs toward her knees. She leaned back, takin' my cock in her hand behind her and strokin' me hard. I brought my hands up to squeeze her breasts playfully, and she smiled at me, gasping. _There was somethin' diff'rent, here_... I thought her breasts looked a little bigger, but, caught up in the moment, I overlooked it.

Reachin' beneath my cock to cup my balls and roll them in her palm, I groaned, flexing my muscles, shiftin' her on top of me. Damn woman would drive me bat-shit crazy if'n she didn't let me penetrate her soon.

"Beth, I gotta-"

"In a minute." Her voice was hard, but not angry. Just... in charge. I watched her like a hawk as she backed over me, careful not to touch my bandage as she went. Lowering her head, she let her hair slide over my stomach, hips, and cock. It tickled and my skin twitched furiously. She stopped, then kissed the head of my dick, flicked it with her tongue, then took it all into her mouth in one movement. I felt the back of her throat, hot and slick, and then she was pullin' back, but her lips hugged my shaft so tightly as she did that I dropped my head back in ecstasy. She went to take another pull but I didn't have it in me to withstand another stroke like that, and I growled through clenched teeth, "Beth... now, goddammit."

She smiled. "As you wish." I'd flipped her on her back and was hoverin' over her before she'd reached the end of her sentence, leanin' down to suck on her neck hard as I slid inside her, finally, her warm folds expanding reluctantly to accept my thick length. I was so hot for this woman I thought I'd fuckin' explode.

For a minute I just enjoyed watching her face as I made my first thrust. Her eyes locked with mine, and she grinned. I grinned back, then shifted my weight to my good leg before I started to pump her. With my thumb, I reached 'tween us and endeavoured to finish what I'd started earlier.

I wasn't goin' for more'n five minutes when I felt her tense up beneath me, her breath comin' faster and her eyes sliding shut, she was so close. I eased back on her clit but increased my pace inside her. Within seconds we were on the edge together, and I practically roared as I came, pistoning her hard and layin' the pressure on her clit again fiercely. She screamed as she came, in my ear. This time I didn't mind.

I fell on her, unmindful for a moment of crushin' her, but she didn't say anythin', just rolled me to the side a bit and started kissin' the sweat from my forehead. Strokin' my damp hair back, she murmured, "That was great, Daryl."

I nodded. "Was, wasn't it." I panted on her chest, wrapping my arm around her ribs and keepin' her slick body snug to mine. I'd never really been the kind of man who habitually indulged in after-sex cuddlin', but with Beth... It felt right. That, and I never wanted to leave her side. I _really _liked it here.

I lifted my chin and rested it on her collarbone. "I ain't never come that fast in my whole fuckin' life. You're fuckin' intense, darlin'. Woohoo."

Beth laughed. "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. You were pretty intense, too." She stroked my sweaty arm, feather-light. "I ever tell you, you have the sexiest arms, Dixon?"

I played with the smooth skin of her bellybutton, drawin' circles 'round the little dip and watchin' it tremble. "Not that I recollect. Hey... Do me a favour?"

She shifted beneath me. "What's that?"

I licked her nipple and blew it dry. "Don't ever get outta my bed." I looked up at her face, my eyes heavy. "I love ya more'n m'life, Bethy. Promise ya won't never leave me, darlin'." My voice was slurring in exhaustion.

Her eyes got wet, but her smile never wavered. "I won't leave you, Daryl. I promise."

My eyes had dropped shut. She whispered, "Your baby and I will never leave you, you sweet, adorable man. God, I love you, Daryl." Her hands continued to stroke me.

Her words didn't sink in 'fore I started to snore.

* * *

><p>When I awoke, I felt like shit. Frowning, I tried to roll outta bed, but didn't have the strength. I croaked, "Be... Beth..."<p>

She was right there with a glass of water, her face a mask of worry. Somethin' was wrong, I could see it in her eyes as she pried open my mouth and dropped two pills inside, sayin', "Swallow these, Daryl. Come on, big guy. That's it."

I took the water and swallowed, feelin' colder'n ice. The world was blurry.

"Th'fuck's wrong w'me?" I croaked. My whole body was a fog of stiff pain.

Beth shook her head. "I think you've got an infection, because you're burning up, but I'm not sure." She chewed her lip anxiously and touched my forehead.

I could barely keep my eyes open, but I didn't wanna pass out again, in case it was the last time I saw her. I gripped her hand but there was no force behind it. I'd bet anythin' that behind those terrified blue eyes she was thinkin' _not again_.

My head lolled toward her. "M'sorry, Bethy."

She laugh-cried a little, squeezing my limp hand in both of hers. "It's not your fault. I didn't clean that wound in time..." She rested her cheek on my heart. "Please don't die, Daryl."

I snorted. "Die? Pffft. I don'fuckin' do shi'like that."

She sniffed, wiped her eyes. I felt her tears hit my bare skin, and they felt like burnin'-hot droplets of molten steel.

My eyes swimmin', I fought to stay conscious, but I was slowly losin' the fight. I mumbled, "Jus' in case I don' get t'tell ya 'gain, I... I love ya, Beth."

"Don't talk like that," she sobbed on my chest, shaking us both. My eyes rolled shut and I knew no more.

* * *

><p>Bright light. I winced.<p>

A voice from far away, but my ears were ringin' so loud I couldn't make anythin' out.

Then, blackness again.

* * *

><p>Tickin'.<p>

I frowned. _What was tickin'? _It was annoying. Scratchin', tickin'. It sounded extremely loud.

I tried to open my eyes and panicked a little when I couldn't do it at first. I vaguely remembered bein' blind not so long ago and the thought made me shudder. I tried again and this time, they cracked open, painfully, dry pus pullin' at my sore lashes. I turned my head, tryin' to locate the source of that fuckin' racket.

My vision was blurry, but it gradually came into focus. Beth was sitting near me in a chair, next to an end table from the living room. A candle burned on it, throwin' light onto the small journal she was writin' in. The incessant noise that was drivin' me up the wall was her pen scratching across the page.

My anger at the sound melted away. She was still here. _I_ was still here. _Thank you, God._

I tried to call her name but I had no voice, so I pulled my arm out from under the sheet and it hit the side of the mattress with a dull thump. I had no strength to lift it.

Her brows twitched at the sound, and her eyes flicked up. The smile that bloomed on her lips when she saw me starin' at her was more beautiful than a thousand sunrises. A smile like hers was worth givin' your last breath to see.

The journal and pen hit the floor as she dropped them in her haste to get to my side.

"Daryl!" Her lips descended onto mine, her arms resting on my chest and cuppin' the sides of my jaws. She kissed me fervently.

I tried to kiss her back but gave up when I was too weak to do even that, but she didn't let that stop her. Rubbin' my brow with her thumb, she pressed her cheek to mine. "God, Daryl... You _have _to stop hurting yourself. I can't take this for much longer, not knowing whether you'll wake up again... It's not good for the baby."

My eyes widened. _Baby?!_

"Oh, hell, I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you a better way... Shit." Her eyes sagged, as did her smile. She looked so sad, I frowned.

Openin' my mouth, I coughed for a minute, but finally found my voice.

"I'll always wake up, darlin'. Didn't I say so?" My voice was like sandpaper, and a bit curt. Her news was kind of a shock to me.

She nodded, her smile fadin' a little more. "You did."

I tried to sit up, and after a few tries, succeeded, swingin' my legs over the side of the mattress. "I never lie, Bethy. Not 'bout shit like that." I sounded 'bout as good as I felt, but it was the bathroom or bust at this point. I stood up, shaky. She was right there to bear my weight.

I limped with her to the toilet. I asked slowly, "Did ya... tell me ya were pregnant t'other night?"

Grunting under me a bit she huffed, "Yeah, I did, but you were already asleep. And that was a week ago."

I blinked a few times. "Thought I dreamed that." I got her to lift the seat for me, but when she turned to leave I leaned heavily on the wall and breathed, "Don't go."

She stopped, but didn't turn. "Are you angry?" Her eyes seemed to find the carpet supremely fascinatin'.

I aimed and let my bladder loose. I pissed again, forever. I finished and replied, "Ya can't do like we've been doin' and 'spect nothin' to happen."

Beth leaned on the door jamb. "Does that mean you're not angry at me?"

I laid my hands on her shoulders and kissed her neck. "S'not your fault, darlin'. I'm more to blame, here. Though... it _does _take 'two to tango', so they say."

She snorted. "When there was a 'they', huh?"

I smiled ruefully. "Yeah. Do ya... want 'im?"

She turned in my arms, her face angry. "Of course I want him! Are you new?! Jesus, Daryl, what the hell are you thinking, asking me something like that?"

Now _I _found the floor fascinatin'. "After what happened to Lori, I... I just thought..."

"I'm not Lori." She reached out to stroke my face. "She didn't have what I have."

I looked at her in confusion. "How so?"

Beth smiled, her thumb rubbin' my bottom lip. "_You_, Daryl. She didn't have you."

I smiled back, my hand atop hers. "Ya got a lot of faith in a guy who's more klutz'n hunter these days."

She shrugged. "It's just bad luck, is all." She kissed me. "It'll get better."

I reached out to touch her stomach, which was still flat. Her bony hips jutted out, she was so skinny.

"Wow... Our own little Asskicker." I was havin' a hard time wrappin' my mind 'round all this.

Beth laughed. "I hope he has your eyes."

"What makes ya so sure it's a he?"

She shrugged again. "Just a feeling I've got."

I raised my brow. "Well, I'm gonna hope for a little girl then, just to be _oh contrare_." I winked. "That's right, I know French."

She looked at me like I was full of grade A bullshit. "Je n'en avais aucune idée." Smiled.

I glared. "Fine. I don't know French. Smartass." I crossed my arms, swayin' a little.

She braced my elbows gently. "But I'm _your _smartass, hon."

"So ya are. Huh. I'm gonna be a Daddy..."

She grinned.

I recalled my earlier thoughts 'bout fatherhood. I'd thought I'd be a horrible dad - like my own. But as soon as she'd told me I was goin' to be a father, that all changed. I shook my head. I could never do to my child what my father'd done to me. _Ever_. The thought of it made me feel sick to my stomach.

Not only had I never thought to know this feelin', I never thought that Beth, of all people, would end up bein' the mother of my child - I mean, the thought _had _crossed my mind before - but now that she was, it all seemed... Perfect. Meant to be. It tipped my decision 'tween Beth and Carol; Beth was havin' my child. She was my woman, and I was her man. She was number one and always would be. I loved her with every fiber of my bein'.

I pulled her to me and hugged her hard, kissin' her lingeringly. Her arms slid 'round my neck and we just stood there, holdin' each other, sharing our happiness.

* * *

><p>Over the followin' week I stayed in bed at Beth's request, since until I was at one hundred percent again, she didn't want me to take any chances with my health. I called her a worrywart; she told me she'd skin me if'n I did anythin' more strenuous than use the bathroom. Personally I was bettin' she'd not last the week without sex, but so far she seemed unaffected by the lack. <em>Minx<em>. I'd be lucky if _I _lasted the week, more likely.

Three days into my promise to stay abed, I snuck out while she was nappin' and looked for my ruined pants. I found 'em in the living room where she'd left 'em after my surgery, and, fishin' my secret stash outta the pocket, I tip-toed back to bed and hid it 'fore she could see what I was up to.

Beth continued to snore without abating, so I set out the small pile on the bedsheet and, usin' an old rag, began to clean 'em. When I was satisfied, I took the surgical needle I'd lifted from the pan of sterile tools she'd used and began industriously borin' holes. My fingers were too thick and it was delicate work, but I wanted this for Beth. I wanted to give her somethin' in return for the news of my impendin' fatherhood. Somethin' to show my gratitude.

She slept for a long time, almost long enough for me to finish, but 'fore I could she snorted awake and I was hard put to hide my project 'fore she saw what I'd been doin'.

I smiled at her and brushed her bangs off her face. "How'd ya sleep, baby girl?"

She yawned, smiling back. "Pretty good. I'll sleep better when you're up to par again."

I winked. "Me, too." I stroked her hip under the sheet. "I can't wait to get back to servicin' my woman."

She laughed. "Then you better get your rest, big guy. After the scare you gave me, I'm going to need all the consolation you've got."

I kissed her nose. "It's a deal, darlin'."

Beth crinkled her nose and sat up, stretching. "You hungry?"

I nodded. "Always."

"I'll go start lunch."

I watched her go, then pulled out what I'd been doin' and put my nose to the grindstone. I wanted to surprise her with her gift after supper, but if I was goin' to be done by then, I needed to get my ass in gear.

I heard her bangin' 'round in the kitchen but I was so absorbed in what I was doin' that when she brought my lunch in I only had time to wrap ever'thin' up in the rag and stuff it under my ass. Handing me my plate, she sat next to me on the bed and asked, "I was looking around earlier, and I found a bunch of DVD's."

I raised my brows. "Oh yeah?" A noodle fell outta my mouth and landed on my gut.

Beth smiled, noddin'. "Yeah... I was thinking that maybe later you and I could watch them... If you're up to it." Her finger trailed up my arm, delicately. It made my skin twitch. She plucked the noodle off my stomach and ate it.

I thought of my little project, snug under my asscheek, and looked at her face. Her eyes were glued to mine in supplication. Her sweet face was impossible to ignore.

Not that I'd wanna ignore her. _Not my sweet baby girl_.

I flicked her nose gently. "Sure, darlin'. We'll watch all the movies ya want." I winked. "After my nap." My expression got firm.

Her face fell for a second but she perked up fast. "Thanks, Daryl." She leaned over and kissed my forehead, my nose, then my mouth. She got up and left the room, but 'fore she did, she turned back and said, "Sweet dreams, doll." Blew me a kiss.

My cock was suddenly hard as granite. I smiled despite it.

As soon as she was gone I pulled out the rag from under my ass and, spreadin' it open over the tent-pole in my lap, quickly wolfed my food and got back to work. There were two pills on my plate; I ate them, too. Beth'd been makin' me eat 'em twice a day since I'd passed out. I think she was paranoid that I wouldn't heal fast enough on my own - or that I'd relapse without the help of the anti-biotics. This damn place had ever'thin', man. I smiled to myself. The girl had found us a goldmine, I had to hand it to her.

Awhile later I heard her comin' down the hall, so I stuffed my prize-filled rag under the mattress and pretended to sleep. I let my arm drag the floor and my mouth hang open, and she just stood there watchin' me for five minutes. I was dyin' to finish, but she wouldn't leave. So I rolled over, and I heard her murmur to herself, "Oh, Daryl... You're so handsome."

I smiled. _Well, I knew that! Felt good to hear it, though, hehe_.

Finally she left again, and I got up to sneak to the bathroom, where I thoroughly cleaned my little project, dug through the medicine cabinet, found what I was lookin' for, and then finished with Beth's present. I held it up and admired my handiwork. And hoped she liked it just as much.

On the way back to bed I turned the corner and ran into her head-on.

"Ow." She rubbed her face.

I whipped my fist behind my back before she could see what was in my hand. "Sorry, Beth, ya snuck up on me."

"That's okay. Next time I'll make more noise." She smiled at me. "Can't sleep?"

I drew a blank for a second, but quickly recovered. "Uh, yeah, my uh, bladder woke me up."

She smiled a little wider, like she could smell my lie. I started to panic, and rubbed my neck, embarrassed. Beth tilted her head when I offered no more explanation.

"Hmm. Nature called and you were home, huh? I feel that." She shuddered.

I frowned.

"My period, remember?"

"Oh. Yeah, I remember." _How could I forget? _The stain was still on my pants that I think she'd likely burned by now, since I hadn't seen 'em since I went lookin' for 'em. I didn't bother to get dressed lately 'cause I was "convalescing". I think she liked seein' me naked. I liked her seein' me naked. It was a win-win situation, really.

She patted my hip as she passed me. "Well, better finish your nap. I'm thinking you're well enough now to get some exercise, what do you say?" She winked and went into the bathroom.

I waggled my brows as I turned my body to follow her with my eyes - and hide my hand. "That a promise, darlin'?"

She shrugged. "If your stitches are ready to come out, I don't see any reason why not."

I grinned, and saw her eyes stray to my crotch, her own smile growin' as she shut the door. I heard her laughter from inside. I looked down and thought, _Huh, looky there. Tent-pole's back_.

While she powdered her nose I went to the store room, found a clean cloth, wrapped Beth's finished gift in it, and hid it 'fore she came back. It was near impossible to keep the smile off my face, but I managed. I sat back on the bed and wished for the thousandth time that I could go huntin', or scavengin', or just out-fuckin'-side. I was gonna to go stir-crazy if she didn't lemme out soon, or fuck me. I was bored and boredom'd never sat well with me.

I was almost actually asleep when she slid in beside me, settin' my dirty plate on a side table and snuggling into my side.

"Hmm."

I felt her smile into my pec. "Getting tired again?"

I nodded, my eyes droopin'. "Yep."

"Go to sleep then. Don't push yourself too hard, Daryl." She started to draw lazy circles around my nipple. "I know you're bored, but when you wake up again I'll remove your bandage and we'll see what we see, alright?"

I nodded again. Then died - figuratively. Guess all that work was harder on me'n I'd thought.

* * *

><p><em>Bang-bang-bang.<em>

My eyes flew open. Beth snored beside me, undisturbed. I frowned. _What the fuck? Had I dreamed that noise?_

I laid back again, resting one hand behind my head. The other was somewhere under Beth's shoulder. I was wide-awake now, anxious. The feelin' that I hadn't actually dreamed that sound at all was strong.

After a minute I couldn't take the suspense, and, carefully extractin' my arm, I went to the hatch to investigate. There was a dirty, vine-covered window in the steel panel, and from this distance I couldn't see anythin' 'cept that it was daytime outside. Frowning, I shrugged, and turned away. _Guess I did dream it_-

_Bang-bang-bang._

I stopped dead. _Holy shit_.

Lookin' back, I squinted up at the window again, and, saw a familiar face peerin' in. My lips peeled back in a wide grin.

Climbing the ladder, I called, "Just a sec!" I quickly unthreaded the quick-link, removed it, and lifted the hatch. The daylight was blindin' after so long inside, the air nippy on my bare skin.

"Daryl!"

"Oh my God, Daryl!"

Rick's hand held out to me and his grin were the best thin' I'd seen in weeks. Grippin' it, I laughed and pulled him in for a brotherly hug and a slap on the back. "Good to see ya, man."

I was half out of the bunker before I realised I was still naked and stopped my exit. Michonne smiled and discreetly turned her eyes away. Carl just grinned, Judith asleep in his arms. I smiled back at him, nodded. "This all of ya?"

Rick shook his head. "No. The others are checkin' the houses." He eyed my bare chest, his mirth on his face. "Are we uh... Interruptin' somethin'?"

I felt my cheeks heat up but I replied curtly, "Naw, was just sleepin'. I got hurt a week or so back, and Beth's been tendin' me-"

"You're with Beth?" Carl interjected. My eyes strayed back to his face.

"Yeah." I wasn't lookin' forward to tellin' 'em that I'd lost her, too, but gotten her back, thank God.

"Maggie will be glad to hear that." Michonne said.

"Listen, I'm gonna go get dressed. Come on down when ya got ever'one together, alright?"

Rick nodded. I closed the hatch, and climbed back down the ladder. This little reunion put a kink in my after-dinner plans with Beth, but we were all together again. There was no better feelin' than that, and I was glad, but... I didn't want my time alone with Beth to be over. I was torn 'tween bein' happy the others were here and annoyed at 'em for interrupting.

After I'd found some khakis in the store-room, I shook Beth awake gently.

"Hmm?"

"Wake up, darlin'." I could hear the hatch opening and everyone talkin' as they climbed inside. I kissed her eyes. "I got a big surprise for ya."

Beth rolled over and frowned at me blearily. "What?"

I pulled a clean shirt out of a folded pile next to the bed, slippin' into it and hastily doing up the buttons. "Come on, baby girl."

She got up and, hearin' the voices, she paused, staring at me. I smiled as Rick's voice, Michonne's, and Tyreese's became clear in all the din. Her lips curled up and she rushed past me out of the room.

When I got to where ever'one had gathered in the kitchen, smiles were ever'where as Beth and Maggie saw each other for the first time in nearly two months. Maggie dropped her pack and cried, "Beth! Oh my God!"

Beth crushed her sister, tears of joy rollin' down her cheeks. I smiled at Rick as he stood next to me, watching. I looked through all the familiar faces; a couple were missin', but I was interested in one in particular. "No Carol?"

Rick hesitated, looked at the floor, then back at me. "She's around."

I raised my brow.

He held up his hands in a placating manner. "I know, I know what you're thinkin', but, well... She saved us."

Now I frowned.

"We went to Terminus. Turned out to be one big fuckin' lie. They were... Eatin' people." He looked at me intensely. "If Carol hadn't come along when she did... Glenn, Bob, and I would've all been slaughtered right there."

I spotted some new faces among the group. "Were ya all trapped there?"

He nodded. "All except Tyreese, Judith, and Carol. She got us all out, single-handed." He rested his hand on his Python. "I let her back in. I had to. I still don't know 'bout what she did... And Lizzie and Mika weren't with them when they found us... But I owed it to her. She looked after my little girl."

I nodded. "I don't wanna repeat my opinion that kickin' her out was the wrong decision, but lettin' her back in was the right one."

He didn't smile, but his eyes told me he was happy. "Yeah. I feel better 'bout her now, anyway."

I slapped his shoulder, smiled. "Good."

"She wasn't finished checkin' the last house. Tyreese said she'd be along."

I chewed my lip. I was anxious to see Carol again, and glad that she was okay. But what was really on my mind was how Beth and I were gonna to tell ever'one that we were an item - and that she was carryin' my child.

The new people - Abraham, Rosita, and Eugene - kept to themselves while the rest of us hugged and cried and kissed, finally together again after so long. I shook hands with Tyreese, Glenn, and Carl. Held Judith for a moment, kissed her downy blond head. She smiled up at me and gripped the collar of my shirt with sticky fingers, and I held her close, imaginin' how my own young'un would feel when he finally came and I could hold him close to me. I handed her off to Rick when Maggie approached me, fresh tears still coursin' down her dirty cheeks. Her smile was beautific.

"Daryl... I can't thank you enough for keepin' Beth safe." She kissed my cheek and hugged my neck, despite my surprised flinch when she came at me. She pretended not to notice, and I hesitantly hugged her back, wonderin' just how long this benign attitude of hers would last toward me.

I shrugged as she let me go. "I dunno; she kept me pretty safe, herself." I winked at Beth, and she smiled the smile I loved.

Sasha and another girl I didn't know, whom she introduced as Tara, hugged me when their turn came. "Bob?" I asked Sasha.

She shook her head, her eyes tearin'.

"I'm sorry," I told her. She nodded and thanked me.

I nodded at the new people, and they nodded back as they were introduced to me, and I to them. Beth stuck close to my side, talkin' to Maggie and Glenn, while Rick went through the formalities.

When we'd finally all greeted each other, Sasha asked, "How long have you two been here?"

Beth and I looked at each other. I found myself anxious to have a moment alone with her, to see how we were gonna to play this out, but knew that less'n I asked for it, I'd not get the chance.

"About three weeks or so." Beth answered. Personally, I really wasn't sure how long we'd been here. I'd been out of it for quite a while.

In all the hubbub no one had heard Carol come in, but we all heard her say, "Daryl?"

I turned, a smile spreadin' my lips as I went to her, takin' her in my arms and lifting her off the floor. I felt tears prick my eyes but held them back, hard.

Carol squeezed me back, her tears flowin' freely. I let her go and she kissed my cheek, her hand cuppin' my jaw.

"I'm so happy you're safe," she whispered.

I smiled, "Me, too, Carol. I'm real glad to see ya."

My chest felt tight with emotion; she wouldn't let go of my hand as we joined the others.

* * *

><p>Later that night we all sat 'round the living room, tradin' stories and news 'bout what had happened since we'd seen each other last, empty cans scattered all 'round. Carol sat next to me, my hand still firmly clasped in hers; Beth sat across the room, her head on her sister's shoulder, their fingers entwined, but her eyes never left my face, and mine never strayed far from hers. As good as it was to see Carol - and ever'one else - again, I wished it was Beth's hand in mine right now, her warmth at my side.<p>

Rick bounced Judith in his lap, her small fist shootin' out to offer him a handful of canned Scooby Doo's. Rick let her feed him, and we all smiled.

"So, Daryl."

I turned to Glenn, my brows raised.

"You haven't told us what happened to you and Beth after..." He trailed off, but we all knew what he was talkin' 'bout. The attack at the Prison.

My eyes darted back to Beth, but she was already standin' up. "I think that story is best left for tomorrow." Approaching me, her face carefully neutral, she held out her hand to me. "Daryl was injured a few weeks ago, and he had a terrible infection. It's time to go to bed for him."

There were smiles at Beth's scoldin', maternal tone. I think they all expected me to balk, or say somethin' nasty, but I enjoyed the surprise on all their faces as I got up obediently and took her hand, followin' her out of the room.

"Doctor's orders," I said, tiltin' my head in her direction. "'Night, ever'body."

Beth stopped at the door and turned back to address the room at large. "You can all sleep in here tonight. It's been a long day for everyone, and I imagine you're all tired."

No one asked Beth where _she _was sleepin', but the air was baited, tense, as we left the room. I smiled at her back, bettin' they were all mad with curiosity 'bout our sleepin' arrangements, but still too polite to ask outright.

As she led me down the hall, I could hear low whispers following us. When we reached our bedroom she turned to look at me, her hands comin' up to grasp handfuls of my shirt as she stood on tip-toe to kiss me lingeringly.

I closed the door silently behind us as her arms snaked 'round my neck, and when we broke apart for air I chuckled.

"What I wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall in there right now."

She grinned. "No shit. I think my sister is about to tear her hair out in curiosity. God," she sighed, "I was in agony being away from you."

I tweaked her nose. "Ditto, darlin'. I was wishin' it was you beside me all night."

She smiled, but then her lips flattened into a line. "Daryl, how are we...?"

"Gonna tell 'em 'bout us?" I rocked her gently. "We'll tell 'em whatever ya want, darlin', though I think we oughta tell 'em the truth."

She nodded. "I think so, too, I'm just anxious about what Maggie will say."

I squeezed her gently. "If she loves ya like I think she does, she'll be happy for ya." I hoped I sounded more confident than I felt. I had a feelin' that our news wouldn't go over well - with anyone. But Beth and me... We were together, and that was that. They'd just have to accept it. Personally, I was more worried about Carol's reaction, but I kept that to myself. No point in worryin' Beth any more'n I had to.

"'Sides, we kinda just left for bed together... It's subtle, but the bottom line's pretty obvious." I chewed my lip. "At worst, we'll be answerin' their questions pretty early tomorrow."

She raised a brow. "True." She sighed.

Pecking her lips, I said, "Be right back. Get into bed, honey, and I'll be with ya shortly."

I opened the bedroom door and slipped out, headin' toward the hatch. Climbing the ladder, I closed the thread on the quick-link, securing us all in for the night. As I climbed back down I smiled to myself. I was finally gonna to get to give Beth her gift, and even if we'd have to forgo sex tonight, I was still in a good enough mood not to be _too _put out by it. Today'd been a good day. That was enough.

Swingin' by the bathroom 'fore returning to Beth, I waited outside until whoever was in there was finished. I crossed my fingers 'hind my back that it wasn't Carol.

The door opened and Maggie came out, wipin' her hands on her pants. I guessed Beth hadn't gotten 'round to hangin' up a new hand towel yet, so I opened the nearest closet lookin' for one. I handed it to Maggie and she smiled, thanking me as she finished dryin' her hands, handing me back the towel when she was done. We stared at each other in the dim light comin' down the hall from the living room, the voices of the others unitelligible from this distance. I started to feel awkward.

"Beth sleepin' with you?"

Her bald question caught me off guard, but only for a second. Maggie wasn't known for her subtlety.

Still, I was unsure how to answer her question, though my first impulse was to answer, just as baldy, that yeah Beth was sleepin' with me, and did she have a problem with that?! But instead, I just stared back, chewin' my lip.

Maggie pursed her lips but didn't pry any further. Still, she was rather stiff when she replied, "Goodnight, Daryl."

"'Night." I closed the bathroom door behind me and let out the breath I'd been holdin', knowin' that my refusal to answer was an answer in itself. I dreaded what Beth and I might wake up to tomorrow mornin', but resigned myself to the fact that I knew what was comin', at least.

I pissed, thinkin' again that no sex tonight was kinda disappointin'. Flushing and flicking off the light, I headed back to our room, anxious to get into bed with my woman and shut the rest of the world out, so it was just us again. I'd really missed the others, but I found myself missin' my time alone with Beth already. Time that was spent loungin' naked, leisurely, makin' love and eating whenever we felt like it. That was over, now. I sighed. _Back to reality_.

Beth smiled at me as I came in, and as soon as I shut the door and locked it, I was peelin' my clothes off and leavin' a trail all the way to bed, her smile drawin' me in like a moth to a flame. Crawling in next to her, I kissed her mouth, wetly, happy to discover she was naked, too. _Maybe, if'n we were real quiet..._

"Hmm, hold on a minute, darlin'." I broke our kiss and leaned over, pullin' the cloth containing her gift out from under my side of the bed.

"I almost forgot to give this to ya. I hope ya like it."

She took the small package from me, her smile bright. "What is it?"

I watched as she unwrapped it, my lip curlin' up as she finally opened the last fold, the necklace I'd made for her from the teeth and claws of the mountain lion I'd killed nestled in the middle of the white square of fabric.

She looked at me in shock, but her smile never left her lips. "Daryl... It's beautiful, thank you!"

I shrugged. "I know it ain't diamonds or gold, and I strung it with dental floss, but it's from my heart, Beth."

She looked up at me, her eyes wet. "I love it, Daryl. I don't care if it's not gold - no one else has one like it." She held up her hair so I could tie the teeth around her neck, and then she wound her arms 'round me, her tongue dueling mine ferociously.

"Why the gift?" She asked 'tween kisses.

I smiled. "'Cause ya gave me the best gift of all, Bethy. I'm just tryin' to return the favour."

She wrinkled her brow. "I did?"

I tucked a blond lock behind her ear. "Ya did. It ain't ever' day your woman tells ya you're gonna be a Daddy."

Beth laughed. "I did, didn't I? Well, I think we better get those stitches out before I go crazy from not having you, Daryl Dixon."

I waggled my brows. "I'm putty in your hands, darlin'."

It only took her and her knife a moment to remove my stitches and, satisfied that I was completely healed, she slid into my arms again, murmuring, "God, I love you, Daryl. Make love to me, now. Please. Before I burn up."

"Yes, ma'am," I chuckled, turnin' out the lamp. I knew she'd've never lasted the week without me satisfyin' her. _Thank God, 'cause neither would I._

* * *

><p>When I woke up again, I was alone in the bed. The bedroom door was open, so I pulled on my pants and went lookin' for Beth.<p>

I found her in the kitchen, Judith on her hip, singin' softly and stirring baby cereal in a pot on the range. I leaned in the doorway and just watched her. She handled that baby like a pro, like she hadn't forgotten a thin' even after two months away from Judy. They smiled at each other as Beth rocked gently back and forth, and Judy reached up to touch Beth's lips, as if amazed at the sound comin' out from 'tween them.

Beth smiled when she spotted me, and Judy did too, her outstretched arms in my direction bringin' out a full grin on my face. I took her from Beth and held her tight, tickling her tummy.

"Mornin', ladies."

"Morning. How'd you sleep?"

I stared at her over Judy's head. "Great. You?"

Her smile was beautiful. "Like a baby." She reached out to tweak Judy's nose. "Everyone's still asleep, even Rick. This one was wide awake though, so I thought I'd amuse her while they caught up on their rest."

I nodded. "I hear that. I ain't never seen Rick look so tired. Rest'll do 'im good." I shifted Judy to my other arm. "I'm thinkin' 'bout goin' huntin'."

She looked up from stirring the pot. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I ain't gonna leave ya alone to deal with all the questions by yourself, though. I'll go after we've gotten ever'thin' straightened out."

Beth winked, and leaned past Judy to kiss me deeply. "What did I ever do to deserve a man like you?"

I chuckled. "Love ya, too."

We smiled into our next kiss.

"Ahem."

We both turned to look at the doorway. Rick stood there, his hands in his pockets and a sheepish look on his scruffy face.

"Mornin', you two."

I nodded. Beth smiled, replying, "Good morning. I hope you don't mind, but Judy was awake, so..."

Rick shook his head. "Not at all, in fact, I'm grateful. Thank you." He slowly came into the room to lean against the bar. "So..."

_Wow. This was awkward_. I rubbed the back of my neck and stared at the floor, bouncin' Judy on my hip. Beth's cheeks were stained pink and Rick's silence was heavier'n lead. Finally I spoke up.

"I take it there was some talk last night."

Rick avoided my eyes and reached out to touch Judy's hair. "You could say that, yeah. Maggie's pretty upset. Carol, too."

_Great. Ugh._

Beth asked, "What did Maggie say?"

Rick shrugged. "Not much, really, but it's pretty obvious she's mad. Glenn had a hell of a time gettin' to sleep last night, heh. Poor guy."

Beth frowned, and my gut dropped. I didn't want her and Maggie to fight, but Beth had a right to her happiness. I found myself mentally plannin' what I'd say to Maggie, should we ever find ourselves in an argument over Beth.

"Great. Just great." Beth sighed, and turned off the flame. "Her cereal's ready."

I handed Judy to Rick while Beth dished out the mush into a bowl, bringin' it over to the bar and handing Rick a spoon. He smiled and thanked her, and we left the room so he and Judy could be alone.

In the hall outside our room, Beth slipped her arms 'round my waist and laid her face on my chest. "What do we do now, Daryl?"

I held her back, shrugging. "Play thin's by ear, I guess. If your sister's got a bone to pick with us, she'll let us know. Until then... " I shrugged again. "Ya sure I'm who ya want?"

She looked up at me, her face curious. "Of course. I love you, Daryl."

I stared back into her eyes. "What if Maggie don't want ya with me? I don't wanna come 'tween you's, or cause any hard feelin's. Merle never came 'tween me and a woman, but he never had the chance to, neither. If'n he'd ever tried to tell me to leave ya..." I frowned, looking over her head at the wall, "I'd'a told him to go fuck hisself."

Beth laughed a little. "I doubt he'd have taken that too well." She sighed again. "I love my sister, but she's not my mama. I don't have to do what she says. I want to be with you."

I smiled and kissed her mouth. "I wanna be with ya, too."

Letting each other go, I went back into our room to finish gettin' dressed, and Beth went to the bathroom. While I was searching for a shirt, I heard her come back past our room, go to the kitchen, and start talkin' to Rick. Distantly, I heard him ask her 'bout her necklace, and I smiled.

"Daryl?"

I looked behind me. Carol stood in the doorway, her hair mussed from sleep. I went back to what I was doin' after I smiled at her. "Mornin', Carol. What's up?"

She leaned on the jamb, watching me while I pulled on a shirt and started to button it up. I turned 'round to face her when I got to the last button.

"Is it true?"

I frowned, my gut flippin'. _Was this gonna to be a constant til ever'one had accepted the fact that Beth and I were in love? _Because, I gotta admit, all this potential judgement was startin' to get old, and we hadn't even discussed it openly yet. This was no one's business but mine and Beth's, but somehow, I had a feelin' that it was gonna become _ever'one's _business 'fore too long.

"Is what true?"

"You and Beth." Her face fell a little, but her expression remained carefully blank. If I didn't know Carol so well, I'd say she was simply curious, but I knew that inside, she was hurtin'. I sighed. I'd never had to let a woman down gently; I wasn't sure exactly how to go 'bout it. I hoped that I didn't fuck thin's up too horribly if I just took it slow.

"We been alone together a long time, Carol." I waited for her reaction. It came swiftly.

"So? Daryl, she's almost twenty years younger than you. Doesn't that bother you?"

I shrugged, but inwardly I was a startin' to feel angry. "No, it don't bother me. Why should it?" I crossed my arms. "Does it bother you?"

She glared at me, her first facial indicator of her anger, and I knew. I knew it bothered her; it bothered her a lot. But was that 'cause Beth was so much younger'n me, or 'cause I hadn't chosen Carol, herself?

"Hell yes, it bothers me! She's way too young for you. I can't believe you would sink so low as to seduce a teenager, Daryl. It's disgusting."

My brows came down, hard. Those were fightin' words, far as I was concerned. Fuck lettin' her down gently.

"Why? Why is that disgustin', Carol? Beth and I been through a lot together. A lot. Ya don't know even the half of it. Don't ya dare judge me when none of my affairs are any of your business, ya hear me? Ya don't hear me harpin' on you 'bout Karen and David. Or the girls, for that matter. Where're they?"

Carol's face fell slack, her shock plain.

"That's right, I know 'bout what ya did at the Prison. I was damn angry when Rick told me he'd kicked ya out, and when we found the others, I promised myself I'd look for ya, 'cause I owed it to ya as your friend to make sure ya were safe. So don't go actin' all high and mighty when your halo's just as tarnished, Carol Peletier. Ya got that?"

I stomped past her outta the room. She moved aside, lettin' me pass, 'cause I woulda knocked her on her ass if she hadn't.

_Sonofabitch. _Did _ever'one _think I was disgustin', now? I balled my fists. _How dared they come into mine and Beth's home - and it was ours, we'd fuckin' found it, goddammit - and lay their judgements at my feet?! _

I got to the kitchen and Beth immediately came to me. "Are you alright?" Her concern was clear on her face.

I squeezed her shoulder and kissed her temple. "No, I ain't alright. It's time we woke ever'one up and had us a talk."

Rick's eyes were slightly wide as he watched us, and when I saw him starin' I growled, "Ya gonna tell me my business too, Grimes?"

He held up his hands immediately, in surrender. "I wasn't gonna say anythin', Daryl. What you do is your affair, not mine. I respect ya."

I nodded curtly. "Good. Thanks, Rick. Sorry I was short with ya."

Rick grinned. "No hard feelin's, brother." He slapped my shoulder, and I smiled. He remarked, "I was just askin' Beth here about her necklace. That's quite the craftsmanship there, Dixon. Very unique."

"She deserves it. She's a good girl, my Beth." I smiled down at her, and she smiled back, peckin' my nose.

"Are you sure you're okay with us?" Beth asked him. I raised my brow.

Rick spooned up some more mush for Judy. "Ain't my house, Beth, or my rules. I know Daryl well enough by now to know that he does what's right. I've never doubted him." He smiled.

It felt good to at least have one person on our side.

* * *

><p>Beth, Rick, and Judith followed me into the living room where ever'one had spent the night. A few of them were up, and looked at us as we came in, and I could see in their faces that they'd been talkin' 'bout Beth and me. It made me fuckin' furious, but I did my best to keep a lid on my temper.<p>

"Wake the hell up. We got shit to discuss."

Slowly ever'one either stood or sat up. Maggie was the last to rise, and the anger in her eyes was almost tangible. I looked at her hard 'fore scannin' the room.

"What is it, Daryl?" Sasha asked, her voice low. Wary.

Beth slipped her hand into mine.

Before I could open my mouth, she said, "We know what you've been saying about us."

The silence was practically deafening after Beth's statement. Many exchanged guilty glances. Maggie stood, her arms straight at her sides, fists clenched.

"Is it true?" Her mouth was set in a grim line. Glenn stood up behind her, as if ready to hold her back. His face was tired; drained.

I looked at her head on, my eyes narrowin'. I didn't wanna fight with Maggie, but I would defend my choice to be with Beth to my dyin' breath.

"Yeah, it is. I love Beth, and she loves me. We're together, like you and Glenn. We're happy. Can ya accept that?"

Maggie's gaze strayed to Beth's. "Is that how you feel, Beth? You wanna be with him?"

Beth nodded solidly. "Yes. I love him."

Maggie's face took on an angrier tilt. "You're too young to know what love is, Beth. He's too old. This relationship is practically rape!"

My brows came down hard, and Beth yanked on my arm hard when I tried to take a step toward her sister. "The fuck?! I ain't no fuckin' rapist, Maggie!"

She stepped toward me before Glenn could grab her and was in my face quickly.

"Yes, it is! Whether or not she consented doesn't matter! She's _my _sister, and I say she's too young for you! You got off easy last night, Dixon, but you aren't gonna get away with this anymore! Beth, come here honey."

I glared hard at Maggie, my temper boilin'. I'd never wanted to hit a woman as much as I wanted to hit her right now.

"No, Maggie."

Maggie's mouth dropped open a little, but she recovered from her shock quickly. "I said come here, Beth. _Now_."

Ever'one watched, tense, as the sisters faced off. Beth stood her ground. Glenn finally broke the strained silence.

"Maggie, maybe we should leave them alone. It's not our place to-"

"The hell it's not, Glenn! She is my baby sister! I have every right to protect her!"

Sasha spoke up, "Maggie, Beth's old enough to decide for herself-"

"-I think Maggie's right." That was Carol. _Traitor_.

Rick stepped in. "Hold up now, Maggie. You don't know the whole story. None of us do. But Daryl's a good man. I know you know that, we've depended on him a million times before to watch our backs, and he's done everythin' short of dying to protect this group from harm. He's kept Beth safe for two months on his own. I think he deserves the benefit of the doubt, don't you?"

Maggie clenched her jaw. Glenn rested his palms on her shoulders, sayin' low, "Come on, Maggie. Let him say his piece."

Michonne stood up to take Judith from Rick, and then Rick turned to me.

"Daryl, I know that what's between you and Beth is none of our business, and I know you're back's up 'cause we're bein' so nosy, but Maggie is Beth's sister and she, at least, has a right to know. If you want the rest of us to leave while you sort things out, we'll go."

I looked around at the faces of all the people I'd come to regard as my family, and my anger began to fade a little.

"Naw, ya can stay. If ya can understand Beth and me, then maybe they can, too. 'Sides, I only wanna hafta tell this once."

Rick nodded. "Alright then."

Maggie, arms crossed, sat down on one of the couches next to Glenn. "This better be good."

I glanced at her sharply as I sat down in a vacant easy chair, Beth sittin' on the arm, leaning her weight against my shoulder. Our hands never parted, resting on her knee when she was finally comfortable.

I opened my mouth to tell them 'bout what Beth and I had been through, but she stopped me.

"Daryl? Can I tell it?" Her eyes were wide, clear, and earnest. Frankly, I was glad she'd volunteered. I'd rather tell nobody nothin', but in order to make Maggie back off, we had to. She was the more colloquial of the two of us, so after a second, I nodded. She smiled and squeezed my fingers.

All eyes settled on Beth as she began our story.

"After the Governor attacked, I went back inside C Block looking for Judith, but I didn't find her. When I came out again everyone was gone except Daryl. The walkers were getting thick, so we ran. We ran until we were exhausted, and we spent the first night in the trunk of an old car, while the herd went through. The next few days we spent camping and foraging, and then we found the country club."

I was glad that she wasn't gettin' into too much detail, here. There'd been a lot of fightin' and arguin' in those first few days, I'll tell ya. Had I only known then how fun it would become to wind her up and make her flush prettily, I'd'a started doin' it long before.

"After that we found a moonshiner's shack, and had some moonshine, which, now that I think back on it, probably wasn't the smartest thing we could've done, but we ended up learning a lot about each other that day. I learned why Daryl is the way he is, and he learned that he could trust me." She kissed my temple.

Maggie frowned. "You were drinkin'? Why the hell would you do that?"

Beth stared her down, and I smiled.

"We'd been having a rough time. I was still distraught over what had happened to Daddy, and Daryl was just numb. He wouldn't talk about it. So I thought that maybe if we found some alcohol, it would loosen him up. It did."

I snorted. _If by "loosen up" ya mean act like a dickhead._

"Why _is _Daryl the way he is?" Michonne grinned at me over Judith's head. I made a face at her and she laughed.

Beth smiled. "That's his secret to tell if he wants."

I kissed her knuckles. "'Atta girl."

Maggie growled, "Don't change the subject."

Beth cleared her throat and continued.

"After we'd moved on we found a funeral home, one we thought was abandoned. We spent a night there, and that was when we had a few... Moments, I guess you could say. He told me he didn't really hate my singing, and even though he never did say the words, I knew I'd changed his mind about there still being good people in the world. Before anything else could happen, though, it all went to hell."

"Did it ever." I mumbled, sighing, rubbin' my brow with my thumb.

"What happened?" Sasha asked.

I looked around the room, notin' how wrapped everyone was in Beth's story. For two rather mediocre people, we sure seemed to be interestin' to 'em. I was goin' to revise my opinion on the good people thin', though, if Maggie didn't get the hell off my back soon.

"Well, earlier that day Daryl found a dog, but it wouldn't come to him. So he strung up the alarm and when we heard it rattle, he assumed it was the dog come back to investigate, but when Daryl opened the door to offer him some meat, the porch was crowded with walkers. He couldn't keep them out, so he led them to the basement and told me to get out and go to the road, and that he would meet me there. I didn't want to leave him behind, but I had no choice because they started following me, too. I don't know what happened to him after that, because when I did finally make it to the road, I was abducted by two douchebags in a black car."

I met Maggie's eyes, and hers narrowed, as if to say, _You let her get abducted?!_ I glared back. That was still a sore spot with me, and I felt bad enough 'bout it without her rubbin' it in, goddammit. The memory of what it felt like to lose her still made my gut roll in anxiety.

"They drove away with me in the trunk, but when they finally stopped I kicked one in his balls and slashed the other across the gut, stole their car, and drove until I got to a crossroad, but I didn't know how to get back to the funeral home from there, so I abandoned the car and continued on foot. Daryl hadn't had time to teach me much about tracking, but I could tell that _something _had happened there, in the leaves and mudprints on the road, and I followed their path into the woods. I got really lucky and happened across the right camp that night, just as this one was sneaking out." She nudged my shoulder. "Smart, since the men he was camping with turned out to be an unsavoury bunch of dickwads."

"I can't believe Daryl would deal with dickheads," Carl remarked, "I thought for sure Merle was enough!"

"Hush up, Carl." Rick made a face at him and shook his head, and Carl shut up, his face pink. I smiled a little; he was right, though.

Beth laughed. "Well, neither did I, but it was just a temporary thing, or it was supposed to be, until he found me, but I found him instead and we sneaked away. Unfortunately, they decided to follow us."

"What did you guys do?" Carl asked.

"After we crossed the river, we covered our tracks, but they were closer 'hind than I thought, only a few hours. They caught up with us after we got out into open farmland and found us a house to hole up in through a storm." I wasn't about to tell ever'one 'bout Beth's unexpected period disaster and my awkwardness at her first confession of love toward me.

"That was a scary night." Beth shuddered at the memory. "Daryl hid me in the barn while he killed those bastards, and he tried to tell me to leave him behind if he wasn't back by sun-up; he even gave me his crossbow, and _that _scared the crap out of me. I thought it meant that he didn't expect to make it through the night."

I stared at my lap, rememberin' that, at the time, the possibility that she was right was probably higher'n I'd imagined. And she'd been right, 'cause I almost hadn't made it; I'd have died in that loft if it weren't for Beth. I looked up to see if Maggie's face had softened yet. Instead of glarin' at me, now her eyes held a glint of curiosity that wasn't there before. But the hard lines of disapproval still bracketed her mouth.

"He managed to kill all of them but one, Joe. Joe did terrible things to him, trying to make him confess to where he'd hidden me." She ran her fingers through my hair. I allowed it. Normally, PDA like that would embarrass me, but we had a point to prove here, so I didn't stop her.

I didn't like rememberin' what she told them next. My weakness should be my business, alone.

"When I confronted Joe against Daryl's wishes, I was shocked at the scene I'd walked into. He had Daryl trussed up, badly beaten, and he was whipping his legs with a salt-soaked rope. Daryl was in bad shape. I accidentally killed Joe after he came at me and we both fell down the stairs, but my landing on him and breaking his neck didn't lessen his threat. He came back faster than I'd anticipated and I was hard put to get Daryl out of danger before he was after us. We spent three weeks at that farm before Daryl was well enough to travel again. He'd been shot, beaten to a pulp, whipped, and several ribs were broken. He was blind from shock for most of that time. He was going to sacrifice himself to keep me safe - but I couldn't bear to sit and listen to his screams of pain any longer. Do you still think he's so awful now, Maggie?" Tears rolled down Beth's cheeks.

Maggie's eyes were wet too, but her lips were still set, bending but not broken, yet. After this point I took over because Beth was cryin'. I pulled her into my shoulder and held her, inwardly hating that they all knew of my weakness, now. It made my voice low, quiet. Gritty.

"When we got back on the road, we found some tracks and followed 'em, hopin' to cross back over the Yellowjacket and maybe end up back at the Prison, to see if any of you's had come back or regrouped. I hurt myself crossin' the rail bridge over the river and Beth took care of my wound as best she could. One night we killed a mountain lion that hunted us. Until Beth found this place, I was havin' a bad time with my leg. Beth got me here, cleaned my wound, and saved my life when I got real sick from the infection in my thigh. Beth's done more for me in the last two months than anyone's ever done for me my whole life. I love 'er. She saved me, not just from walkers or assholes like Joe. She saved me from myself. I've been in a bad place for a long, long time, but Beth's been the light. And just recently... She gave me the best news of my life."

The silence was deafening, but ever'one, over the course of our story, was leanin' forward in anticipation of what I had to say next. Ever'one 'cept Carol and Maggie, that is.

"Well, what did she tell you?" Carl finally broke the quiet.

I chewed my lip, tryin' to contain my smile. "She told me I'm gonna be a Daddy."

Maggie's eyes closed, her hand coverin' her mouth. The others, however, didn't seem to be too shocked, in fact, some of them were smilin'. Rick, Michonne, Sasha and Carl were just a few. Tyreese smiled too, restin' his hand on Sasha's shoulder. Judy gurgled. Carol got up abruptly and left the room.

Rick watched her leave and put a hand on my shoulder. "I'll talk to her." He followed Carol out.

I nodded. Then I looked at Glenn, and he smiled. Maggie was leanin' over her knees, her hair covering her face. Beth got up and went to her, takin' her hand, and Maggie finally looked at her.

"You're pregnant."

Beth nodded, smiling. "Yeah."

Maggie's eyes slid to me and turned cold as ice. "You fucking knocked up my little sister?!" She practically screamed.

I clamped my lips together 'fore somethin' I'd regret came boilin' from my mouth, but containing my anger at her was really gettin' to be an issue. If this wasn't resolved soon, I was gonna do somethin' to somebody, and it wasn't gonna be pretty.

Beth pulled her hand back and her brows came down, makin' her look 'bout as threatening as a tree stump, but her voice, when she spoke, was dead serious, and I knew that she was nearin' the end of her patience, too.

"For Christ's sake, Maggie! Didn't you hear a word I said?! He took care of me! He saved me. Fuck, he was ready to _die _to defend me! _Die_! Can you say the same of Glenn?!"

The look on Glenn's face was so chagrined at her question that if I hadn't been so damned angry I would've laughed.

Maggie shot up off the couch, pointin' her finger in my direction. "Glenn isn't twenty years older than me! Stop avoiding the issue, Beth! What you two are doing is practically statutory rape! Just because Daryl kept you alive doesn't give him the right to fuck you! You don't owe him anything, Beth. You don't." Her tears were rolling now, and showin' no signs of stoppin'.

Beth's mouth was a hard line, and she backed up, standing next to me and takin' my hand in hers. "I love Daryl, Maggie, and not because I owe him. I love him for _himself_, and I don't care if you don't approve. You're not my mother, and Daddy's gone. I'm nineteen-fucking-years old! I can do as I please, with whom I please, _and there's nothing you can do about it_."

Her voice was so calmly serious at the end of her sentence, the whole room didn't dare move. Beth's wrath was clear in her eyes and the stiffness of her posture. Maggie glared at her, clenching her fists at her sides. Glenn hovered behind, preparing to hold her back if and when she moved, but for a long moment all she did was stare at Beth, and Beth at her. I looked 'tween the two, thinkin' I should say somethin' but hadn't the slightest clue where to even begin unravelling this mess.

Finally Maggie took a deep breath.

Glenn said quietly, holdin' onto her shoulders, "Maggie, this is an apocalypse. Things like moral codes of conduct don't really apply anymore. I know it's hard to accept, but... Well, Beth's right."

"_Why_?! Why don't they exist anymore, Glenn? Are you saying that, just because most of humanity is dead and walking, we have to give up ours?" She shook her head, lookin' at him in disgust. "How can you say that?"

He slipped his hands in his pockets, his face fallin' at her look. I felt for him; Maggie was a spitfire, and when she set out to hurt, she cut deep. Now Glenn was at the end of her verbal knife, and I kinda wished he'd stand up to her, if'n only to preserve his masculinity. Take his balls outta her purse, dust 'em off, and put 'em back where they belonged, as it were.

To my surprise, he looked up at her and there was a hint of rebellion in his eyes.

"What do you want to do then, huh? Leave, just because you're having a moral dilemma? You just found her after two months apart. And, I mean, they're in love, Maggie. Don't you remember when your Dad tried to keep us apart when we fell in love? For me, that was agony. I wanted you so badly, and we were losing more friends and family every day, we didn't know when any one of us might be next, and he was standing between us and our happiness. It almost drove me crazy. I'd never wish that on anyone, Maggie. You shouldn't, either."

The shock on Maggie's face was priceless. Glenn, he could really lay down a guilt trip when he wanted to, I had to give him credit. _Maybe only one ball was in her purse..._

Glenn kept goin', hammering his point home. "The world isn't the same anymore, Maggie. We have to take love when we find it, and keep it as long as we can. Life's really too short now to quibble over an age gap. Don't you think it's more important that Beth is happy?"

Breathin' hard through her nose, Maggie spun around and left the room, and we all heard the bathroom door slam shut a few seconds later. Glenn dropped his head to his chest and ran a hand through his hair, looking defeated.

"Glenn."

He looked up at me. I nodded. "Thanks, man."

He smiled tiredly, sittin' back down on the couch. "Yeah. You owe me big for this one, Dixon."

I nodded again. I knew I owed him; he'd be in the doghouse with Maggie for a while. But if he was willin' to risk her wrath to defend Beth and me, what we had together couldn't be as bad as she made it out to be. _It couldn't_.

Beth leaned her head on my chest. I cupped her neck and kissed her temple. "It's alright, darlin'. She'll come 'round. Glenn'll talk her down eventually."

Glenn rolled his eyes, clearly doubting my faith in him, but Beth looked up at me, sadly shakin' her head. "I don't know, Daryl. Maggie can be damn stubborn when she wants to be."

I raised my brows. "Well, so can I. And I say I ain't givin' ya up, Beth. I'll do what I can to convince her, but whether or not she comes 'round, it don't change the fact that you're my girl." I leaned my head against hers, embarrassed to admit this so openly, so my voice was low when I said, "I love ya, darlin'. I won't never stop fightin' for ya."

She slipped her arms around my chest, squeezin' me tight. I kissed her crown and looked around the room at all the smiling faces.

Carl got up and walked over to us, holdin' out his hand. I took it and he shook it firmly. "Congratulations, you guys."

Beth turned her head to smile at him.

"Thanks, little man," I winked. Sasha, grinning, followed Carl, congratulating us, and ever'one followed after her, even the four new people. They'd remained pretty quiet throughout the whole conversation, but I 'sposed that was due to bein' in a new place with new people, and didn't read anythin' into it. If Rick trusted 'em, they were fine by me.

Michonne was the last to offer her felicitations. Handing Judith off to Carl, she hugged Beth then smiled at us both in that mysterious, world-weary way she has. It made her look like the wisest woman on earth.

"Congrats, cowboy." Her voice, low-pitched as usual, for once revealed how she was really feelin'. To Beth she said, "I respect any woman who can tame this bronco." Her eyes flicked to me as she pulled Beth into her arms again and hugged her tight. I saw a tear make its way down her dark cheek. "Don't ever let him go, honey."

Beth's own tears, which had been dryin' up, started anew, but she wiped them away. "I won't. I promise."

Michonne smiled again, and I was reminded of that famous paintin' by that inventor guy. Her smile hid a million of her facets, and we would never see most of 'em. It gave her an all-knowin' air.

Tara, one of the new faces, asked, "That's neat. Where did you get it?" She pointed at Beth's necklace.

Beth grinned. "Daryl made it for me. He said he regretted that he couldn't give me diamonds, but that this necklace was from his heart. Isn't that sweetest thing you ever heard?"

Tara smiled. "Yeah. That's pretty epic."

"That's so sweet, it's sickening." Michonne grinned, winkin' at me. I stuck my tongue out at her, daring her to come over and say that to my face, and Beth just kept smilin'.

Rick came back into the room then, leaning close so that only I could hear what he had to say.

"Carol wants to leave. I couldn't talk her out of it. She says she'll only talk to you."

I made a face. I really wasn't in the mood for Carol right now; thin's still hadn't been resolved with Maggie. But now that ever'one else was on our side, maybe it would be easier to talk sense into both of 'em. I sighed.

"Where is she?"

Rick's face looked uncomfortable. "She's in your bedroom."

I frowned. _Was that so? _This day just kept gettin' stranger and stranger.

I pecked Beth's temple and lightly patted her ass. "I'll be back."

She smiled. "Okay." She squeezed my fingers and then let my hand go.

I nodded to Rick and he nodded back, and I left the room. Runnin' my hand through my hair, I stopped in front of our bedroom door and took a deep breath. I had a feelin' this wasn't gonna go well.

I reached for the knob, but stopped when Maggie came out of the bathroom, glared at me, then brushed past quickly, not sayin' a word. I rolled my eyes. _Stubborn damn woman_.

I turned the knob and walked in. "Carol? Where ya at?"

I heard a noise to my right, and when I turned to look, the last thin' I remember seein' was Carol's face, her teeth bared like a string of dull pearls, swinging the lamp at my head.

* * *

><p>The shakin' and shoutin' woke me. My head ached like a bitch.<p>

_I'm gettin' real sick of bein' hit on the head_, I thought blearily. I groaned, and tried to sit up. I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. Rick's face swam before my eyes, and Beth's. Rick pushed me back down.

Beth was cryin'. "Daryl, are you alright? You're bleeding everywhere."

I grunted, reaching for the back of my head and touchin' with my fingers the sticky blood that oozed from my scalp. "I'm fine, I think. Head hurts. My shoulder, too."

Rick pulled me up slowly so he could have a look, and I felt him slip his fingers under my collar, searchin'. When he touched it, I winced.

Laying me back down, I searched his eyes. He stared back, open. And nodded slightly.

_Goddamn it. The bitch had stabbed me._

Beth's eyes danced from me to Rick, anxious. Rick raised his brows, askin', so I said, "I'm alright, Bethy. Don't worry 'bout me." To Rick I said, "Where is she?"

He held my gaze. "She left, and didn't close the hatch, either. And unless you got another quicklink, all we can do for security is tie it shut."

I curled my lip. _Well, I'd been meanin' to go huntin'_. Now I had an undebatable reason.

To Beth I said, "Darlin', will ya rustle me up a couple painkillers? My head's achin' somethin' fierce."

She nodded and got up. "I'll be right back."

I knew it wouldn't take her long so I turned to Rick. "Feel like doin' some huntin', Sheriff?"

Without hesitation he nodded. "I knew you were unhappy 'bout what I did, Daryl, but Carol ain't the same. I dunno what happened to her, or when, but that woman's taken a walk off the map. She's a threat." He nodded at my pocket. "She left ya a note. I stuffed it in there so Beth wouldn't see."

I frowned. "Agreed, she's a damn big threat. If she'll do this to me, she'll likely do worse to Beth if'n she ever gets her hands on her."

Beth came back, carryin' a glass of water. "What're you guys talking about?"

We exchanged a glance that tacitly agreed to tell Beth as little as possible.

"Nothin', darlin'. Thanks." I took the pills and threw them back, chasin' them with the water. I handed her back the glass. "Rick says he'll help me clean my head up if you wanna settle ever'one in here, let 'em know ever'thin's alright. Ya know, _me casa, soo casa_? Will ya do that?"

She nodded. "Sure. Guys?"

Standing, we both looked back at her.

"What are you going to do about Carol?" Her tone was low, neutral. I couldn't tell what she wanted to hear.

Rick said smoothly, "We don't know yet, Beth. But we'll figure somethin' out."

Beth nodded slowly. "Okay." She reached for my hand and squeezed it. I brought her knuckles to my lips and kissed 'em.

"Try to make up with Maggie, darlin'. Glenn's got your back. 'Tween the two of ya's, ya should be able to make her see reason."

She smiled. "I'll try." Her eyes seemed to age in an instant. "You're going after her, aren't you." It wasn't a question. I sighed, and cupped her cheek in my palm.

"I can't have her here, threatenin' ya."

"I know... I understand. What should I tell the others?"

If Rick was surprised by Beth's quick consent, he didn't show it. He replied, "Tell them we're goin' huntin'."

She nodded, kissed my palm, and left us. I watched her go, then Rick followed me to the bathroom. Motionin' for me to sit on the toilet seat, he opened the cupboard lookin' for the antiseptic and some bandages where I said they'd be, while I carefully peeled off my blood-soaked shirt. Thank God it was a dark colour and Beth hadn't noticed the huge patch of blood stainin' the back of it.

While he wiped blood off my neck and back, I pulled Carol's note outta my pocket. It was short and to the point.

**Beth's next.**

I ripped it up, gettin' up to lift the lid beneath me then flush it down. _Why couldn't Beth and I be together without some crazy, psychotic lunatic tryin' to keep us apart?!_ This pattern was startin' to get frustrating, but I refused to see it as a sign that we shouldn't be together. I loved Beth, and I would protect her with my life. I'd also do ever'thin' in my power to take out the threat, even kill my best female friend. I didn't _want _to kill Carol, but she left me no choice. If there was one thin' I'd done right in my life, it was never leavin' unfinished business unfinished. Somethin' needed killin', I killed it.

"Yep... She stuck you good." I winced as Rick sterilised my wounds. Hissin' through my teeth as he slapped my other shoulder. "It's probably a good three inches deep. It'll need stitches-"

"Later." I interrupted. "Beth'll do that later. The paper stitches'll do for now. We can't take our time with this."

He didn't say anythin' or move for a whole minute. Likely givin' me a chance to change my mind, but it was set. Carol was goin' down.

He dried the wound, applied the sticky paper stitches to keep the wound closed, and plastered on a bandage to cover it all up. While he was workin', I asked him, "Why the hell's she doin' this, Rick?"

I heard Rick shrug rather than saw it. "I dunno, Daryl. I don't try to understand women anymore - gives me a headache. I mean, my wife pitted me against my best friend, forcing me to kill him... Fuck, she practically _begged _me to kill him... And then she gets all offended and hurt when I do what she asks. Couldn't understand why I wouldn't talk to her anymore. I'd lost all respect for her after that." He looked at the floor. "I was messed up after she died because I didn't put my own hurt aside, Daryl. I should've made up with her, for Carl's sake. But he saw it, too. He saw his mother pit the two men in her life against each other, and he couldn't respect her, not anymore. Thank God he and Michonne are so close. For a while there I feared what his attitude toward women would turn out to be."

I looked at my hands. Hands that were permanently dirty, that would never come clean, no matter how much I washed them. My eyes narrowed. That was a man's burden: his hands'd _never _be clean. They started off that way, but as time passed, the dirt just kept comin'. Sins were the same. The dirt on my hands could represent the sins I'd committed, sins that would follow me my whole life. And I was about to add one more to the collection.

Turnin' to look at Rick, I noted his hands were stained, too. The nails were black with grime or old blood; it didn't matter which. They'd never be clean again. But maybe, someday, we could stop makin' 'em blacker.

"Carl's a good kid. He's got you."

Rick smiled a little. "Yeah... He and Judith, and our family... They're all that matter to me now. It's situations like this," he sniffed, "Where the lines are blurred, that make me edgy. Carol's one of us. Well, _was_. Her attack on you is intolerable. I don't care what she says. What she did to those two people..." He shook his head. "Somethin' went wrong somewhere along the line, Daryl, and we didn't see it. I still don't know what it was, but I know it's there, and I know I don't want it anywhere near our family."

I nodded. "I thought I knew 'er so well, ya know? We was two peas in a pod, Carol and me. Ever since Sophia, we'd been there for each other. Once, I caught her talkin' to Merle, 'fore he died. I heard her tell him not to underestimate her. I'm thinkin' that's what I've done."

Rick said, "She saved us from Terminus single-handed, with an assault rifle and camouflage. I owe her my life for that... Which is why this is a real grey area for me. I kicked her out, but she saved my life, only to turn around and threaten yours. I don't like the thought of huntin' down a woman for the specific purpose of killin' her, but since it comes down to a choice between you or her... I'll pick you every time, Daryl. She may have saved me... But you're my _brother_."

I met his eyes, touched more'n I could ever say. _Rick thought of me as a brother? Me?_ I felt tears threaten but I didn't allow them to fall. Instead I nodded, and held out my hand, and we locked fists.

"Brothers."

He smiled. "Brothers."

Lettin' his hand go, I stood. "C'mon, we're wastin' daylight. I wanna get this over with 'fore it's too dark to track 'er." I threw my shirt in the tub, plugged it, and ran some cold water over it, then we left it to soak while I quickly grabbed another before my more serious wound could be seen.

While I pulled a t-shirt over my head Rick casually remarked, "You know, I gotta say that her actions strike me as somethin' a jealous wife might do. Used to see this a lot, back in the day, though usually it was a man doin' the woundin', not a woman, although I've seen that a time or two."

I turned to face him. "Ya think she's jealous of Beth?"

He replied, "You don't?"

I frowned. "She wasn't never jealous of 'er before."

He smiled. "You weren't in love with her then, either."

I chewed my lip, then looked him in the eye, pointin' my finger at him. "Ya know... I'm gettin' real sick of this shit. I ain't been with a woman in years, and now that I am, ever'one's losin' their fuckin' minds. If Carol was in love with me, why didn't she ever say somethin'? Jesus Christ."

Rick shrugged. "Maybe she didn't want to scare you off."

I snorted. "She was always flirtin' one way or another. Couldn't have a serious conversation with that woman, some days."

He raised a brow. "Didn't that ever tip you off?"

Now I shrugged. "Not really. I weren't lookin' for a woman then. I never was. Beth and I just sorta... Happened, ya know? I was mean to 'er, Rick. Real mean. She gave it right back. She didn't back down, or walk away. She made me face my demons. No woman's ever done that for me before."

He grinned. "Sounds like a keeper to me."

I smiled back. "She ain't never anythin' but honest. I respect her for that." My eyes slid over his shoulder. "I can't respect a woman who tries to kill just 'cause somethin' don't go her way."

Rick tilted his head. "Neither can I. Let's do this thing."

I nodded, followin' him out of the bedroom and down the hall.

* * *

><p>I located where Beth had stashed my pack and crossbow 'fore we left. Pullin' it on aggravated my stab wound, but I ignored the pain as best I could. I'd worry 'bout it later.<p>

Handing Rick some food to carry after I strapped on my knife, we made our way back to the hatch. When we turned the corner and I saw who was waitin', arms stubbornly crossed, blockin' our way out, I wanted to groan out loud. Rick rolled his eyes and shook his head.

As we approached her Rick asked, "Shouldn't you be makin' up with your sister?"

Maggie narrowed her eyes. "That can wait. I'm not lettin' you two hunt Carol down just because she broke a lamp over Dixon's head." She looked at me contemptuously. "Probably deserved it, anyway."

That was it. I'd _had it _with this woman, she'd stepped on my last nerve and now I was _pissed_. I dropped my pack on the floor and got right in her face. We'd been nose to nose before, but I could count the hairs in her eyebrows now, we were so close. My forehead touched hers. She never moved an inch.

"I've had enough of your harpin', woman. We're leavin' and you're gonna let us, 'cause we got a job to do and no one, not you or anyone else, is gonna keep us from it, ya hear me? Ya just step aside and concentrate on your business, which is makin' up with your little sister, 'cause she needs ya in her life, even if ya are a stubborn damn fool, sometimes. She ain't got no family left but you, Maggie. Try to remember that."

I moved to pick up my pack again, finished with her, but her hand shot out and grabbed a handful of my t-shirt, makin' me pause.

"I'll make up with Beth, Daryl, but only because I don't want to upset her so much she loses the baby. I still don't approve of what you've done to her. But this is something else entirely, what you two are doing. And Rick, I'm a little surprised you're going along with this. Cold-blooded murder? For what? A bump on the head? I mean, she saved us. This's a little extreme, don't you-"

"She's threatened Beth, Maggie." I glared at her hotly. "She bashed me on the head and stabbed me in the back of my shoulder, and left me a note sayin' Beth was next. She wants to kill 'er."

Maggie's mouth fell open, her eyes widening in shock.

"Gonna stand in our way now?"

Slowly she shook her head, hand over her mouth. "Oh my God." She looked at Rick, and he nodded. "It's true."

I hefted the pack, makin' a face as a shot of pain streaked through my lung. I pointed my finger in her face. "And don't ya dare tell Beth I'm wounded, neither. She don't need the stress, ya hear me?"

Maggie lowered her hand. "Yes, I understand. You shouldn't even be going, if you're wounded."

I raised my brows. "If I don't take care of my problem, who will? We didn't take care of the Governor." I glanced at Rick, and his eyes dropped to the floor. I was an asshole to bring that up, but it was the best comparison I had. "Remember how that turned out?"

"... Yeah." Shoulders drooping, Maggie moved aside as we ascended the ladder, Rick first, then me. I looked down at Maggie from the top.

"Here." I dropped a roll of thin cable to her. "Tie off the hatch after we're out, and only open it for us, no one else, got that? Ya open it for Carol and I'll tan your fuckin' hide, Maggie. Ya let her in here and put Bethy in danger just to spite me, I'll wring your fuckin' neck. That's a promise."

Maggie raised a brow. "I promise I won't let her in, Daryl. I love my sister, too, you know."

I mumbled loud enough for her to hear, "You'd never know it from her angle." Climbed out of the hole.

Maggie's voice was mildly indignant when she hissed, "I heard that, Dixon."

I grinned at her. "Ya were meant to. Don't disappoint me, woman." I slammed the hatch shut.

Rick was lookin' away over a fence, a smile on his face. "I think she's warmin' up to you."

I snorted. "Sure she is. And my balls're made of solid gold."

He started laughin', and I smiled, too. It was good to hear Rick laugh. I hadn't seen him laugh in a long time. It made the years fall away from him, and instead of lookin' fifty, he could've been thirty again.

Slappin' my good shoulder, he wiped his nose with his other hand, his face sobering. "Which way, Mantracker?"

I dropped my gaze to the ground, notin' that the impressions of many feet surrounded the hatch, but that was to be expected; there were several people inside, now. I was lookin' for Carol's, though, and her boots had a unique tread, one I had memorised almost immediately after meetin' her. I'd never told anyone I recognised their trail by their boot tread. I just filed that info away in case I ever had to find someone, or, in this particular case, hunt 'em down. Sweepin' my eyes all around us, I finally spotted her prints headin' west through the muck of leaves, mud, and chewed up grass.

Pointing with my bow, I said, "That way."

Rick fell in behind me as we followed her trail, his Python clutched loosely in his hand. We were silent for a while as I concentrated, but after a while, as we were headin' into the surrounding bush behind the cul-de-sac, Rick asked, "So what's it like to date a younger woman?"

I chuckled. "It's alright. I gotta admit, when it happened, I was probably more surprised'n she was."

"Why?"

"Well, to be honest, it didn't take long at all for me to start feelin', well, _somethin_' 'tween us. We'd have these real stilted conversations, ya know, the ones where the woman talks nonstop and we just listen? It was like that, at first. She'd blather on and on 'bout basically nothin', and at the time, it annoyed the fuck outta me, but I never stopped her from doin' it. I guess I knew she needed to work through Hershel's death, even if'n it was at the expense of my own peace of mind. Then..." I'd dreaded this since before I knew we'd meet up with the group again, and my heart skipped a beat before I kept on, even though ever'one already knew, now. They just didn't know the entire story, nor did they need to. I only told Rick now 'cause I trusted his discretion implicitly.

"Then?"

I sighed. "Then I lost her. I chased that car all night. Never did catch up. Got to that crossroad, sat down, and... Fuckin' cried, man." I sniffed. "Sat there til Joe's group come along and snatched me up. They were lookin' for some guy who'd killed their buddy, Lou, and it wasn't til that night that I overheard Len and Tony, I think it was, talkin' 'bout some woman they'd used for fun. That kinda shit was what made me leave 'em in the middle of the night. Thank God Beth found me then, Rick, 'cause if they'd seen her there, outside their fence... She'd'a never lasted the week."

He replied, "I know, Daryl. I... I think they were lookin' for me."

I frowned. "You? What'd you do to 'em? They never mentioned your name."

He shook his head. "I was in a house with Carl and Michonne. I was still pretty beat up, so I stayed behind to rest while they scavenged the neighbourhood. I fell asleep in one of the beds upstairs, and men's voices woke me. I hid under the bed like a fuckin' coward when one came upstairs, lookin' around. Another followed him up, and they fought over who'd get the bed. One got knocked to the floor, but the other guy strangled him til he passed out before he could sound the alarm on me. Daryl, we stared into each other's eyes for almost a minute 'fore he finally passed out. When the other feller fell asleep, I crawled out and hid in the bathroom, thinkin' maybe I could climb out a window and warn Michonne and Carl away before they returned." His eyes fell, but they met mine again quickly.

"There was someone in there, and, Daryl... I panicked." He held out his hands, waving the pistol around. "I strangled the bastard to death. I was afraid that if I let him make any noise they'd all come down on my head, and, well, it was him or me. I had Carl and Michonne to think of. I couldn't let them get their hands on them. _I couldn't_."

I stopped trackin' and faced him. "I know, Rick. I been there, too."

Rick's face, etched with age lines, was calmer than I'd thought it would be.

"I was scared, Daryl, but killin' him felt _good_. I've killed to protect before, but that time... I did it for me. I was just... so sick of bein' the victim, you know? Losing Hershel, and your brother... Almost losing Michonne, to that _fucking Governor_-"

I wrapped my arm 'round his shoulder, swattin' his back a couple times in a manly hug, then I backed off, chewin' my lip.

"I get it, Rick. The others... They don't. But they will. Someday they'll hafta do the same, and they'll know. Deep in your chest, in your core... Ya don't kill just to protect. Sometimes... Sometimes ya do it to stay sane."

He looked at me, his eyes clearing of the guilt I could see gatherin' there. "Yeah," he whispered. I nodded. He nodded back.

"Come on, Sheriff. Let's keep goin'."

He followed me without another word, but I knew his mind was workin' a mile a minute. I wondered for a moment if Shane, had he lived to make better choices, would've approved of how Rick had evolved? I shook my head. Shane had been on a path bent on destruction. He'd _wanted _to die. And he'd wanted his "best" friend to have to live with the guilt of killin' him. I smiled to myself.

Good thin' Rick'd had the fortitude to be up to that task. Shane would've just alienated ever'one, eventually. It was Rick who was the true leader, and always had been.

I snorted. Shane was a shitty-ass friend. He'd never've made a _real _brother.

"His name was Tony."

I looked over my shoulder. "Huh?"

Rick looked up from watchin' his step. "The man called him Tony, from downstairs. Called Len, too. I heard someone shout for a Joe after I'd gotten out and was waitin' for the coast to be clear. They were lookin' for me, and went after you."

I tilted my head. "Rick-"

He shook his head and cut me off. "No. I should've killed them all when I had the chance. Like I should've gone back and killed those fuckers at Terminus. That's how we lost Bob." His left hand slowly stroked the handle of the machete that hung on his hip.

I frowned again. "Rick, you're human. Ya make mistakes. We all do. It's alright-"

"It's _not _fucking alright, Daryl! Not when you keep makin' _the same fuckin' mistake_!"

We both turned when a branch snapped, the area 'round us fallin' silent in its wake. I palmed my knife as a lone walker stumbled outta the trees, his ragged clothes barely hangin' on to his rotten skeleton. Thin' was as skinny as a steel rod.

Rick, his lips peelin' back from his teeth in a feral growl, lunged at it, clubbing it on the head with the butt of the Python. The walker went down in a heap, black blood oozin' from its crushed skull.

Panting, Rick stared at me. I stared back, unsure what to say, so I said nothin'.

After a few moments, his breathing slower, he ran his hand through his hair and started walkin' again. I did too, and soon a comfortable silence fell 'tween us. What I wouldn't've given to have this in Beth's and my early days. _Silence is golden..._

A few minutes later somethin' shiny caught my eye. Bending down, the weight of the pack shifted over my stab wound, and I felt one of the little paper stitches rip, followed by a gush of warmth. _Fuck_.

Rick came back, realisin' I'd stopped, and crouching, asked, "What ya got there?"

I flicked off some leaves and mud, and dug my fingers under the metal object. Prying it up, it popped out of the earth and bounced off the underside of my knee.

"Huh."

Wiping it off, I turned the spoon over. It was tarnished as shit, but it was old - real old, by the looks of it. Antique old. The scrollwork was delicate, and full to the brim with dirt, but it was a fancy-lookin' thin', even covered in mud. An idea popped into my head.

"A spoon. Congratulations, you can eat soup now."

I smiled and bumped Rick's shoulder with mine. "Shut up. Ain't no ordinary spoon." I waved it in front of his face. "It's an old spoon. A senior citizen. A little respect, son."

He laughed, shakin' his head. "What're you gonna do with it?"

I looked away into the drab greys and browns 'round us. One bright red leaf stood out among the rest, and my smile widened. "That, my friend, is none of your goddamn business."

He grinned at me, raisin' a brow and tiltin' his head. "Ah."

I raised my brow back, slipping my prize into my pocket and sayin' nothin' as he watched me. I knew what he was thinkin', and he was right. But I weren't gonna tell him that - unless it became necessary and I had to. But until then... Mum was the word.

We stood up again, and I took the lead. A tickle formed in my throat, and I coughed, as quietly as I could, into my shoulder. The air was gettin' nippy, and I wished I'd thrown on more than just my jacket 'fore we left, but I'd hoped to be caught up to her by now. Looked like we were gonna hafta camp out here tonight.

When I finally stopped coughing, I yakked up a wad of phlegm, spat it out. It was bright red.

Rick asked, "You gonna live?"

I nodded, though my eyes followed the ball of goo all the way to the ground, where it spattered away. Time was runnin' out.

"Yeah. M'fine."

* * *

><p>After dark, Rick built a small fire. As we waited for the squirrels I'd killed to finish cookin', I returned from a nearby creek, my rag wet, and I sat down with my back to a tree, pullin' the spoon out of my pocket. I used the rag to clean it, and when I was satisfied that it was, I held it handle-end into the fire.<p>

Rick watched what I was doin', but he never said a word. When the handle was hot enough, I pulled it out, wrapped my damp rag 'round it twice, ignorin' the steam, and bent the soft metal 'round my pinky finger. It was burning me, but I gritted my teeth and blew on it to cool it.

About a minute later, I pulled it off and unwrapped it. The fancy handle was almost perfectly round now. Using my knife, I sawed a groove into both sides of the handle below the bowl, then bent it back and forth til it broke off.

Rick smiled when he saw what I'd made. Pryin' up a rock near my foot, I started rubbin' the snapped end against it til it was smooth, spitting on it several times to keep it from gettin' too hot.

My spit tasted like blood.

Finally, 'bout an hour later, the end was smooth, and I polished the ring til it shone. In the firelight, it caught the bright orange of the flames and sparkled. I put it in my pants pocket.

My next breath rattled, and I had another coughin' fit. I thanked God it was dark and Rick couldn't tell that my spit was red with blood when I hocked a loogie three feet away.

"You alright, Daryl? Want me to check that wound?"

I shook my head. The wound ached, and I was pretty sure that another of the paper stitches had ripped when I'd brought my bow up too fast after a false walker alarm, but the last thin' I needed was for him to start worryin' more about me than our quarry; we had a job to do, and I wasn't goin' home til it was done.

I rolled my tired eyes up to meet his. "Nah, s'fine."

"You sure?" The concern in his eyes was genuine. It made my chest ache.

"If I'm lyin', I'm dyin'." I smiled. _I'm doin' both_.

He smiled back. "Alright, then." I held his gaze for thirty seconds; I knew he knew I was hurtin' more than I was lettin' on, but he didn't know just how serious the damage was gettin'. I looked away.

Leaning my head back against the tree, I accepted the squirrel Rick handed me and ate it quickly. Then I promptly fell asleep.

* * *

><p>When I opened my eyes again it was daylight; bright daylight, much later than I'd expected to sleep. I wondered why Rick hadn't woken me.<p>

Lookin' 'round, I couldn't see Rick anywhere. I frowned; somethin' didn't feel right, here. Somethin' trickled down my chin.

Wiping my mouth with my fingers, they came away red. I quickly wiped my bloody drool off my face with my collar and tried to stand up. It was harder'n it'd ever been.

When I finally gained my feet I was panting. My breaths sounded wet. I heard footsteps, and I turned, expectin' to see Rick, but what I saw made my gut feel like it fell out my ass.

Carol approached me, a smile on her face, Rick's red-handled machete blade restin' on her shoulder. Rick walked behind her, his arms tied behind him and his mouth gagged. He looked 'bout as happy as a pissed-on rattler. She tugged him along with a length of rope.

"Morning, Pookie."

I swallowed. _How the fuck'd she manage to capture Rick?!_

Slowing, she walked back behind Rick and demanded, "Keep walking, Rick." He refused to move. She kicked the back of his thigh - hard. His leg nearly gave out and and he grunted, stumbling, but he started walkin' again.

Carol allowed him to walk until he was about five feet from me, then she yanked harshly on his rope to halt him. It pulled his bound arms back awkwardly, and he grunted again, this time tears runnin' from one of his eyes in pain. I could see that his wrists were already chafed and bloody. I sympathised; I knew how that felt.

"That's far enough there, Sheriff. Surprised to see me?" She walked up to me, pointin' Rick's gun in my face as I slowly lifted my palms and she divested me of my knife.

I shrugged. "Not really. I been lookin' for you, actually."

"Have you now? Well, I'm glad to hear that. I've been waiting for you." She leaned in and kissed my mouth, quickly. Then she rested the barrel of the Python against my temple. "Sit."

I sat, my hands still raised. She slipped my knife into her belt, next to her own, and bent over to jam the machete blade-down into the ground. Her eyes never leavin' either of us, she pointed the gun at Rick, backed him up to a tree, then wound the rope 'round him several times, tying it off behind him 'round the other side of the tree where he couldn't reach the knot.

She came back then and sat down across from me, her legs bent, ladylike, her hands restin' on her knees. The machete was not a foot away from her side, too far from me to get to it first.

"I'll get right to the point, Daryl. You and Beth, together - that doesn't sit well with me."

I raised my brow.

"Beth pregnant, with your child... That _really _pisses me off." She pulled out my knife and began to clean her nails with it.

I snorted. "Is that all?"

She glanced up at me. "You know, even for a man, you're pretty dense, Dixon. Don't you get it?"

I shrugged. "Obviously I ain't. Why don't ya spell it out for me."

She let the knife sag in her hand. My eyes darted around, lookin' for somethin', _anythin'_, to use as a weapon. I could feel blood flowing in a slow stream down my back. My shirt was cool where it was soaked through.

Carol stared at me. "I love you, Daryl."

I rolled my eyes back to hers. I was gettin' tired again, sluggish. My eyes didn't want to stay open anymore. "Sure got a funny fuckin' way of showin' it."

She blinked. "You mean the note? That was just a way to get you to follow me. Worked, didn't it? I needed to speak to you, away from her. To make you see that what you two have isn't real, Daryl. You've just been alone too long, but really, Maggie's right. She's way too young for you. Although, I guess the damage is done now, isn't it?"

Her assumption that what Beth and I had was wrong got my blood goin' again. Anger burned in my gut. Suddenly, I reached 'round with my left hand and dug my fingers viciously into my wound, yellin' loudly. Carol jumped, and so did Rick.

I slapped it a few times, the pain energising my tired mind. My hand was red and sticky when I rested it on my knee again.

"Ya stab ever'one ya love, Carol? I thought ya were more of a cold-blooded, murderin' arsonist, myself." I wiped my blood on my pantleg. "The fuck's wrong with ya, woman?! Somethin' don't go your way, so ya stab it? Bet that'll get ya results!"

I spat on the ground. All three of us saw how bright red it was. I wiped my mouth. "I'm hurtin', Carol. I'm hurtin' real bad. Ya happy now?" Under my breath I muttered, "Sadistic bitch."

Carol blinked, her mouth open a little. I laughed, wetly.

"What? Betcha didn't think ya stabbed me that deep, did ya? But a bump on the noggin wasn't good enough. Tell me, Carol - how many of us hafta suffer before your fuckin' tantrum's over?"

Her eyes narrowed. "I'm not throwing a tantrum, Daryl. I panicked, okay? You made me so mad, I just... I just... I snapped! And I'm sick of being harped for Karen and David! I did it, okay? I admitted that to him-" She pointed at Rick, "-And he _still _kicked me out! I'm not perfect, okay? They got sick, and nobody could see, nobody _realised_, the powder keg they were! They made almost all of us sick! We should have killed them sooner, but no one wanted to do that, no one wanted to man up and take care of the problem, so I did! _I took care of it_!"

Tears of anger were runnin' down her face by now, but I didn't care. Her rant wasn't gonna make me feel sorry for her, neither.

"And people still died! Ya didn't stop it, Carol. Ya didn't save nobody. All ya did was take a convenient opportunity to murder two people - who could've recovered - and then stood there actin' innocent while Tyreese tried to kick the shit outta me and Rick. Ya ever think that maybe he'd react badly to the sight of his girlfriend burned to a fuckin' crisp!?" I balled my fists. "For Christ's sake, Carol! What the fuck were ya thinkin'?!"

She sniffled, her face red and blotchy. She'd clamped her fist 'round my knife, and waved it 'round as she spoke. "I wanted to save everyone! That was all I wanted!" She started to sob. "I didn't want to kill them, I was sorry, I hated having to do it - and the girls... Christ." She covered her face with her hands.

I raised a brow. "Where _are _the girls, Carol?"

It was a few moments before she answered.

"Lizzie wasn't dealing well with the walkers... She said we didn't understand that they were just different. I should have seen it coming... Mika was so innocent, Daryl, so innocent. But she understood. She knew walkers weren't people, not anymore. She could kill them, but when it came to bad people... She was weak. Lizzie knew that, and used it against her. Tyreese and I, we went to get water..."

I waited.

"We found Lizzie, her hands covered in blood. She'd murdered her own sister, just to prove a point. She was going to kill Judith, too... But we talked her out of it. She killed her, Daryl. Just like that. There was no remorse, just... Acceptance. "Mika will come back," she said. "You'll see.""

I curled my lip. "Sounds familiar."

Carol glared at me. "I _had _to put her down, Daryl. That was the hardest thing I've _ever _had to do! I hated it! I did it because I had to, not because I wanted to. I've never _wanted _to kill anyone, Daryl. Lizzie was a danger to Judith. I couldn't chance her, not after Mika. So don't you _dare _judge me. I did what was right, I did, and it kills me every day!" She wiped her nose. "If you had killed Karen and David, everyone would've probably sung your goddamn praises."

I laughed a little. "I wouldn't have killed them, period."

She snapped, "And that's the difference between you and me. You don't think for yourself! That's why you were never the leader. _Rick _never asks anyone when he kills! I saw what needed to be done and I manned up and fucking did it!"

I crossed my arms over my chest, concealing the rock I'd palmed while she was ranting. "Lemme get this straight. You tellin' me I ain't a man 'cause I don't kill indiscriminately? Rick only kills for our protection. _Your _protection. As do I. I don't _like _killin', Carol. That don't make me any less of a man." I leaned forward. "I looked for Sophia for _days_. I took a bullet and an arrow, and _she weren't even mine_! I did that for _you_! Don't you sit here and tell me I ain't a man, Carol. Don't feed me bullshit and tell me it's apple-fuckin'-pie. Most of all, don't fuckin' threaten to hurt Beth 'cause ya "love me" all of a sudden!"

Carol glared, grippin' my knife, but I didn't stop.

"Hell, if ya loved me so much, why not just tell me? Oh, wait, I'll tell ya why. See, ya didn't _know _ya loved me til ya saw me with Beth. Til ya saw I was happy. Ya got jealous, didn't ya? Ya did." I sneered at her. "Ya knew I didn't love ya then, didn't ya?"

"I hate you." Her tears flowed freely, her eyes slits.

I laughed. "No, ya don't! Ya fuckin' _love _me, remember? That's why we're here, ain't it? So ya can confess your love!"

I stood up, my arms out, lookin' at the sky. "She loves me, God, whatta ya think 'bout that?! She loves me so much, she wants to hurt the only person who matters to me."

I looked down at her. "Ya know Carol, if ya _really _loved me... Ya'd let me go."

She blinked. "... What?"

"Ya heard me. If ya really love me, let go. Leave. Go make a life for yourself somewhere else. 'Cause I'll _never _love you."

I glanced at Rick. His eyes looked at me as if I were crazy, to provoke she who holds the pointy knife, but at this point I was beyond bein' worried 'bout that. I was already wounded. I was pushin' her so she'd get angry, and come at me. I was sure she'd seen the rock in my hand, but she didn't seem to take any notice of it. That was what I wanted.

For almost a whole minute we stared at each other, her eyes hatin' me, mine leerin' at her, at her foolishness. Finally the moment I'd been waitin' for came, but only after just a little more prompting.

I dug my fingers into my wound again and flung blood at her face. Little droplets landed all over her. "Here. A little somethin' to remember me by." I leaned over. "It's all your ever gonna get, sweetheart."

Teeth bared, a scream loud enough to bust ear drums, she lunged up at me, my knife held high in her fist, the blade catchin' the sun.

Thin's seemed to slow down for me. I could feel my wound throb with every beat of my poundin' heart. Blood flowed sluggishly through my veins, despite my heart's fervent effort to move it. Carol's teeth caught the light, shinin' like polished chicklets, dull white. Her dirty skin pulled back in a grimace, her anger makin' her appear feral as she flew slowly toward me. I saw her bring the knife down toward my heart, but she didn't see my hand swingin' up to connect with her jaw, throwing ever'thin' off kilter, makin' the blade miss my chest by mere inches, grazing my shoulder instead. Blood spurted from her mouth, into my eyes. My own blood flowed hotly from the knick she'd given me.

Outta the corner of my eye, I saw Rick start to struggle against his bonds in earnest, tryin' to get free. He'd seen the blood down my back, I'd bet. The blood that had now soaked a stain all the way down to the back of my knee. So much for the paper stitches.

Suddenly ever'thin' was still. My hand still gripped the bloody rock, and Carol was on the ground, her hand holdin' her broken jaw. I looked at Rick.

He stopped struggling, and even though his gag was still tied tight, he smiled at me, and nodded. I smiled back. Then his face changed. I frowned, watchin' curiously as his eyes dropped to my feet. His eyes grew impossibly wide.

I felt the pain before I saw what she was doin'. I screamed as white-hot fire shot through my thigh, and I stumbled, falling on my side, grippin' the wound.

Carol pulled out my knife, and I looked at her. She smiled, her broken teeth as red as paint in her mouth.

She crawled over me, my knife still gripped in her hand, until she was layin' on my chest, right in my face, pressing my screamin' back into the ground.

"I did love you, Daryl Dixon, but since you're going to be such an asshole, I've decided that instead of using Beth to hurt you, I'll just kill you, and hurt her. How's that for a plan?"

She lifted the knife over my face, above our heads. I started to struggle, weakly.

I panted, "Fuck you, ya crazy goddamn bitch!"

She grinned, spitting blood in my face. "Go to hell, Di-"

* * *

><p>Her face froze, and a mist of blood hit my face again. Her expression then fell slack, blood trickling from the corner of her mouth. Her body relaxed, her chin comin' to rest on my chest, slowly lolling to the side. Her body was still.<p>

I looked up.

Michonne screwed up her face, baring her teeth a bit, usin' her foot to pull her sword outta Carol's head.

I felt my neck grow warm and slick from the gush of blood that flowed from the death blow. I tried to push Carol's body off me, but couldn't. Michonne grabbed her arm and quickly dragged her clear.

She crouched down by my head, and soon Rick joined her, lookin' down at me. My vision began to spin, and blackness closed in, their voices comin' from far away. I pulled the spoon ring outta my pocket and tried to hold my arm out in Rick's general direction. My hand fell open, the ring rollin' out.

"Give 'er this," I slurred. "'Case I... don'make't."

Michonne's mouth moved, but I couldn't hear her. My eyes were heavy as freeway dividers, felt like.

"Tell 'er... I loved 'er."

The blackness closed in.

* * *

><p>Blindin' pain.<p>

"Is he gonna make it?!" Worried. My Beth's voice. The most beautiful sound in the world.

"I dunno. He's lost a lot of blood." Rick. Their voices echoed.

"What happened to him?" Sasha.

"Gimme his legs."

"Did you find her?"

"Yeah. Just in time, too. Poor thing was losing the fight."

"She got the drop on me at the creek... None of this would've happened if I hadn't-"

"We'll do the best we can, Rick."

"He... He wanted ya to have this. In case he didn't make it. He said to tell ya that... That he loved ya."

Black again.

* * *

><p>"Jesus. Look at you." A chair scrapin'. "What a mess. You got nine lives, Dixon, you know that?"<p>

A sigh.

"I won't say I'm sorry she's dead... Though, loving you would drive _any _woman around the bend."

Silence.

"Well. Time for the next shift. See ya later, honey."

* * *

><p>A door closes.<p>

Steps on the floor.

Weight on the mattress.

"God, Daryl."

Another sigh. A long silence. A whisper.

"If I hadn't turned my back..."

A door closes.

* * *

><p>Hours pass.<p>

* * *

><p>Lavender.<p>

The scent fills the space, followed by a soft weight and soft fingers.

"I'm sorry, Daryl. I'm sorry I gave you such a hard time. I know, now. I'll never doubt you again."

Lavender fades.

* * *

><p>"Please don't die, Daryl." A soft voice.<p>

_Finally_.

A song, low and throaty. Familiar words. Familiar warmth.

_I've been waitin' for this warmth for so long_.

"_They hung a sign up in our town: "If you live it up, you won't_  
><em> live it down"<em>  
><em> So, she left Monte Rio, son<em>  
><em> Just like a bullet leaves a gun<em>  
><em> With charcoal eyes and Monroe hips<em>  
><em> She went and took that California trip<em>  
><em> Well, the moon was gold, her<em>  
><em> Hair like wind<em>  
><em> She said don't look back just<em>  
><em> Come on Jim<em>

_ Oh you got to_  
><em> Hold on, Hold on<em>  
><em> You got to hold on<em>  
><em> Take my hand, I'm standing right here<em>  
><em> You gotta hold on<em>

_ Well, he gave her a dimestore watch_  
><em> And a ring made from a spoon<em>  
><em> Everyone's looking for someone to blame<em>  
><em> But you share my bed, you share my name<em>  
><em> Well, go ahead and call the cops<em>  
><em> You don't meet nice girls in coffee shops<em>  
><em> She said baby, I still love you<em>  
><em> Sometimes there's nothin' left to do<em>

_ Oh you got to_  
><em> Hold on, hold on<em>  
><em> You got to hold on<em>  
><em> Take my hand, I'm standing right here, you got to<em>  
><em> Just hold on-<em>"

Something warm fell on my cheek. Her fingers slid between mine, gently, snugly. Weight on my chest.

Quiet sobs.

I wanted to comfort her, tell her I'd be alright. I wanted to touch her hair, stroke her arm, tickle her neck. Kiss her mouth. Feel our son growin' inside her.

I could do none of that. I listened, and waited.

It was all I could do.

"I love you, Daryl."

* * *

><p>Weeks.<p>

* * *

><p>A bright light, a face, then darkness.<p>

"What do you mean, if he doesn't wake up?"

"I'm sorry, Beth, but we can't wait forever. He's been like this for too long. Something's gotta give, honey."

"But... We can't just give up on him. He'll pull through!"

"I'm not so sure about that, Bethy."

Another voice.

"I did."

A pause.

"Were you unconscious for two months?"

"... No."

"See?"

"No. I won't let you. Maybe you think he's a lost cause, but _I _have faith. He'll come through! We just have to hold on a little longer."

"How much longer can you give him, honey? He's thin as a rod, nothing's left. I don't even know how he's still breathing."

"He's strong, Maggie. You don't know how strong he is. He'll make it."

"Look, we'll give him til the end of the week. Five more days. If he doesn't wake up before then..."

A deep sigh. "I'll do it. I owe him that much."

"No! You'll stay away from him! He needs to heal, that's all! He'll pull through, goddammit!"

"Beth, honey, calm down-"

"No! You're talking about killing my husband like it's a foregone conclusion! Get out, now! The both of you!"

A door slams.

The warm weight returns to my side, cryin' softly, beggin' me to _please wake up, please, Daryl, wake up, please..._

I wish I could either wake up or just die, already.

_Limbo sucks_.

* * *

><p>"It's been five days, honey. We have to do it."<p>

"No, Maggie, no! Please! Don't do this! Don't take him away from me!"

"I'm sorry Beth, but he's sufferin'. Wastin' away to nothin'. We gotta be humane."

"He eats for me! Please! Please. I... I can't live without him."

"Beth, honey, Daryl wouldn't wanna live this way. He'd wanna go."

"You've got a baby to think about now, Beth. If you lose him... You'll lose Daryl completely. Why lose both when you can save one?"

"No, I don't _want _to choose! I want them _both_!"

"Take her out, I'll do it fast. I'm sorry, Beth."

"_Sonofabitch_! At least let me say goodbye to him, for Christ's sake!"

"...Alright."

A door closes.

Her fingers comb through my bangs, her tears soakin' my shaggy face. I wanna open my eyes so badly, but they don't respond. Nothin' does. Not anymore.

"I love you, Daryl. So much. I love you so much it hurts... In here." She presses our hands to her breast. "I don't want to do this. I _hate _them for doing this."

More tears.

A long pause. Sobs. My face is soaked and cooling.

"I'll name our son after you, sweetheart. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have this little piece of you growing inside me... God. I've been prepared to go first since the Shack, did I ever tell you that? Probably not. The thought of outliving you seems impossible. Unthinkable."

She shifts. Kisses my mouth. Time is short. I don't wanna leave her, but I'm ready to go.

The door opens. "Beth...?"

She kisses my still lips one last time. "I love you, Daryl, I love you. If it weren't for our son I'd be right behind you-"

"Beth! Hush that talk!"

"-I'll miss you, my brave, sweet, wonderful man. I love you."

* * *

><p>A door closes.<p>

Rick's voice.

"Sorry, brother."

I want to smile at that.

A quick prick of pain, and a bright, white light.

_Mama, Merle... Here I come_.

Then...

* * *

><p>Cold air.<p>

Bright light.

"Give me my baby, honey."

"What will you call him, ma'am?"

Her smile is beautiful, her red lips, unlit cigarette clamped in between, plump. It bounces as she speaks. Another face peeps past her arm, curious.

"Daryl. I'll call him Daryl. What do you think, Merle?" She ruffles his hair, removing the cigarette. "My sweet boys." Kisses his head.

The face smiles.

She smiles.

I smile.

"Happy birthday, Daryl. We've been waitin' for you a long time."

* * *

><p>Fin<p>

* * *

><p>Please review... Even if you're mad at me :((( lol I wanna hear your rants! Or, if you loved it, I wanna hear that too! Honestly, tell me anything, haha! :D<p> 


End file.
